I've never heard a woman express any genuine concern for the nice guy whose heart she's just broken, only for the pain she feels at having had to inflict pain upon the poor guy. In general, if a woman causes pain to a third party, one is not expected to express sympathy for the third party, but rather for how bad causing that third party pain must make her feel. Except, of course, in that the degree of the pain being caused reflects positively upon her desirability.
Good: "He'll probably never get over losing a woman as wonderful as you."
Better: "There is no way he'll ever land another woman as beautiful as you."
Best: "You definitely did the right thing. But ending a relationship like that must be really hard for you."
Bad: "You know, dumping him out of the blue like that really hurt him badly."
Worse: "One day, he'll realize that the pain he's feeling now is a small price to pay for not having to put up with you anymore."
36 comments:
Women feel bad for themselves???
I figured they would blame the guy for his Oedipus complex which is causing her to have those icky feelings.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-7zMsu4jXA
Just wanted to share with you guys the power an Alpha has on women around him.
Egad. Some girls have no pride.
(And yes, the 4th panel only detracts)
The last panel isn't especially realistic either, since it implies a high level of conscious, verbalized self-awareness.
In reality she'd just be lying there kind of squirming, feeling somewhat smothered and dissatisfied, sure intuitively that the cuddly lil guy was the cause of the dissatisfaction but unsure of herself because she also likes his quasi-feminine nature on some level. This internal tension would be resolved in some out-of-the-blue bitchy remark or fight-pick that leaves the poor bastard going WTF???
Comics like this make me really wish I could hop in a Delorean, go back 10 years, and kick my own ass.
http://youtu.be/ES72FcKnnts
Semi Related, hilarious breakdown of an 80s teen movie with commentary on the betaness of the main character
What would worst be?
The Mandrosphere continues to reinforce how blessed I am to be married to the woman I am. She is absolutely atypical. She is a good, Christian woman, none of Vox's Churchism to her at all.
Last guy I dated before my husband was what I would call a good man. I don't think of him as a beta, but, being female, what do I know. In my then 20-something perception, he seemed to me a safe guy and my prospective husband a bad boy. I did break up with "safe guy" to explore a possible relationship with my husband. I was told by mutual friends he was quite upset. However, being a wise person, he moved on and got married about the same time I did.
I stand a small chance of seeing him again. It's so long ago I'm sure it doesn't matter, but if it did I could say to him what I know now and knew then: You are lucky you didn't end up with me.
I suppose my motivation could be to look better to him. Why would that matter if it's just between he and I, but I suppose, being female, I don't understand my own motivation.
Perhaps the best route would be to smile politely and if any conversation ensued, for me to ask about him, his family and work, and leave him in peace as quickly as possible.
Any thoughts?
Any thoughts?
Go lay your husband.
If she's prettier than you, he already knows. If she isn't, don't say "You're lucky you didn't end up with me" It's condescending and you're just saying it to make yourself feel better.
"Perhaps the best route would be to smile politely and if any conversation ensued, for me to ask about him, his family and work, and leave him in peace as quickly as possible." I like this option
It's not easy to feel sympathy when the target of sympathy is really a lesser form of human being, as is the case with lower gammas and deltas. The woman is also ashamed, and greatly so, for ever having associated with a guy like that.
Would it be alpha to say, "One day, he'll realize that the pain he's feeling now is a small price to pay," and just leave it at that? Small price to pay. Period, nothing else, maintaining eye contact. I know a guy, not me, who I've heard say stuff like that. The listener usually reads into it what he or she wants but maybe later realizes, 'wait, he didn't actually validate my parking on that one; might even have a completely different opinion...'
I suppose my motivation could be to look better to him. Why would that matter if it's just between he and I, but I suppose, being female, I don't understand my own motivation.
Your motivation is because you want him to reveal that he's pining for you, that his wife is nothing compared to you, and that he is still carrying a torch for you.
Perhaps the best route would be to smile politely and if any conversation ensued, for me to ask about him, his family and work, and leave him in peace as quickly as possible.
The best route would be to be polite, to tell him that he looks good, you're pleased that life has treated him well, and leave him in peace as quickly as possible.
I love ladies, but, my goodness they are worse than termites in their persistent belief that they are entitled to all wood without consequence.
Yeah, AW, you know what to do. Just do everyone a favor, and actually do it.
RE: the cartoon:
I'd tell her: "Thanks for waking up another man to the true nature of women."
I'd tell him... go to Roissy's... read... learn... never have this happen again.
It's hard for me to get on board bashing women because they do what they do, have always done, and will always do. As I have said, if you have a great woman, solid, steady, and yours... Or if you keep getting dumped, divorced, tossed (save in a few instances, and circumstances such as a job that means you are gone often)... you only... have yourself to thank.
I truly have never had a problem with women. Give them, take them, leave them alone, it's really up to me. If I want a woman a certain way, I make her that way, consciously or not.
What makes me laugh is the guys who can think only of pussy. It isn't even half the reason I like and like to be with women. They are what they offer for very small fractions of the time you are with them. They are what they are ALL OF THE TIME! I truly enjoy what they are, little bitches and scamps, thieves and liars, cross my heart I thank God for the little nuisances they are and provide every single day, even while I choose to be alone at the moment.
Yeah, I know, I've gone through... phases on this. But as I wake up in the world, I am... putting it all together, tabulating, remembering, and... coming to a more cohesive answer(s) and solution sets.
Just... saying.
