Friday, September 4, 2015

Delta Man: Things which are hidden


Unless you’ve been living on another planet this last month you’ll have read or heard about the Ashley Maddison hack and the fallout. Everyone from government officials to pastors and theologians have been caught up in it causing ruined reputations, marriages, and causing grief.
 
I’m not going to moralize you on how adultery is wrong as I am confident that most people already think it is wrong, but the take away here is that what you do in secret has a possibility of one day being exposed and causing a lot of damage. I’m not speaking of privacy here like bank account numbers or legitimate business which need to remain secret to avoid theft or unwanted intrusions. These are the dark things you do you and try to keep hidden from your family and friends as you’d be embarrassed if they were found out. The easy one is the porn collection you might have stashed, but what about other activities? Petty theft, trolling on sites under various names, inappropriate communication with women if you are in a LTR or married, spending family money on things and not being open about it, shady business dealings, and the list goes on. The true test of character is not what a man does when others see him, but what he does when no one sees him.
 
So what’s the antidote? In the immortal words of The Humungus: “Just walk away.” Close the accounts, dump the stash, clean up the finances, stop the communications; walk out of the dark and into the light. It won’t be easy because the dark is fun, it’s pleasurable, which is why we do it, but if you want to be a better man you need to do your best to avoid the dark.

This pertains directly to Game because regardless of modern notions of relationships women still follow their men’s lead. If you are a crook, she’ll be inclined to be one too. If you have secrets she may not know what you are keeping secret, but she’ll soon sense you have one and have some of her own. It’s not like she won’t have a choice, but she will clearly by influenced by your actions. I hear a lot of complaints on this site and others about the low moral character of modern women and I can’t argue that fact, but how can you expect them to be virtuous if you are not? Is the solution to evil to repay it with more evil? I can’t say that having high moral character will get you a date on Saturday night, but it won’t stop you either, and you’ll have the benefit of being authentic and not living in fear of what people might find out about you.

I realize this post is being given from a soap box, but if you clean up your act you'll probably thank me one day when the light unexpectedly shines on you.

29 comments:

Ron said...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6p1EuLz9Fes

:)

CostelloM said...

I agree with the spirit of this post to a degree but I'm careful with truth. I am not swayed that it is good to speak truths which can be used against you to a woman. I'm not on the Madison site but if I was I wouldn't admit it even if caught. I owe my girl the truth to a degree but not completely and certainly not if I categorically know the information could cause me harm if misused. "Did you post on the Madison site?!?!" "Oh yes I did and I met three women" is not a good thing to admit. If we lived in a world without divorce rape solely for the male then confession might be a good choice, one that would help you avoid doing it again, but even then never to her. And if your former church is the kind where the pastor recommends divorce lawyers to his female parishioners well then its probably a good idea to stop the behavior and keep your confessions between you and the LORD.

Ominous Cowherd said...

Don't do things you don't want made public. Don't feel that you should burden your wife with every thought you have, either. "Just walk away from your sins " is different than "confess everything you did or think of doing."

I think my first sentence is the real point of the article: don't do things you don't want made public.

Trust said...

True. I'm im my 40s and keep fit, but recently tried a testosterone booster to help with certiain things. Just yesterday my wife found it.

Main point, wives have literally hundreds of hours to go through things, and they will. Another reason it's foolish for a man to cheat.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

What's amusing is that so many people apparently believe the women on AM are fake.

Res Ipsa said...

the benefit of being authentic

A genuine man of integrity is as elusive as the hot virgin with dreams of being a stay at home wife and mother. One will by nature attract the other.

Trust said...

" What's amusing is that so many people apparently believe the women on AM are fake."
_______

It's not unrealistic to think some may be. But it's also true that not too many alphas would bother with AM, so the women are probably unresponsive to the men (read: non alphas) who do.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

Really? I would imagine majority of men are too risk averse to go on AM.

Anonymous said...

What's amusing is that so many people apparently believe the women on AM are fake.
...
I would imagine majority of men are too risk averse to go on AM.


