Monday, August 26, 2013

Trust the hamster

Give a woman an inch of plausible deniability and her hamster will go the distance:
Barbara, like many women who find ‘romance’ in Negril, says she is shunned by men of her own age in the UK, ‘because they want thinner, younger women and for some reason can get them’.

Over the past decade, I have been researching the increase in female sex tourism in underdeveloped and poorer countries. I made contact with Barbara through a social networking site where I had discovered women exchanging details about long-distance romances with men in Jamaica. Not one of the women used the phrase ‘sex tourism’, but most of them discussed how they had sent money to their ‘boyfriends’ to pay an urgent debt or to rent accommodation in time for their next visit.

None would give me their full names, because their friends and family members are not aware they have been going abroad for sex....

In 2001, research based on 240 interviews with women on the beaches of Negril and two similar resorts in the Dominican Republic suggested that almost a third had engaged in sexual relationships  with local men in the course of their holiday. Of those 80 women, nearly 60 per cent admitted there were ‘economic elements’ to their relationships, but they did not think of themselves as sex tourists, or their sexual partners as prostitutes. Only 3 per cent said their relations were ‘purely physical’, and more than half considered them to be about ‘romance’.
It should be readily apparent that if 80-IQ male prostitutes can convince women that their money-for-sex relationship is a romantic one, you should be able to convince her of anything she wants to believe.  The key to directing female behavior is simply determining what it is that she wants to believe, then giving her an excuse to believe it.

25 comments:

Dexter said...

In some ways you have to admire the ability of the Jamaican and Dominican men to force their bodies to obey the steel of their will. Sex with flabby, sagging, wrinkled, pale British women in their 50s? Eeee-yew. All the Viagra in the Pfizer factory couldn't get me going for that.

Dexter said...

One young man told me the white women he had sex with made him feel sick.


‘They stink, have rough skin and look like old dogs. No wonder they have to pay for a man.’

A hotelier told me the women were ‘all ugly and fat’.

‘Men won’t touch them where they come from,’ he added. ‘I would be ashamed to be seen with any of them.’


There you go. How inna hell do you make that happen, dude?

Anonymous said...

Of course these women will shame guys who do the same exact thing in Thailand.

finndistan said...

"There is an economic element involved" but "they are not sex tourists and the dudes not prostitutes"...

So what?

It ju$t happened?

She fell on some cock, and farted out £££'s?

Her heart was pumping £££'s?

Al said...

Negril Sex Tourism caught on film:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOsmL8GI4TA

Anonymous said...

Sure it's prostitution, but what's fascinating is the differences between when a man engages the services of a prostitute and when a woman engages the services of a prostitute.

Men are paying for sex, and they don't delude themselves that there is anything else involved. It's a simple transaction: money for sex.

These women seem to need to delude themselves into believing there is some deeper meaning involved, and that the man is actually interested in her (and not the money). Rather than sex, I'd suggest what they are actually looking for is validation.

But, to achieve that validation they have to ignore a lot of facts. I believe the correct phrase to describe it is "willing suspension of disbelief."



VryeDenker said...

I knew a woman who wound up buying her "boyfriend" a Porsche, plane tickets around the world, expensive dinners, rare wines, etc. He kept promising her that he will fly her entire family out for the wedding, but when it came time to book, he changed his mind and said he'd send his private jet, or else his yacht. Needless to say, said jets and yachts never materialised. It was one of those "why don't you take care of the bill while I quickly take this phone call" cons. It was masterful. I don't quite know how he got her to buy him that Porsche, but it was probably something along the lines of "my solid platinum credit card is currently at the diamond encrusters, I'll pay you back as soon as they deliver it".

Bobby Dupea said...

There is a kind of domestic sex tourism. An ex-girlfriend, the leading surgeon in her specialty (i.e., not stupid, and someone who in her spare time earned an Ivy MBA for fun) in a two-state area, took up with a car salesman and within six months had bought them a new house in her town (conveniently, he lived 300 miles away) among other things. He was a strapping, bankrupt, married-with-two-children guy. While he did threaten to kill her, on his exposure and she did get a restraining order, she remains wistful for the "relationship" that she thought she had.

So, first project desire and emotion on a physical specimen. Secure sex. Then, rationalize the fantasy.

Dexter said...

A surgeon who gets an MBA -- especially "for fun" -- is, if not stupid, certainly "book smart zero common sense".

Bobby Dupea said...

Dexter, it's great that you are a tough-guy anti-intellectual, but perhaps your genius overlooks the fact that she will shortly run the largest hospital in her state. I respect educated, accomplished women. Your comment would be more honest if you just stated that you like your women stupid and uneducated.

Anonymous said...

...says she is shunned by men of her own age in the UK, ‘because they want thinner, younger women and for some reason can get them’.

A normally distributed population of men and women suggests that there are approximately an equal number of available men and women in every age category. Thus what is really meant by the above statement is "she is shunned by the men who are in the proper wealth/looks category that she finds acceptable."

At the same time, there are likely plenty of men who are nice, but a little pudgy, "beta" and "just not her type".

tz said...

