Thursday, February 7, 2013

The evil that men do

The 11th Commandment, according to Churchianity: Thou shalt not spend thy free time with thy friends, playing games, or in any other activity displeasing to thy wife:
I know a young man who married in the last five years. He loves his new wife very much, and they’re having fun setting up their rental house, putting some money away, and desperately trying to finish their education part-time.

They did everything right: they dated for a while, they waited until they were married to make love, they got to know each others’ families. They’re not rushing into parenthood until they have a house and their education completed. But they’re on track to have that well before they’re 30.

There’s just one problem: whenever she’s at work, and he’s not, he heads over to his old house that he shared with a bunch of friends and plays video games. In fact, sometimes when she is home he still heads over there. He’s at work when he’s supposed to be at work. He’s at church when he’s supposed to be at church. He’s at school when he’s supposed to be at school. But much of his free time is spent playing these games, often at a buddy’s house. And his new wife is sick of it.
Men have to understand that women have a natural instinct to control others.  It is part of their maternal instinct.  But although it is natural, it is not appropriately applied to the head of the household; giving into that instinct may be easier, but will inevitably lead to unhappiness on the part of both parties.

The irony, of course, is that this woman likely spends more time staring at the television set than her husband does playing games. 

"Females across all age categories watched more TV than males, with the 50+ demographic leading at more than 215 hours per month."

Note that this guy would have to spend 7 hours and ten minutes playing games every single day just to reach the average amount of time being spent by the older women who make up the majority of the modern American church.  Have you ever heard a Christian leader decry the amount of time women spend watching television?

Now, obviously some men do spend too much time playing games.  If you're not taking care of your responsibilities, then you need to readjust your priorities.  It happens to everyone from time to time, so if that's the case, make the adjustment.  But never accept any attempt from anyone to dictate how you spend your free time; a woman has no more right to demand that you spend the evening in front of the television with her than you have to insist that she play four hours of coop Battlefield 3 with you.

This leads me to a thought that women might do well to keep in mind: the fact that a man is not bitching about an activity and is perhaps even enjoying it does not mean that it is something that he actually wants to do.  Just appreciate the fact that he's willing to participate in your interests, don't try to weasel out by pretending that it's his interest too if he never does it when you're not around.

74 comments:

Trust said...

"Men have to understand that women have a natural instinct to control others."

Men (and wiser women's who care to learn) should also understand it's in women's nature to accuse men of being controlling of them at the precise moment they are trying to control men.

Trust said...

I wonder how she'd like him to try to stops her from spending countless hours marinating herself in Twilight or 50 Shades of Pathetic. Bet she'd think his control was the problem and not her actions. Pot meet kettle.

Ian Ironwood said...

Heh. He can't go out . . . he should "break" the television.

From time to time all men need to uncouple from their lives and refresh themselves from the well of masculinity, in the company of other men. Absent any other responsibilities, she's really got no right to bitch about his social life. Would she prefer he spend his free time at Hooter's, blowing their nestegg on a sophomore from Lansing?

This is the sort of thing you need to stand up for in a marriage, Gentlemen. Within reason -- and a couple of times a week is completely reasonable -- there should be no issue.

The real issue isn't even that he's wasting time on video games. It's that he's doing stuff with his male friends, and she has no idea and no control over that time. One classic step on the road to Betacization is the inevitable removal of the husband from his circle of male friends, as they are "bad" influences. He needs to establish his right to do this now, while he still can, or she's only going to go after it harder.

It's actually a wonderful opportunity to display some Alpha. Wonder what he's going to do . . .

SarahsDaughter said...

They did everything right

That's hilarious.

Shelia Gregoire is such a piece of work. In one part of her advice she says God convicted her that she was wasting her life watching t.v. yet her advice to the woman is "Don’t “win him without words”, because that won’t work in the case of video games." Nope. God can't talk to a guy playing video games. Never gonna happen.

Another "boys are dumb, throw rocks at them" post by a femtard.

Trust said...

My wife once played bunko with some girlfriends on the same night I played poker with male friends. The women ganged up on my wife saying they would never let their husbands play poker bc men get in trouble. My wife pointed out.the.hypocrisy of the bunko group to no avail, with the women saying their friendships are different.

Indeed they are. My wife came home with TMI about the women's sex lives and their partners techniques and penises. I came home having learned that *gasp* who my friends favorite football teams were. Oh wives pleases save us.

Abigail said...

As the wife of a gamer, I do have to say that being unhappy about "sometimes when she is home he still heads over there," sounds really fishy, like it's not very often at all. He should just let her know in advance when he's planning to go over for the evening (and let her know in advance when he wants to spend time with her). Manage her expectations in advance so that she knows that every Tuesday (or whatever) is Guys Game Night, and she won't build up expectations for what they'll do together that night. Maybe she could go over and cook for them all once in a while, too.