And yet, how many women have been outed as AM clients? I've seen a few men have their accounts made public, but unless I've missed it, no chicks.

I rather doubt the hack was done by pedestalizing gammas out to fight the patriarchy.

Scott Pierce said...

I agree with the spirit of this post. So many men here and elsewhere with a similar theme are so cynical regarding women; however, they don't seem to acknowledge the same veneer which covers them. It may look different, but men aren't any more virtuous by nature. I would say, "like attracts like".

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

The Narrative demands that women be portrayed as sweet special snowflakes and blameless angels when it comes to these matters. The reality, of course, is very different. You would be surprised at the number of women open to fooling around, and I'm not just talking about the ones I've met.

Trust said...

I could be wrong, but I see the risk averse as more likely to go on AM. it's easier to deal through a computer than risk personal rejection. Alphas usually have options lining up.

Trust said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Trust said...

I don't think men or women are more virtuous, both are better and worse in many ways.

However, no one bends over backwards to paint male vice as virtue or victimhood as they do with female vice.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

The risk averse don't do anything. They suffer in silence with wives who despise them. Or they use porn or whatever. They paint their situation as noble suffering, but they're fooling themselves.

Most of the men I've known who have fooled around--sometimes in the office at odd hours--were successful advisors, executives, and bankers.

There are certain bars and restaurants in this area where it's very easy to meet married hotties. This is a thing.

Anonymous said...

Not a bad post, but it's a manosphere version of "Teach men not to rape!"

Women like bad men. Women are attracted to the dark triad. You telling men they need to get their act together won't change the fact that a huge percent of women are bored by decent, honorable men and like the excitement of crooked, thug, human trash.

SirHamster said...

Not a bad post, but it's a manosphere version of "Teach men not to rape!"

What? No. This is for becoming a Delta man.

A man can hold his head high because his integrity is intact. Any dark shameful things hidden away that can destroy his public image means that his current "integrity" is a sham.

So become a man of integrity by eradicating the dark shameful things. What women do in relation to that is irrelevant.

Manu said...

This is good advice, to a point. Archerfish21 raises a good point: women like dark triad men. At the same time, though, applying this is selective. Take a case in point: I DJ at clubs and events that would absolutely frighten a lot of people. One is actually a BDSM club. However, if the light unexpectedly shined on me, I wouldn't care about that. I'd say "yeah, I DJed those parties. I like to work and get paid. Got a problem?"

So this advice is less about being a perfect paragon of acceptable moral behavior -- you'd need to be Christ for that, anyway -- it's about not doing anything that would break you, that you would be ASHAMED OF if it came to light.

Unfortunately for me, I was a complete fucking Gamma rabbit tool in my youth, and so there is plenty of crap that would embarrass me buried in the bowels of the internet. Though, they aren't really *bad* things per se, so much as they are just stupid, childish and ignorant. The best I can do is try not to add anything new to that list, and visibly distance myself from earlier poor behavior.

This post is a good reminder to keep the faith in that regard.

Matamoros said...

Hmm. Reminds me of the American diplomat during the Cold War in Poland whom Polish Intelligence had lured into a honey pot. He was married with children, loved his wife, etc.

The Polish KGB invited him to a meeting, sat him down and showed him the pictures threatening to unmask his escapades. He calmly looked at them, and said, "I'd like 5 of these in 8x10, these in 5x8,"

End of the effort for the KGB. If a man doesn't care it won't hurt him. Otherwise the old advice of deny everything, admit nothing is best. A guy's wife once caught him in a dalliance and began screaming at him. He looked at her and asked, "Who are you going to believe, me or your lying eyes." I understand she calmed down and all was well. Definitely Alpha that.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

"If a man doesn't care it won't hurt him."

Precisely. It's that "I don't give a fuck" attitude that certain men have.

I'm sure there are at least a few men "caught out" by the AM hack who just shrug their shoulders and think, 'What's the worst that can happen, that everyone knows that I have a big cock and I like to fuck?'

BFD.

