One of Britain’s top NHS fertility specialists last night issued a stark warning to women: Start trying for a baby before you’re 30 – or risk never having children.Parents have to take some responsibility too. Stop telling them that college and career come first unless you genuinely don't want to have grandchildren. And even then you shouldn't tell them that because it's not your decision.
In a strongly worded letter to Education Secretary Nicky Morgan, consultant gynaecologist Professor Geeta Nargund has also demanded that teenagers are taught about the dangers of delaying parenthood, because of the spiralling cost to the taxpayer of IVF for women in their late 30s and 40s.
Professor Nargund cites the agony of a growing number of women left childless as a key reason why fertility lessons must be included in the national curriculum.
Prof Nargund writes: ‘I have witnessed all too often the shock and agony on the faces of women who realise they have left it too late to start a family. For so many, this news comes as a genuine surprise and the sense of devastation and regret can be overwhelming. And so often the cry will be “Why did no one warn me about this?”
Marriage and children are far more important for women than college and career. Most women who have experience of all four will say as much.
30 comments:
That hamsters are strong.
From the comments:
BJBbr73, London, United Kingdom, 1 week ago
What a ridiculous article. We live in a time when people are generally living longer, healthier lives and there should be no reason to "force" anything on anyone. I used the pill from the age of 16 to 35. I gave birth to my child at 39. I conceived naturally and quickly, without any issues. I am with my second husband now and very happy. My first husband and I we were together for 14 years. We met when I was 18. It never felt right to have a baby with him, thankfully, I didn't. Instead, I focused on a career, travelling & living around the world & having a fabulous life. Not once was I concerned about my "body clock". If I had listened to this article and forced a baby into that situation, there is a strong possibility it would have all been far worse; or I would still be in a very miserable situation. I say: DO WHAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU! Society isn't always right. As a side note- I also do not agree with IVF, freezing eggs, etc. as it is incredibly invasive and taxing on the human body.
Me, me, me, me (and tingles followed by beta schlub anyone?)
Sally, Sydney, 1 week ago
Women are perfectly aware of their body clocks. It's men that need the lessons. I was ready for a baby four years before my husband. When are these people going to start lecturing men as well and pointing out that, unless they're bad people, their wife's infertility will become theirs if they don't get it together?
It's all menz fault! Wahhhhhh! Cause MEN are telling us to put off having kids and go have a career and that getting married and being a hausfrau is tantamount to seerf-itude and slavery!
OK - even that little bit of snark was likely unbecoming.... no matter how well deserved.
Also, in that first comment, note the attitude that her, and her experience all by itself, is sufficient to disprove the maths and general population statistics.
Solopsism and narcissism at its finest. I almost feel sorry she had a kid at all.
But it's *not fair* (stamping feet in impotent rage) that women have to make that choice, while men can choose to delay marriage and fatherhood until they're older, and if it's not fair that means we can deny it, and everybody should help us to deny it, and we can force society to reorganize itself consistent with that denial, and ....
This same standard doesn't apply to men of course. We can seed children until our death.
Women are perfectly aware of their body clocks. It's men that need the lessons.
Men don't have a body clock, aside from general aging.
The fact that God made female humans one of the few mammals who go sterile halfway through their life is by itself damning of the college-n-career path.
lifetime, "television for women" warned them last year, but they refuse to listen. & men also have a biological clock. our sperm goes bad.
College for women was alright when it was maybe a half-year salary for 4 years, and they spent it working mostly on their MRS degree. Every female in my family for the last 3 generations has a college degree, and only 1 one of them was fool enough to graduate without her MRS.
The problem with Millennials is their mothers drank the equality kool-aid their entire life. So even where the moms internalized the lessons of the previous generations what they prattled on to their own children was toxic all around.
Gotta love government though. When we all pay for things together there becomes an approved age to have children (26-34), and an approved age to die (before 80). No doubt approved work, income, and consumption are just a few years away. Anything to turn everybody into drones.
Paraphrased from the first comment:
"I didn't save for retirement, I just bought a lottery ticket when I turned 55, won a million dollars and could afford to retire. All people should just enjoy their money and remember to buy a lottery ticket when they turn 55, like I did."
...Professor Geeta Nargund has also demanded that teenagers are taught about the dangers of delaying parenthood, because of the spiralling cost to the taxpayer of IVF for women in their late 30s and 40s.
Why is the state paying for IVF? If I were running things the state would only pay for fertility treatments for women under 35.
