The mid-life shame of moving back in with mum and dad: How failed relationships are forcing more and more middle aged women back into their childhood bedrooms.Now, don't be quick to assume that all women are similarly shortsighted. Remember, women, not men, are the ultimately practical sex. So, the trick simply requires convincing them that they are not special snowflakes who are immune to any such possibilities, which, of course, means playing on their fears.
‘I always imagined that by my mid-30s I’d be married or at least living with someone and thinking about starting a family. It felt like the right age to settle down, but everything was unravelling. I’d been living with my partner in a rented house but, when we split up, I couldn’t afford the rent on my own. My illness meant I struggled to work and I was under a lot of financial pressure.’
Clare Harrison has a warning for anyone just starting out in the world of work. ‘I envy people with their own homes,’ she says. ‘Yes their lives in their 20s and 30s were more mundane than mine. They didn’t have the adventures I did, they haven’t seen the world like I have. But does that really count for anything? My memories can’t put a roof over my head.’
Or you could simply leave them to feminism and the "every woman can be president one day" approach, which, if nothing else, is amusing to anyone with even a modicum of mathematical ability.
24 comments:
Leave 'em.
It's evolution in action. Why interfere with a good thing?
Women need a man like a fish needs........water. They were not created to be independent in the way a man is. They were created to be a complement to man, and to bear his children.
It seems like big brother isn't as good a replacement for a man as feminists wanted; especially if they aren't marrying them so they can then get divorced and take all his goodies.
The clueless women never connect the dots. Funny how they moved back home to Mom and Dad who happen to still be together while her relationships failed. The failed relationships occurred when they were in their thirties. A remarriage doesn't happen for many of them. They seem so stylish, but "rode hard". They seem attractive in their twenties, but not 20 years later. I wondered what happened to the career women who should be excelling and exceeding the aspirations of men. I guess it just isn't happening. While you can educate women, women still look at jobs as hobbies that are not taken seriously. Freed from child bearing, they still gravitate to self-improvement that makes them feel better. No wonder they can't find or be with a man. They are too selfish to care.
Yeah "only in America" can any suburban second-grader grow up to be president. They should switch to "only in Christendom can any little girl grow up to be the cherished wife of a just man with her own home and kitchen and kids." It's not totally true but it's way less of a lie.
Two revealing things she said. First, that she expected to be starting a marriage in her mid-30s. Score a point for those of us who say it's the women who are delaying marriage, not men. Her plan all along, and the plan of most women today (and their parents who send them off to college), was to have "adventures" until her mid-30s, and then start the boring family thing, assuming that snagging a willing husband would be the easy part.
Second, the assumption that the women with homes and families had lives more mundane than hers. As if she was off discovering lost cities in foreign lands or something, instead of living the life of most single women: working at a series of office jobs, living with a series of boyfriends, and going out on weekends with "the girls." Truth is, there are plenty of adventures to be had in family life, but she missed out on them too.
You are married, so maybe you don't know. You haven't been around the block, kicking tires. There are hordes of these women. Hordes and hordes. In my late middle age, I wouldn't even consider one of them, after kicking those tires. Most of them still haven't learned. Given half of a financial wind in their sails, from a man, they would be right back to champagne, travel, and avoiding children at all costs. Men, and the world, owe them, dontcha know? Yes, I could control and dominate, but it would be a daily daily. Which was fun as hell when I was younger.
If a woman doesn't want to get married young, then do so, probably best as a virgin, and then accept that role, she will be lost. She will always see work as a way out of "drudgery", and what she has been told is slavery. She doesn't understand economics, or long term returns, on family versus marriage. She can't account for the notion that children are a form of wealth. She has to be inculcated into wisdom, she has none of her own.
Then again, at this time, men have learned that marriage is too risky. Like with new games to play, don't buy them new, upfront. Wait until the price comes down, and the kinks have been ironed out, one way or the other. You can have three or four, or more, middle aged loose hens for the price of one spring chick, if all you want is empty breeding access. Those old hens won't ever lay eggs. Many of them can't, most of them won't. Nothing but side squeezes.
