- Caring and protection
- Personal accountability and hard work
- Courage and a willingness to fight
- Commitment and self-control
Thursday, June 12, 2014
Fathers are the civilizing force
If you read through the lessons these successful men say they learned from their fathers, a few common themes rapidly become apparent:
23 comments:
It would be interesting to test grown children, men anyway, who aren't raised with a father, or full time, compared to men who were. Females without fathers tend to end up as unwed mothers, and very young. But males... It would be interesting to see research along these lines. Not the statistics for crime, and drug use, and a few other things. Those are already fairly well documented. More the differences, and similarities, and perhaps even when, later in life, the two groups merge to become more similar.
Women do teach those things, or try to do so. The problem isn't so much that they don't encourage those things, it's that they do so from the perspective, and nature, of the feminine. Which simply doesn't translate. Women work very differently, their notions of protection are social not physical (because they can't defend themselves, at least without a gun). It just doesn't translate. It's part of why, at 10, I asked to go into a foster home. I NEEDED a father, not a tyrannical crazy woman who was about to get leveled if she struck me one more time for some stupid reason or other. And, yeah, I could have done it. I knew that wasn't quite right, though, so chose another way.
Got a dad when I needed one, and a good one.
Great post Vox. We need to repeat, repeat, and repeat again the basic, obvious truths to a world that is wholly confused and lost. And if they're not totally lost, then ofttimes they are actively trying to deny these simple truths until it's too late, aka in their 30s, 40, 50s.
I guess you could say it's timely that I re-read this classic article last night.
http://mises.org/daily/2892
Vox,
One thing you may have overlooked that pertains here is the socio-sexual class of the father.
For example, my father is firmly a gamma. I wasn't really taught any of those values. In fact, I struggled to learn them from other men, which took longer than it should and was more painful than it could have been otherwise.
So even though I'm fiercely competitive and the eldest, I shake out to be more of a beta (or a delta, but I'll leave that for others to decide).
I am one of the men raised by a single mother. Parents divorced at 9 and father died when I was 12. I never had the male role model to teach me the things Vox mentioned above, but somehow I figured it out on my own although it took me til my early 30's. As a divorced father raising 2 kids on my own, my goal for my kids is to guide them along the path described above, and not the one I went down as a young boy. Their mother has none of the things listed, and could never teach them or lead by example. I am not sure any woman could.
One thing you may have overlooked that pertains here is the socio-sexual class of the father.
Good point. All of the men quoted here are involved with professional football, either as players, coaches, or team owners. So, they tend to be towards the Alpha end of the spectrum.
Fatherhood is under assault in every way described here and more. They're working to break down the family, but for those families that manage to stay intact, there's always Child Protective Services. Recently one father was legally punished for making his son carry a brick as punishment, another for making his kid walk a mile to school.
And now this:
http://proteinwisdom.com/?p=53998
--Martel
While at the same time small families, PC-infiltrated organizations that used to offer good role models, and men steeped in churchianity means few if any quality masculine role models are available for those dispossessed of their fathers.
"Marriage, families, and fathers are necessary for transforming a human society into a civilized human society."
Amen. Preach it! This needs to heard all over America (and the world) through speaker phone over-and-over again.
This also: "And anything that weakens the institutions of marriage, family, and fatherhood is an intrinsically anti-civilizational force."
Amen. This needs to be preached everywhere. People can deny but the truth will always stare them in the face.
I agree with Mr. d......... from above. The socio-sexual rank of fathers can determine what and how boys learn and grow learning from their father.
A proper, family-man Alpha brings a whole different experience in fatherhood than having a beta, delta, gamma (omega?) father.
"And anything that weakens the institutions of marriage, family, and fatherhood is an intrinsically anti-civilizational force. "
Amen Vox. So now explain to me why you present such an unpleasant portrayal of relationships between men and women? Why do you not advocate more for the joys of family life? Why do you portray women in such an evil and undesirable light? I adore men, Vox. I am my father's daughter. I have a great deal of love and loyalty towards my husband. And you hate me. Why?
