Sunday, August 21, 2016

Identity defines

The heartbreak of a woman who identifies as the wife of a man to whom she is not married:
I am a cisgender heterosexual female, but I am also something more. I am the voice of the thousands whom civil rights progress has passed by and who still conceal their true identity from an exclusive society.

This is the identity closet no one wants to acknowledge, which is what makes it so devastating for those who find themselves inside. I did not even realize how hard I had been working to hide my true self until I met Mr. X, but suddenly it was as though all those awkward moments of my past came into focus and I could see the meaning of my whole life. I am—I always have been—the wife of Mr. X.

Coming out was one of the hardest decisions of my life, and at times the hatred and heartache I’ve faced have been worse than I could have imagined. Hardest of all is the rejection from Mr. X himself, who has declared publicly he has no interest in me whatsoever. But I know that no matter what anyone says, I have to be true to myself. And I know without a shadow of a doubt that my true identity is wife of Mr. X.
The real question for society is a difficult one. If this poor non-cismarried woman decides she wants a divorce, how much money should Mr. X be required to pay her?

30 comments:

Rex Little said...

Obviously satire.

VD said...

Good eye, spergatron. Sperg on. Sperg strong.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

Fantastic.

liberranter said...

The real question for society is a difficult one. If this poor non-cismarried woman decides she wants a divorce, how much money should Mr. X be required to pay her?

LOL! Another question is, in what alternate-universe currency would the transaction take place? Delusion dollars, or bat-shit bucks?

Rex Little said...

You're right, VD, that was spergy of me. My only excuse is that I wasn't fully awake when I wrote it.

Incidentally, is the use of "sperg" as a verb something you coined, or is it widespread?

Bard said...

That is pretty good.

L. Beau said...

"sperg" and its adjective form, "spergy", have been around for a while now, Rex

Ben Cohen said...

Thought it was some freak writing from salon or Jezebel.

Otto Lamp said...

Off topic...

Both of your sites are all but unbrowsable on a mobile device.

I'm doing more "quick browsing" with my phone. When I have a few spare minutes I'll pull my phone out and browse a couple of news websites. And, I'm sure I'm not the only one. Phone usage as a web browsing platform is increasing.

I'm not sure if this is a blogspot thing, or something else, but the mobile experience on both your sites is awful. I'm sure it's costing you web traffic.

Otto Lamp said...

Parody, but makes the point.

Identifying yourself as something doesn't make it true. And, the rest of the world shouldn't have to kowtow to your irrational fantasies.

Arthur Isaac said...

No doubt this will be a thing on Tumblr in a week. The spirit of the age approves. Satire and Poes indistinguishable from "normal" human behavior. Square is the most exotic form.

Audacity17 said...

How will this guy ever successfully run dread game?

Arthur Isaac said...

@Otto, using a phone right now. Have been all year. Android OS with Chrome (I know).

mettlehed said...

Someone's been watching A LOT of anime.

mettlehed said...

Someone's been watching A LOT of anime.

Otto Lamp said...

@Arthur Isaac,

I didn't say it was impossible. I said it was a bad experience (which it is).

There are some sights I actually prefer to browse via a phone, but this ain't one of them.

Arthur Isaac said...

Try it with 1x coverage on the backside of Nowhere Mountain in Alaska.

Daniel said...

How romantic! It had to be cismet!

ChickenChicken Sweep said...

How long can this remain satire, given the premise that self-identification is inviolable, ineluctable truth (except, of course, terrorists who claim to terrorize in the name of Islam, they're just complete liars)?

Mr.MantraMan said...

BB10 works very well

William English said...

The best humor always has an element of truth to it. My guess is that every famous male has had a stalker and we only hear about the ones where law enforcement gets involved. It would be interesting to see a breakdown of how the different rankings handle the situation.

My guess:
Alpha; has an effective way of nipping the problem in the bud.
Beta; calls the police, attempts to ignore
Delta; attempts to reason with her, eventually calls the police
Gamma; has a relationship with her
Omega; she is the one to call the police
Lambda; we don’t really want to know
Sigma; “Jerome… take care of this bitch” // Moris Day

David Letterman became even more of a recluse, Michael Jackson hired a bunch of security and wrote a song about her, Moby let her move in take over his life.

VH1 did a “Behind the Music” about Billy Jean (the Michael Jackson song). They did a great job of showing where hypergamous and insanity collide.

Artisanal Toad said...

I see this as neither a satire or a parody, it's a parable for modern times. The moral of the story is that batshit crazy is real. How one chooses to deal with the potential bunny-boiler is another story, but if one thinks about it such women could be useful under the right circumstances. The opportunities for black knighting would be off the scale, but it would take the right sort of man.

A serious asshole might be able to do something with such a woman. A complete asshole would probably be able to do interesting things, but if a perfect asshole wound up with one or two women like this it would be time to get the popcorn.

Tom K. said...

"If thinking you're a woman had the same consequences are thinking you can fly,
There'd be a lot fewer men thinking they are women."

SciVo said...

OT: "Researchers have found that watching more than five hours of TV a day can slash a man’s sperm count by a third. ... They also had lower levels of the male hormone testosterone, which the body needs to produce sperm. But scientists found spending time sitting at a computer did not appear to have the same adverse effect." (h/t Instapundit)

I don't buy their explanation that heavy computer users are more likely to be exercising and eating healthily. It probably has more to do with previous studies showing that the average mood of someone watching TV is "mildly depressed." (But it's supposed to be entertainment! Whaaa?) Also I expect that the passive nature of TV-watching is a factor, since the mind-body connection goes both ways.

Aeoli Pera said...

The real question for society is a difficult one. If this poor non-cismarried woman decides she wants a divorce, how much money should Mr. X be required to pay her?

All of it, obviously.

VFM #7634 said...

@William English
Sounds about right. The high-value reaction would be some form of telling her directly, "Nah, I'm not interested, go away," and letting her yell. It's the Deltas and Gammas who would have the most difficulty getting rid of stalkers, because of their great fear of having to deal with an upset woman. And I can totally imagine a Gamma starting a relationship with her.

tweell said...

Since female self-identity and feels are all-important, Mr. X should be compelled to marry this woman, as well as any others that have the same beliefs. His beliefs and religion have no bearing on this requirement. The Matriarchy reigns supreme!

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Dapid Jack said...

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traderdoc said...

Can solipsism acheive any greater heights?

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