Here’s what I’m going to do: From now until the end of 2013 (and backdating to January 1st) when the Racist Sexist Homophobic Dipshit in question posts an entry on his site in which he uses my name (or one of his adorable nicknames for me), I’m going to put $5 into a pot. At the end of the year, I’m going to tally it up. All the money, up to $1,000, will be donated equally to the following organizations:Now, I'm quite happy to help the poor gay little black girls to the contents of Mr. Scalzi's wallet and thereby do my own little bit for charity. I certainly wouldn't want them to lose out on ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS by failing to play my part. But that's of little import, what is much more interesting is the way that this latest gambit further illustrates what I've been saying about how the gamma handles conflict.
*Human Rights Campaign
Now, what this means is that, since I don’t want to have to read the Racist Sexist Homophobic Dipshit’s site, I’ll need someone to monitor the dude’s site, and keep a spreadsheet for me. So I’m calling for volunteers. I will compensate you with signed first editions of The Human Division and The Mallet of Loving Correction when they come out, plus I’ll donate $250 in your name to go into the pot (on top of the up to $1,000 I will donate) to be disbursed to the organizations above. Email me with your interest.
As noted above, I’m backdating this to the first of the year, so the Racist Sexist Homophobic Dipshit in question has already caused money to go to each of these organizations. Well done him! I am sure he’s delighted to be helping to advance the causes of equality for women, gays and people of color, as well as funding an organization dedicated to helping those victimized by sexual assault. And each time he posts an entry that invokes me, one way or another, that’s another fiver into the pot. That’s 200 opportunities this year for him to prompt a contribution! I hope he takes advantage of all of them.
First, note that he refers to the situation as a "problem". This is directly contrary to the stance he has publicly been taking until now, which was the unconvincing pretense that he was enjoying the conflict. This is good, in that it shows he knows he cannot credibly continue to hide behind a facade of feigned pleasure, unfortunately, he still isn't willing to admit the extent to which his pride and his sensitivities have been wounded, much less how he is in over his head. He hasn't been able to fully take the first step, but his foot is in motion and that is a nominally positive development.
Second, he has finally begun to grasp that he is powerless and that his actions mean nothing to me. "Whether I ignore him or not doesn’t matter, so fine. I might as well get something productive out of it." This, too, is indicative of a degree of progress in escaping his self-constructed alternate reality. Remember, the opinion of others matters greatly to the gamma. They find it hard, very hard, to imagine that the same is not necessarily true of those higher in the hierarchy. John might still think I'm crazy to be so indifferent to the opinion of a whole hopping host of rabbits, but crazy or not, he is finally beginning to understand that this is, in fact, the case.
Third, he is still clinging to some illusions. As NateM said: "He REALLY doesn't get you..." The gamma never understands the ALPHA. John has begun to grasp that his actions mean nothing to me, but he hasn't fully accepted that they truly mean nothing to me. He can donate all of the royalties he received from his books in 2012 to those four charities or go off and fight for the Taliban in Afghanistan; it makes absolutely no difference to me.
Fourth, he's still not being entirely honest. Does anyone believe that he truly hopes I take advantage of all 200 of them? Does anyone believe this will be the last time we see any reference, however veiled, to the adorable RSHD?
Fifth, he's also still fighting in that inimitable passive-aggressive gamma style. This is the appeal to the crowd. "Look what a good person I am! Isn't it terrible that he keeps hitting me? Won't you please take my side?" The rush of his fellow rabbits to affirm his goodness and what they mistakenly see as the brilliance of his gambit obscures, for the moment, that all he has managed to do is insure that they are out a collective
Lest you be confused as to the real purpose, consider the following comment, which explains why the rabbits think their Chief Rabbit's latest hop is a brilliant one: "Yeah, that’s kinda the whole point of this subversive little enterprise. It works like the bumper stickers that announce plans to eat two animals for ever one animal veggies don’t. It gives the RSHD the power to stop tens of thousands of dollars in donations to causes to which he objects, and all he has to do is show restraint. If he doesn’t, it demonstrates that he cares more about blowing hot air than about his supposed principles."
It's all about the appeal to the audience with rabbits. It always is.
Sixth, those who have suggested that I respond in some similar manner have demonstrated their own inability to understand the socio-sexual dynamics here. Why would I respond to something so ludicrously irrelevant? Does anyone really believe that a $10 million donation to the NRA would bother Mr. "I am a rapist" one-ten millionth as much the knowledge that he has been quoted, again, by me and others around the Internet? The ALPHA response to someone saying "go ahead, punch me again, I dare you" is to call the bluff and punch him again.
Seventh, I have absolutely no doubt that wallowing in the warmth and welcome reassurance of the warren is much more fun for the gamma than the Super Bowl.
Eighth, lest you have any doubt whatsoever of my identification of the Chief Rabbit as a gamma, consider this comment: "It seems to me that John’s new approach is a really astute response to this particular instance of bullying because it changes the frame. Ignoring the bully gives him free rein and has caused him to escalate. Trying to argue or justify yourself in the face of deliberate malice is obviously counter-productive. But raising money off the bully’s comments changes the game entirely."
That's right. I'm not a critic. It's not a serious matter of genuine ideological disagreement. It's just simple bullying... which is an interesting admission of the perceived power dynamic here.
And finally, there is this: "And if this idea of yours of turning the RSHD’s insane vendetta into support for causes he hates doesn’t make his head explode, I don’t know what will!"
This reminds me of the Far Side cartoon. Same planet, different worlds. Suffice it to say, my head is not exploding. It is merely shaking slowly, from side to side, in awe, at the comedy that is Man.
By the time this ends, presumably sometime around the year 2021, I expect the rabbits will be offering money directly to me as tribute. Isn't it remarkable the lengths to which a gamma will go in his desperation to avoid the risk of being beaten in a fair fight in front of everyone?