I am hoping you can give me some advice or point me in the right direction. My wife and I are having trouble and she is about to move out. There is no other man or anything like that. The marriage just deteriorated for both of us.First, let me point out that Maxim 2 is Roissy's advice, not mine. Second, while I'm loathe to intrude upon what is more properly Athol's territory, I would say that before this man attempts anything, he must first ascertain if his wife is already engaging in an affair. It sounds to me as if that is at least a possibility, even if she denies that is the case.
I just read your post, "Maxim 2: make her jealous" and it just slapped me hard in the face that in the 3 years of marriage I forgot almost every damn thing that I learned about game that I used to win her in the first place. I was an alpha dog fucking her and ever other girl I could find. Now, I am some boring predictable husband that simply provides her a safe comfortable live. Worse, I thought it was enough. Shame on me.
I want to save the marriage if I can because I certainly like her well enough and she is gorgeous but mostly because of the financial ruin it will wreck on me. She doesn't work and I will pay a fortune for her and our child if she leaves, which will seriously cramp my style when finding another girl. If I do the things she needs I think we would both be happy.
She hasn't left yet and it is like she is waiting for me to react a certain way. I think my game hasn't been terrible in the last few days in trying to keep her to stay - but I don't think it has been great either. I didn't ask her to stay or do anything pathetic. Instead, I bought lots of very nice clothes to up my wardrobe, started making myself scarce, and showing no signs that it bothered me that she is leaving. I told her that I wanted the same thing, that I already felt free and the idea of hunting again made me feel alive. I also told her that I am going to start dating a girl from work (which is true if I want to). But, I really want to say, "I remember what I need to do and I am going to take you upstairs and show you right now".
I think I have the inner game mostly right but I am not sure of the best immediate tactical steps I need to do to get her to stay so I can do for her what she needs. It may be too late and if that is the case then so be it. But I am going to try. I am concerned that any affection will simply signal AFC and any indifference will simply tell her that it is over and she should go. I am thinking that maybe it is best to let her go and then be the alpha dog to get her back. Not sure - as I have no experience here. If I could, I would be the first to leave but I can't because I own the house and there are kids involved.
I would appreciate any advice you can give.
Third, I think he has to stop dancing around the issues. If he really wants to say something, he should say it. How can he worry about showing affection being too AFC when he's afraid to say what he really thinks, and tell her what he really wants? There can be a fine line between Indifference Game and actively driving a woman away.
He's obviously running the MAP, which is necessary, but in this case apparently insufficient. If she's really so unconcerned that she doesn't care if he's dating other women or not, it's already over and his attempts to win her back are likely to be futile.