So we should lie to men so they jump into modern marriage with no clue about how dangerous it is GG? That seems a good way to produce very angry men. How about you work on reforming the system and arguing against the behavior of your sisters?
Why do you portray women in such an evil and undesirable light?
"...anything that weakens the institutions of marriage, family, and fatherhood is an intrinsically anti-civilizational force."
I have never read anything where Vox portrays women who aren't weakening the institution of marriage, family, and fatherhood in an evil and undesirable light.
I adore men, Vox. I am my father's daughter. I have a great deal of love and loyalty towards my husband. And you hate me. Why?
True loyalty to your husband would require your not caring one bit about what Vox thinks of you.
"True loyalty to your husband would require your not caring one bit about what Vox thinks of you."
After several months of constant insults at VD's blogs, Sarah, I think we can safely conclude that I really don't give a crap about what anyone thinks of me, least of all you.
Vox's hatred however, is projected onto other people, people who LEAVE the Christian faith because they think he is representative of it. His pathetic view of women actually inspires a whole new set of girls to become feminists every day. Those things matter to me, Sarah.
Vox's hatred however, is projected onto other people, people who LEAVE the Christian faith because they think he is representative of it.
This reminds me of an assignment my daughter had recently. The teacher read a letter to the class from "their Mother Earth" about how disappointed she was in how they have been treating her. The assignment was to write a letter back to "Mother Earth" telling how the student plans to change her ways and treat her better. My daughter keenly noted that if she is to treat the Earth as a god, what a weak god it must be that she could damage it.
You sadly portray God as very weak when you write this type of lunacy. Please tell me, GG, who has left the Christian faith because of what they have read here.
The only projection that is occurring here is yours, GG. You desire Vox to hate you, it would be so much more satisfying than the indifference he shows you coupled with an occasional "shut up" (which in actuality is for your benefit, you make such an ass out of yourself it would be an honor to your husband if you'd heed Vox's request for you to stop).
You asked why he hates you. This is not a question one asks if they don't care what a particular individual thinks of them. Unless they are crazy.
One has to understand that Game is in the works here, Sarah.
Although Vox is not gaming GG, the core game concept is being applied.
GG is hooked now unto Vox after getting enough "shut up" from him.
The only projection that is occurring here is yours, GG. You desire Vox to hate you, it would be so much more satisfying than the indifference he shows you coupled with an occasional "shut up" (which in actuality is for your benefit, you make such an ass out of yourself it would be an honor to your husband if you'd heed Vox's request for you to stop).
The only useful purpose the babbling old biddy serves is to illustrate many of the points I've made about female failings. But she recently tried to bring her clueless solipcism to VP, from where I had to spam her.
Notice how she tries to make absolutely everything both personal and about herself. This, women, is exactly what you do not want to be if you want any respect from men.
"GG said...
...
His pathetic view of women actually inspires a whole new set of girls to become feminists every day. Those things matter to me, Sarah.
June 12, 2014 at 8:37 PM "
Are you really this dense? I find it hard to imagine such blindness though I'm not surprised at the hubris. Thanks for writing this GG. It is the quintessential proof of what you are at your core whether you acknowledge it or not. You elevate women above their husbands and therefore above God Himself. Congratulations, today you've proven your feminist credentials.
"Notice how she tries to make absolutely everything both personal and about herself."
If you fools are going to play the solipsism game, at least take the time to learn the bloody rules. What you cannot see in yourselves, you try to project onto others. Since nobody can exist outside of your own perceptions, you must assign characteristics to others that you don't like in yourself.
Yes, Vox Day is named all over the internet as "the reason I became a feminist" and as "the reason I am now an atheist." I've probably gotten 50 emails over the years using Vox as an example of why feminism is necessary, why God is not worthy of believing in, and why the far left is in charge of our country. I have spent months trying to disprove these claims and lost the battle badly.
