Thursday, January 8, 2015

She's off the drugs and high on life!

I always find it amusing when newspapers and magazines run the "she shows  him what he's missing" angle after a celebrity couple breaks up or divorces. In terms of sheer idiocy, it's right up there with the conventional post-rehab angle:
For most couples caught up in a divorce the prospect of dividing the property or making arrangements for the children are more than enough to worry about. But for surprising numbers of British couples one seemingly unlikely expense is being viewed as an essential part of the separation process - plastic surgery.

Divorce lawyers have noticed a marked increase in separations involving significant expense on cosmetic surgery including cases where the wife spends a significant slice of the initial settlement on treatments such as liposuction and breast enhancements.

One such firm, JMW Solicitors, based in Manchester, says it now handles dozens of such cases every year. The firm, which handles about 300 separations annually, calculates that between five and 10 per cent of its caseload over the last three years involved cosmetic surgery. In most cases, it was seen as part of the process of making a new start, but in a handful the motivation appeared to be "revenge", Sam Hall, a partner in family law at the firm said.
My take on this sort of thing is straightforward. If a woman is more interested in improving her appearance in order to try to hurt you than please you, you should get down on your knees and thank God, whether you believe in him or not, that you are no longer tied to such a wretched, petty, short-sighted creature. And the same thing holds true for men.

I often wonder if men and women would put the same time and effort into their marriages that they do in seeking to improve themselves in order to find a replacement mate post-divorce, if more marriages wouldn't succeed in the first place.


Bill Solomon said...

Or its a shit test on fed enforced steroids. And shell be back in 5 months. But maybe that's just my thing for crazy chicks that makes me think that's what love is.

Bob Loblaw said...

In my extended social circle a boob job is the absolute surest sign a couple is about to get divorced. They never wait until the papers are filed. That way the soon-to-be-ex has to pay for half the surgery.

hank.jim said...

@Eric. Why is the worry about paying half the surgery? When still married, he would pay for the whole surgery.

It is odd these surgeries are part of the divorce settlement. Men should be wise to refuse to pay for them or insist that their wives get them.

Anchorman said...

Any such surgery is bound to be short-lived. It was diet/exercise habits (or deliberate abuse of) that led to sagging and weight gain. Surgery is a temporary fix. See: Almost 90% of the people who have gastric bypass surgery (my SWAG, and I'll accept any research to correct the number, but it's my experience that the weight returns in two years or less).

It's more symbolic of the effort the individual wanted to put into the marriage.

"I won't put in the effort for you, but I'll slap a couple coats of paint on for the next guy/gal. Then, I'll find that unicorn!"

Modern medicine has done a tremendous amount of good, but I bet there were wise men from decades ago who tried to warn us about cosmetic surgery and the effect on women's psyche and divorce. They were likely brushed off by burgeoning feminists and white-knights, as well.

Harambe said...

I had a similar thought when there was a breakfast cereal ad doing the rounds a couple of years ago. This chick was complaining how her boyfriend wasn't interested in her anymore. She was a bit overweight and dressed like a cat lady. Then, she starts eating Special K and dressing like a slut. The ad ends by showing her grinding on her new boyfriend.

So I thought to myself, why didn't she dress like that and lose those 5 pounds for her current man? And does she really think her new boyfriend is going to be any different when she regresses into her frumpy catlady mode?

Anchorman said...

Reminds me of the cartoon from a year or so ago.

It showed how women dress for her husband vs. co-workers.

What's interesting is that when I brought this up to my sister and brother-in-law, my sister saw my point right away, though she's always been a fairly open-minded person. My BIL brushed it off. He's much older and I don't expect him to change. I also sincerely doubt he'd face frivorce. Maybe the eventual frigid wife syndrome, but he's courting that himself.

Anonymous said...

My niece kinda did this. Her husband was the cheater. Well, actually, he proposed that she accept his girlfriend (also married and mother of two) as part of their marriage. My niece didn't go for it. After divorce, she returned her breasts to pre-baby state, with enhancement, via surgery. She never said so much, but revenge may have been a bit of her motivation.

Anonymous said...

Seems an obvious effort to increase their market value when they were unwilling to do so for the ex.

Trust said...

When a woman it only concerned with her appearance when she isn't married, that tells a lot about the true reasons she marries.

Hint: she isn't marrying for the relationship, but for resources.

PhantomZodak said...

i dumped a girl got she didn't lose weight after she got fat. then she insisted on returning some of my stuff in person to show me "what i was missing" after she lost weight. but it just reinforced that i made the right decision. she could lose weight, she just didn't want to lose it for me. she'll just get fat again with the next guy.

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