Meanwhile, in the Women Ruin Everything, we are going to have "hamsterpedia"

http://www.motherjones.com/mixed-media/2013/08/storming-wikipedia-women-problem-internet

It has been noted there are far more articles on popular culture than classics. So Bach and Mozart - or even Newton and Liebnitz - are a bit starved, but no one seems to want to storm Wikipedia to add excellence.

Turning Wikipedia into something like a Harlequin romance or Twilight novel?

Weouro said...

Are you still a car salesman Bobby? Did she let you keep the house?

Dexter said...

Dexter, it's great that you are a tough-guy anti-intellectual, but perhaps your genius overlooks the fact that she will shortly run the largest hospital in her state. I respect educated, accomplished women. Your comment would be more honest if you just stated that you like your women stupid and uneducated.

What an asinine response. Love the moronic white-knighting though.

You said she got it "for fun". Now you say she is in hospital management -- and therefore, obviously, she did not get the degree "for fun" but in order to become a hospital administrator. This slightly changes the assertion to which I responded, dumbass.

All the best surgeons I know - including, as it happens, both my parents - are excellent surgeons precisely because they are totally focused on being surgeons and not on anything else. That is why getting some other degree - such as an MBA - is a senseless waste of time and money for someone who wants to be a surgeon and not anything else (e.g., an administrator).

jlw said...

"The key to directing female behavior is simply determining what it is that she wants to believe, then giving her an excuse to believe it."

That's what it is for stupid members of both sexes.

Anonymous said...

A normally distributed population of men and women suggests that there are approximately an equal number of available men and women in every age category.

Most populations skew female because men die sooner. Women dominate the 60+ crowd, and those old birds are cutthroat. If a 65 year old man loses his wife they will be all over him before his wife hits room temperature.

On a side note that is why social security is total BS. Since it is basically a wealth transfer from working class men (who die before they get anywhere near what they paid in) to middle class women (who shouldn't need it, but do, because they spent their whole life as consumer whores).

Anonymous said...

#@ long alpha-numeric string,
I agree with your math, but we are talking about dating age people, not granny. TO the extent that such people are active in the dating pool, it can be stated that they are only mocking dating, like gay people. No long term potential. No child bearing potential.

And in the ranges of people who are in the right range for dating (under 60), the difference isn't that much. you may as well account for all those people who give up on a romantic life by then too.

Further, social security is a wealth transfer from Black men who normally die before ever collecting a dime, to white women who never worked a day in their lives and were set pretty good with personal investments and husband's pensions.

Anonymous said...

8to12: These women seem to need to delude themselves into believing there is some deeper meaning involved, and that the man is actually interested in her (and not the money). Rather than sex, I'd suggest what they are actually looking for is validation.

This should come as no surprise. We don't have testosterone, so rarely - not never - but rarely is sex just for sex, nor can we admit it when it is. It is also telling that this demographic - older women having sex with younger men - will brag about it as if it is about them being able to "get" a younger man. I hadn't really considered the physical challenges from the man's side of this equation, but yeah, money helps. The delusions abound.

LordSomber said...

The whole hamster/sex tourism thing seems to follow similar self-delusional twists as in "Nights of Cabiria". Except this time the men are the prostitutes.

Some lessons are timeless.

Anonymous said...

"It should be readily apparent that if 80-IQ male prostitutes can convince women that their money-for-sex relationship is a romantic one, you should be able to convince her of anything she wants to believe."

It seems possible to convince anyone 40+ of anything. The mess (and our interest) is with younger ones.

Revelation Means Hope said...

"The key to directing female behavior is simply determining what it is that she wants to believe, then giving her an excuse to believe it."
Hmmm. I'm going to replace my SUV with a truck within the next few months. Instead of just announcing and doing it, which is my preferred method, I'm going to experiment with adding this tactic to smooth the road.

Mark said...

This shows the differences between men and women. The women aren't really looking for sex. Many of these women could probably do one night stands with older men back home. As you can see from the middle aged female complaints on any online dating site, older men will have sex with them but just don't want to have anything else to do with them and aren't willing to feign an interest beyond sex to get the sex as the men might have when the same women were younger and prettier. These women are looking for romance and poor foreign men offer them the illusion of romance in exchange for money.

rgoltn said...

Regarding "These women are looking for romance and poor foreign men offer them the illusion of romance in exchange for money." I say that is very true.

I am a MWM, Mid-40's with a wife of 18+ years. We know lots of women friends of ours who are single and would probably pursue such a plan for no other reason than to be with someone - even if that someone is feigning their attraction.

It is sad. We all desire to be touched and be intimate. Many of my wife's friends have not been with a man in months, years etc. I know they long to feel-touch-be with a man. We are all human; intimacy is so important for both men and women.

It is hypocritical that men seeking prostitutes are held in contempt, but women doing something similar, and in denial, are looked as 'tourists.'

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Unknown said...

Give a woman an inch of plausible deniability and her hamster will go the distance: Barbara, like many women who find 'romance' in Negril, ... hamstersreal.blogspot.com

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