Sometimes the white-knight in me think of how sad it is that these women are being led astray by numerous forces outside of their control. I weep for the next generation and humanity itself.
The black knight in me say "f em'" They will cull them selves from the gene pool and reap what they sow in their own pathetic lives. They should not be protected from their bad decisions since they are harming society afterall.
Unfortunately, I'm not a white knight, so it does bring me a bit of happiness that some justice wins out after all. Still, this will harm the lives of my children as well in the long run.
They'll really be emboldened in January 2017, when Elizabeth Warren is sworn in as president.
Considering how much political might women have when they are only influencing male politicians, it will be interesting to see what they do when actually in power.
Of course, I'm sure they'll concoct a grading method where she is due credit for anything spun as positive, but man is the real culprit for any consequences of her actions.
She can't account for the notion that children are a form of wealth.
With the "$250k to raise a kid through college" figure constantly bandied about, without taking into account everything else, I can understand why people don't think of this. People need to realize that their kids are the most important treasures they'll ever have. Not the crap they collect, or their "memories" of traveling, or anything else.
Then again, at this time, men have learned that marriage is too risky.
Marriage 2.0 is screwing women worse than men, if you think about it. Millions of men who would have gotten married have decided not to because of this ridiculous setup.
Delayed marriage is also really hurting women. When they're hot and young and still able to attract ALPHAs, they also are most likely to have their heads full of liberal crap and believe that delaying marriage is better. But then, as they go into their late 20s or 30s, they collect higher N counts -- getting crazier and crazier in the process -- and of course the men they're having to settle for are more and more BETA.
I can almost but not quite pity her.
This fool was lied to at almost every stage of her life and reason she was lied to was just to keep a lie going.
The fantasy of Sex in the City. That there will be no consequences for your actions and that a sexy husband will appear from nowhere when you are five years past the Wall. That your little adventures (I always love that word) will never lower your marital value.
Take it from a former Marine, adventure is someone else in deep shit, far far away. It is not getting drilled by a Dexter Saint Jock in Nassau.
Recently in Australia we tried the female 'head of state' thing.
It -wasn't- pretty.
The equivalent to the U.S. Democratic Party, the Australian Labor Party; started off with a snivelling little progressive named Kevin Rudd. Then his 'Hillary Clinton clone' & 2IC, one Julia Gillard, 'backstabbed' him to take the leadership of the Labor party.
Scandal after scandal ensued; absolute political retardation ensued. Even the compliant left-leaning media in the end had no choice but to acknowledge said political retardation. All of which resulted in Kevin Rudd being returned to the leadership position prior to the last Australian federal election.
To their credit, the Australian sheep had had enough & elected a 'better' choice in the form of the equivalent to the U.S. Republican Party, the Australian Liberal Party. Given the either/or aspect of Australia's Westminster type political system; the Liberal Party are also a bunch of retards, just not as self destructive & nation destructive as the Labor Party.
As for Julia Gillard, once she resigned from politics, she got caught up in a trade union corruption court case... Class act she aint'...
Rudd wins the game of thrones
http://theconversation.com/rudd-wins-the-game-of-thrones-15573
Corvinus,
Yeah. I have a virgin on the line. On hold. I need to make sure she isn't bat-shit crazy and understands that it is a man's world, before I will commit. I think she hates me, currently. But, being what I am, that is a perfect start. I just need her to start testing my resolve. Bat-shit knows better, but if she has some civility in her... I might could do that. She is almost 20. If she steps into the ring? She has no chance. I'll have six kids in ten years, if I am lazy. Yum!
Then again, at this time, men have learned that marriage is too risky. Like with new games to play, don't buy them new, upfront. Wait until the price comes down, and the kinks have been ironed out, one way or the other
Nah, you want this particular sort of game brand new out of the box. The used-wife market doesn't have many bargains.