"This, women, is exactly what you do not want to be if you want any respect from men."
I actually have the admiration of so many men and it's absolutely delightful. I live in a very lovely world full of wonderful men who genuinely like me. And I have a great deal of respect and admiration for all of them. The center of this world of course is my husband, a man full of a great deal of integrity, humility, and honor, who, although he is not God, is actually living proof that God is good.
It is not judgment and condemnation that leads people to Christ, just as it is not the judgment and condemnation of men that leads women to love them.
Is there some compelling reason that I'm unaware of to continue validating GG's trolling presence here? I really think she's demonstrated all of the varieties of ignorance that has in her tool kit. Any further devotion of notice to her output is not only wearisome, but counter-productive.
GG, if you're gonna continue your imaginary jousts to defend Jesus on the Internet, I'd suggest you go read what he said in Matthew 5:22 before ever saying "you fools" to someone online again.
GG you seem to be contradicting yourself.
First you say,
"GG said... June 12, 2014 at 8:37 PM
...
Vox's hatred however, is projected onto other people, people who LEAVE the Christian faith because they think he is representative of it.
... "
Then you say,
"GG said... June 13, 2014 at 8:10 AM
...
I've probably gotten 50 emails over the years using Vox as an example of why feminism is necessary, why God is not worthy of believing in, and why the far left is in charge of our country.
...
"
Which is it, former Christians telling you about losing their faith or is it comfirmed heathens seeking to invalidate a belief in God? That you seemingly can't tell the difference tells any reader that you don't respect your husband or he doesn't know his Bible or likely doesn't fear the Lord
Who are you really? Because from what you've written here you're not somebody that knows the Bible or the Lord.
Secondly, why are heathens sending you personal emails? Why are you, purportedly a woman, seeking to engage them personally at all? That's not your job lady. Your job is to be a wife to your husband. Once again we see where your true motivation lies.
As for this,
"GG said... June 13, 2014 at 8:10 AM
...
I have spent months trying to disprove these claims and lost the battle badly.
..."
Why don't you ask your husband what you're doing wrong? The hubris just oozes out of every word you write. You condemn yourself with your own words and then wonder why others tell you that is what you are doing.
And I'm done. No more feeding the troll.
"Why don't you ask your husband what you're doing wrong?"
I have. In fact, he's the one who taught me why atheists exist, why feminists exist, and why the left is now in charge of our country. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Nothing springs to life out of a void.
"Secondly, why are heathens sending you personal emails? Why are you, purportedly a woman, seeking to engage them personally at all? That's not your job lady."
Because I communicate with people, blog, and engage with the world. And yes, it is my job.
Like a gold ring in a pig's snout ....
I think socioeconomic is key in many respects, as is family structure and geography.
I've been analyzing this "game" matter as a happily married father of 7 and one big takeaway I have is that it applies way, waaay less to country girls than suburban women. Especially country girls w/ intact families. Growing up in an elite North Dallas suburb, I hated the girls in my HS. The very definition of alpha chasing sluts. I had a name for them ...Plano b-----s.
I was definitely trending hard beta or worse. Freshman year of college was the same way, because so many chicks from my huge HS went to UT, and UT itself was so huge, we wound up hanging out together. It was a year of intense frustration. But towards the end of my freshman year I started meeting other women mostly from rural TX and the prospects mightily improved. In some ways, being a frat daddy from the big city conferred a much higher status in these women's eyes. Anyway, for a year, it was score city. I love country girls.
Then I met my wife. Through some casual friendships later I found that country/city dynamic carries over into adulthood.
Another aspect of country upbringing is a stronger foundation in the church, typically, lesser divorce rates (or used to be), and often extended family cohesion that can to some extent make up for absent father.
This is taking me back a ways to a diferent life and I strongly recommend courting a very orthodox Christian girl with family supervision to young men today. The dating scene is only getting more toxic and stultifying of Grace.
Sorry to hijack thread with tangential comments.
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