Artisanal Toad said...

Reminds me of an old joke, the punch line being something along the lines of

Grandson, listen to me and learn.

They don't call me George the churchbuilder, even though I built churches.
They don't call me George the bridgebuilder, even though I built bridges.
THey don't call me George the homebuilder, even though I built a lot of homes.

That kind of thing rarely brings you a nickname.

"but if you get caught fucking just one goat..."

Student in Blue said...

@Laguna Beach Fogey
What's amusing is that so many people apparently believe the women on AM are fake.

For good reason, apparently.

http://voxday.blogspot.com/2015/08/cheating-with-nonexistent-women.html

SciVo said...

Dammit. I am required to notify you that you have only a few years (two to five) to get your affairs in order all the way down to your bank accounts, before The Doxening. (Weird, I thought it looked better with double Xs, but my phone autocorrected.)

Anyway, it sucks being a prophet, yadda yadda yadda, and you should listen to the Word of the Lord our G-d before it is too late.

Clean up your act now, and you can be the job applicant who didn't have a subscription to a fetish porn site. Or not, your call.

Rex Little said...

As Jack Amok noted, the names made public from the hack are all men. If there are any women signed up with AM, I'd guess they're hookers looking to expand their clientele. Women looking to have affairs can find them easily enough without going online.

Christopher B said...

I think the claim that the vast majority of female AM accounts were fake or inactive needs to be taken with a grain of salt, or more. For one thing, it plays into the meme of men spending most of their time thinking with the little head. Any analysis that supported this conclusion would be published immediately even if done incorrectly. I have read (sorry for no cite) that the person who did this analysis has subsequently downplayed the claim when data and method problems were pointed out. I personally question the methodology of relying on checking the AM inbox as an indicator that the account was fake. Most of those sites now provide an email digest or notification of incoming activity. A woman signing up to get her ego stroked had didn't necessity need to logon to see offers from men.

Christopher B said...

I think the claim that the vast majority of female AM accounts were fake or inactive needs to be taken with a grain of salt, or more. For one thing, it plays into the meme of men spending most of their time thinking with the little head. Any analysis that supported this conclusion would be published immediately even if done incorrectly. I have read (sorry for no cite) that the person who did this analysis has subsequently downplayed the claim when data and method problems were pointed out. I personally question the methodology of relying on checking the AM inbox as an indicator that the account was fake. Most of those sites now provide an email digest or notification of incoming activity. A woman signing up to get her ego stroked had didn't necessity need to logon to see offers from men.

Unknown said...

Rex,

Yeah, that's the difference. It's not that women aren't slutty; it's just that they don't have to go to the trouble of making an online profile to get laid. They can just stop turning down the offers they've been getting. Or if they don't want to fish too near home, they can hit a bar in a different neighborhood. They want to dress up and go out with friends anyway, so why not do that instead of typing and trying to pick out a picture that doesn't show any flab?

Add to that the fact that making up a profile on a site and then arranging meetings makes it a lot harder to frame it afterwards as, "Oops, I was just at a party and had one too many and fell on this guy's dick several times, but I'm not a slut." I know one woman with model-quality looks who had crowds of men chasing her well into her 30s, and when she hit about 40 and created her first dating profile (on a normal dating site), she hated doing it. She'd take it down as soon as she had anything going, because she hated admitting that she was looking for a man instead of selecting from a buffet.

So it makes perfect sense that nearly all the women on AM were hideous, bots, prostitutes, or scammers.

LP2021 Bank of LP Work in Progress said...

What is done in the dark or secret is open scandal in heaven.

Given gaurded or private thoughts are part of the human psyche, its just that matters eventually spill out. Such should be dealt with and exited from one's thinking, no need to ruminate on the unproductive or useless or whats not salvageable while continuing forward.

Daniel said...

Dark Triad is not for delta. It is for people trying to achieve beta or alpha or (and why the hell would you) sigma.

Pure Delta aspirant is far better off living a clean life and achieving goals without those things that so easily beset him, and drag him down into gamma hell.

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