I've been single all 30 years of my life, no desire to marry and even less of a desire to get pregnant and raise children. Being a true tomboy means I'm shunned by women and befriended by men. As it is, my friends are like my family...I'd literally die for any one of them. If one told me he'd had a girl say such a cruel, heartless thing she would find herself in a world of hurt.
I'd tell my friend to be thankful that she revealed herself for the bitch she was though. Only thing worse than finding out the girl you love is a frigid harpy, is finding out AFTER you've put a ring on it.
I'm so happy I am the way I am, and have a boyfriend of 8 years who appreciates a self reliant, male brained woman. Truly, happiness doesn't require stifling gender roles or a certificate. It requires open communication, honesty and love.
VD: Your motivation is because you want him to reveal that he's pining for you, that his wife is nothing compared to you, and that he is still carrying a torch for you.
No doubt his wife is better than I and he knows it. So why did I have that particular imagined conversation? I'm embarrassed by my behavior then. I would like to look better to him, and to readers here on behalf of womankind perhaps. And, I'm embarrassed by my behavior to even have posted the question here, again revealing my self-focus.
Beau's advice is the obvious option I didn't see (being so wrapped up in me) and my full intention when I do see my husband again at the end of the month (he's been working out of state since Jan. 3).
If I do see this ex again, I'll try to avoid him seeing me. If we do see one another, I'll smile politely. If he engages in conversation, I'll take VD's advice and focus on him, then leave him in peace.
According to this Atlantic article, modern American women feel ashamed for wanting romantic relationships with men.
Free Northerner's analysis is here.
Keep in mind that The Atlantic isn't some manosphere blog -- this is a mainstream publication, writing something that looks like it came from Roissy.
Women have too many options now, period. 100 years ago they married young and hot and stayed with a man, or starved, froze to death or were eaten by bears.
Women have too many options now, period. 100 years ago they married young and hot and stayed with a man, or starved, froze to death or were eaten by bears.
Women were eaten by bears in 1913? I never knew that.
Women were eaten by bears in 1913? I never knew that.
It was a little known side effect resulting from the ocean being poisoned by the linoleum on the grand staircase of the Titanic.
The bears went absolutely insane from the resulting global warming.
(To Men:) If a woman (maybe your wife, but for this ANY) came up to you, had some kind of instant push-button pole which popped up in front of you while she disrobed, then proceeded to dance, would you not be aroused and attracted?
Women have something parallel, even more effective, just not identical. That is what Game and Alpha is about. The "high-status" confident male appears, and causes the same effect as the pole cat above.
Men have trouble (solipsism too) understanding women are intuitive, emotional, and internal instead of direct and visual. But when men act in just the right way which is detailed at CH, here, and other places, it is to women the complimentary action of what would be to men a half-naked disrobing woman with long hair and insta-pole. Irresistible.
Because it isn't as vulgar, the church accepts femporn. It ought not. Men are simple so the harm minimal. Women are corrupted more profoundly.
@anon There are no shortage of men who would desire to rent, or if necessary purchase, an traditional bear. At least if it is less expensive than a chest freezer.
Women tend to use the agony of good men and husbands as advertisement of their quality to men they are attracted to. She attributes his agony to how great of a loss she is as opposed to how cruel of a person she is.
"Women don't feel bad for anyone but themselves when they drop a nice Delta or Gamma who treats them well in favor of a manipulative bad boy who treats them poorly."
And more than a few of those "manipulative bad boys" that women are jumping to used to be the kind of "nice Deltas" that they're dumping, before they woke up to the truth about what women really want from men.
Exhibit A: Tupac...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzfNl0QxIwE
I do think women tend to treat men as THINGS rather than as actual humans with actual feelings that matter...but I wonder, is their attitude really any different toward other women. How deep to the solipsism go?
It's hard to tell, because women are usually very very good at projecting more "caring" then they actually feel.
The comic contains a falsehood: it is unlikely the woman would even bother cuddling up to this delta or gamma, or feel any sympathy for the damage done whatsoever. I've always been of the opinion that they don't just rule out sexual relationships with men of lower perceived value -- they actively despise them. They are creeps, failures, mockeries of men in their eyes -- regardless of their other achievements and abilities. Deep down, women don't just decide not to mate with these men, they don't even want to be around them (unless it is to taunt them and tease them with that which they cannot have). On other words, the only attention a man is likely to get in this situation is a sort of half-conscious emotional torture.
On a macro level, this seems to support the idea of feminism as women overvaluing themselves. No man is good enough for the feminist. All are to be despised.
@ Sprite
I think that's certainly true for the Jezebelers and other femcunts, but not most women in general, really. Most women like deltas and gammas OK as co-workers and neighbors, and perhaps even friends (without benefits obviously).
Doom, you know the answer to this--you are a natural alpha and display a natural alpha's attitude toward women. All this stuff is illustrative of, and for the benefit of, gammas and deltas going through the paroxysms that come with the swallowing of the red pill.
Women as you know them are not the women these have been lead to believe in. It is a painful process, and it takes time to reach a new equilibrium.
Hmmm, so, some one has conveniently forgotten to notice something here.
Delta and beta, whatever you wanna call them, guys are always going after alpha females. You know, the kind who are only in it to win it, if you know what I mean. They complain about how self-serving and uncaring these girls that they spend their days hopelessly chasing after are. After they have been cruelly dumped, they immediately go into the "I'm too much of a nice guy, I must become macho and ALPHA to get these alpha girls!"
This is all well and good for you all, except, you know, you completely ignored the delta and beta girls. They were not even on your radar. And you wonder why they want to be alpha girls. You never notice them until they are.
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