Jack,
Who said anything about used wives. Perhaps someone else's wife, though even I would suggest against that, from experience albeit. Never marry. I've had hen houses of these types. I'm simply talking about lovers, empty nest lovers... or... in a few cases, a few fertilized eggs left in someone else's nest. Never marry a used up woman. String her along, maybe, if needed. While doing her friends, coworkers... sisters. Avoid virgins, if just looking for lovers, if you have a conscience. Though that might take a while to create, if you were raised in the raw. Hell, these women love the drama. Some will actively seek new lovers for you, if they think that will keep them as the main hen. And it does, if that's your gig.
I do love when some people actually believe I'm just telling fiction. And there is a... bit more to it all. But the basic premiss is right there. I recommend this only for secular, though that is most men today. The only reason I consider marriage is because I am so locked up that they couldn't squeeze a nickle out of me, no matter the courts, should they choose to part ways. Not a nickle. And... I have a few other... advantages. I feel for most guys, especially the genuine ones. A little jealous that they were raised right, if too, that doesn't seem to be working out. Oh well.
"They didn’t have the adventures I did, they haven’t seen the world like I have."
Betcha she's got some doozies:
* the gangbangs with two football teams at age 16
* flying the world on daddy's dime while sleeping with every man she saw
* partay until dawn every day of the week
* getting stoned every day of the week
What romance! What an adventure!
There's a tribe I remember hearing about in Africa or South America (can't remember exactly where, and a quick Google search hasn't turned up anything) with a wedding tradition where the bride's parents take her childhood bed out of their dwelling and into the jungle and destroy it, as a symbolic reminder that she's marrying into another family and there's no coming back. It's sad that savages have a better sense of how to keep marriages working than modern Westerners do, and this has been true for the last 40 years or more.
Well you younger folks see this from your perspective and that's fine. But as an old fart I can tell you that if my kid wanted to move home again the answer is a polite but firm 'No.'
Maybe society and culture hold that you don't have to act like an adult...but I do. Adults are supposed to live on their own and be independent. Hell - kids are expected to look after their elderly parents, not the other way around.
I wonder sometimes if feminism and liberalism aren't the products of immaturity...?
"Yes their lives in their 20s and 30s were more mundane than mine. They didn’t have the adventures I did, they haven’t seen the world like I have. But does that really count for anything? My memories can’t put a roof over my head."
If she had lived this mundane life, she would have complained about not having the adventures of other people. Then, it would have been Eat, Pray, Love.
Please notice that none of these women complain about not having children. If they had a home, they would be whining about not being a mother. It's as if women had an endless list of wishes in decreasing order of importance. If they get number 1 to 5, they are complaining constantly about number 6. When they get number 6, they start complaining about number 7.
Most women are simply unable to be happy. It's not a bug, it's a feature. Women that are always complaining get more resources for them and their children (before contraceptives, all women had children).
"I wonder sometimes if feminism and liberalism aren't the products of immaturity.."
It's a side effect. Feminism can be summarized this way: "Women must have the most benefits with the least responsibility". But responsibility is what makes you a grown up. When you apply feminism, you end up with women who behave like teenagers.
@Black Poison Soul
Floozies with doozies are coming down the stairs...
"They didn’t have the adventures I did, they haven’t seen the world like I have. "
Translation: "They never scraped up JUST enough money for round-trip airfare to Paris, and then spent the next 3 months spreading their legs each & every night in exchange for dinner & a place to sleep that night"
Who said anything about used wives. Perhaps someone else's wife, though even I would suggest against that, from experience albeit. Never marry.
I do believe we had this discussion a while back. No need to re-hash it here.
If you're looking to get married, marry something close to a virgin. Do not under any circumstances marry a woman with an N greater than... 3? Even that's pushing it.
If you're not looking to get married, do the human race a favor and stay away from low-n women. Content yourselves with the cougars and incipient cougars. Do yourself a favor and learn to pay attention to this advice. The time will shortly come once again when "stealing a woman's virtue" will likely get you buried in a shallow and forgotten grave.
Jack... wtf are you talking about?
If you marry a woman, you aren't "stealing her virtue"....
For a man: marriage and the almost inevitable divorce (50%) is a guaranteed road towards financial ruin. Best to outsource everything and stay single.
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