Parents must also be ready to offer grandparental support when needed. This is what allows non-Western women to have kids well looked-for and jobs too (it's a must, in a country with shit wages and unstable economy every able-bodied family member has to bring food to the table and SAHM is an option only for the richest). In the time before Industrial Age and forming of the nuclear family, mothers didn't care for children alone but relied on all their clan. Older women acting as nannies while young ones work in the field, care for cattle, spin and weave etc... it's the real traditional family.
Just think of it as evolution in action.
The problem should be largely self correcting in human perceivable timescales.
Ehh... In my country there was campaign to inform women about this.
White knights and women just hated it. They so much hate the truth.
And they hate women that have children in their 20s. Calling them sluts and other forms of low-life forms.
Males do have a genetic/repro bio-clock, runs much slower than that of women. But it's real.
OTOH, if God wants you to have a healthy baby, at whatever age, you will. Bible makes that clear. Also makes it clear that those are exceptional cases of direct intervention.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/about-fathers/201312/can-fathers-diet-affect-his-newborns-health
- it's not only about age, it seems.
Science refutes feminism. Again.
And they hate women that have children in their 20s. Calling them sluts and other forms of low-life forms.
That attitude should die out in a generation or two.
Well, it's a great way to self select right out of the gene pool. You see, narcissistic behavior and greed breed. Anyone who has bred livestock will tell you that temperament and character breed. We raised Rottweilers for years, and it was obvious. Humans are just the same. Folks, let those feminists dry up and shrivel.
"Women are perfectly aware of their body clocks. It's men that need the lessons."
Excellent point. Men do need to know that if they want children, they should marry a woman young enough to have those kids in her 20's.
Never marry a woman over 30.
That meme was thrown around a while back, but never took off. Maybe it's time to revive it.
It is women that hold back on having kids after marriage. Seldom do you hear of women that desire to have kids immediately after the marriage ceremony. They always want to wait a few years for any number of reasons like establishing a career, saving enough money, enjoying the married life without kids, going on vacation. I know cases where women wait until the goal is forgotten or they do lose their fertility. Women can't delay longer than a year or two.
It's hard to call it. Will there be more 35 year old barren wombs or 35 year old husbandless mothers in the coming decade? Women's lib sure did give them all a hell of a gift.
Husbands do delay child-rearing sometimes, but rarely when the wife wants to get on with it. A man's main fears on marrying are that his wife will get fat, and/or that she'll lose interest in sex. He knows that both those changes sometimes follow childbirth, and they could destroy his enjoyment of the marriage and turn it into a prison. Also, everyone he knows believes that the children always come first, then the spouse. He may even believe that. So once they have kids, even if she keeps her figure and her libido, he's going to drop down to #2 on her priorities list. He's quite likely to be neglected, or at least not be treated as her king anymore.
So if she says they should wait a couple years before having kids so they can save up and remodel a room for a nursery first, he's liable to go along, even if he wants kids. He's probably no more aware of the urgency of her aging eggs than she is, so he figures, "Yeah, that makes sense. We've got plenty of time, and it means I get to keep her to myself for that much longer."
In cases where the wife wants kids right away and the husband wants to wait, that's usually solved pretty quickly with an "oops" pregnancy.
I see your politically incorrect blog post and raise you one - reality is most of them are just too fat to conceive.
Never marry a woman over 25. If no one else has married them by then they're defective.
Fat women's opportunities for conception are less. As such they are the least likely to be on birth control in order to maximize their chances. Never raw dog a shamoo, even if you got blue balls.
I don't really understand the "husband isn't ready line". I technically wasn't ready (still getting my first business up and going), but I didn't care enough to slap a rubber on it after my wife told me she got off the pill. Perhaps I just absorbed the lesson, "If you wait for a good time to have kids, you won't have kids".
A warning that will of course fall on ears as deaf as those of the Helen Keller statue.
So once they have kids, even if she keeps her figure and her libido, he's going to drop down to #2 on her priorities list. He's quite likely to be neglected, or at least not be treated as her king anymore.
What woman treats her husband like a king... ever? I'm sure they must be out there, but I haven't seen it.
The above comments are why there'll never be vasalgel openly available. Feminists can't have men guarding themselves against oops moments and the government can't cope with the falling birth rate as it is, let alone if men could prevent impregnation until 30.
You gotta act like the King to be treated like the King, Eric.
It's good to be the King.
I don't see the point in the state paying for IVF in older women. Them being older makes them a poor candidate for IVF success and for parenting. And society can easily make of the population loss with cheaper and more fecund immigrants. Thus, since the cost is all she is worried about, and the cost is totally avoidable by just not paying it, her argument is invalid.
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