Tom said...

My wife and I like to play games together.

Anonymous said...

No mention of how the games teach him to objectify and beat women? I guess they are saving that for a different article.

Tom said...

Board games and such you know.

GAHCindy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
GAHCindy said...

Maybe I should have left that comment at Sheila's blog. Hmmmm.

Toddy Cat said...

"Just appreciate the fact that he's willing to participate in your interests, don't try to weasel out by pretending that it's his interest too if he never does it when you're not around."

Words of wisdom, Sensei...

Will Best said...

They must teach them to hate video games at some point. I used to have a video game hobby that took about 1/2 the time and 1/5th the cost of my current hobbies and my wife is happier now with my diversions than she was previously.

tz said...

Solipsism. Men need different kinds of recreation and unwinding. Last generation went hunting or fishing. I go out on my Harley for long stretches of road and time. Others do or watch sports. Men unwind and recharge with mentally active but otherwise pointless stuff.

In a marriage, both have to sacrifice their egos. Just because one spouse dislikes something means nothing except an opportunity to show sacrifice by accepting it (as long as it isn't objectively sinful).

I'm sure the husband in the letter would come up with a large deficit if he was asked to play tax-auditor as to his wife's time.

Feh said...

My buddy's wife HATES him playing video games in the house. She made him take the TV and the console into the garage. No frigging way would I put up with that. I paid for this house, I'm damn well going to play games in it whenever I want to.

Kind of unclear why the guy has to go anywhere to play video games. Why can't he do it at his house?

Cail Corishev said...

It's funny how intentionally putting off children until your 30s is now called "doing everything right," and it probably wouldn't occur to most people to object to that at all, or that this is a huge sea-change from just a couple generations ago.

Josh said...

This comment sums up the churchian view of men and their role:

I get so frustrated that this issue is so frequently dumped on the ‘wives’ as an issue we should just learn to deal with, tolerate, and even ‘join in’ with. PA-LEESE!!!! According to recent studies the average “gamer” is now a 30 year old male. I have a few things to say to all these 30 year old gamers, especially if they are married with children. (Like my husband, and I’ve shared these thoughts with him a few times  ) “GROW UP.” “The teenage years are gone, your glory days are over! You are missing out on the best years of your life all for the love of a fake game, where you are a fake solider, fake coach, fake athlete, or fake ‘bad guy’. You’re teaching your kids that there is nothing more important that escaping your life and being entertained, all in the name of ‘relaxing’ or ‘unwinding.’ Husbands are not called to “unwind” they are called to be ministers and servants to their wives and children. The ride home from work is their time to ‘unwind.’ Listen to your sports talk then. When you get home, you get to join your wife in taking care of the home and children as a pastor servant.

Cail Corishev said...

They must teach them to hate video games at some point.

Except for the social games like Farmville, video games are pretty much a guy thing. But it does seem like there's a special hate reserved for them that goes beyond that for other guy things like fishing or building motorcycles. Hmm.

I once had a live-in girlfriend get furious because I would sit on one side of the room at my computer while she sat at the other and watched TV. I asked if it would be better if we sat -- still apart in separate recliners -- and watched TV, not talking to each other, just focused on the TV. She said yes. That may have been the last rational conversation I tried to have with her.

Crusader Corim said...

A man needs to not put up with that, and make her join you in your hobbies, including gaming.

My wife plays games with me when she wants to share my gaming time. And yes, we have kids too.

Cail Corishev said...

"Husbands are not called to “unwind” they are called to be ministers and servants to their wives and children. The ride home from work is their time to ‘unwind.’"

Wow. It's not often you get to see the beast in broad daylight like that. Remember, guys: your ride home from work is your only respite. I guess the lesson is to work as far from home as possible.

Josh said...

I think that women hate video games because it's something that men are interested that isn't them.

And, if you're a woman, how interesting are you really if your husband would rather play black ops, halo, or Madden than hang out with you? Given that women tend to drastically overrate their own personalities, this threatens their self constructed reality.

And, if you really want him to spend time with you rather than with Leroy Jenkins, put on some lingerie,send the kids to bed, and, well...if you need help from there, it's pretty obvious why he's spending do much time playing games.

taterearl said...

Women don't want men to relax or be happy...because they really have no idea how to do those things.

Doom said...

Uhrm, that's why you don't wait to have kids. First of all, that is a fools errand. It mean she wants two and a half pets, and probably the guy too. If you want that, go for it, but then don't bitch about living in her unnatural world. Give them one, then three, then five kids, and they will be glad to see you, the biggest kid she has, getting out the door!

Or... fuck her.

taterearl said...

"Husbands are not called to “unwind” they are called to be ministers and servants to their wives and children. The ride home from work is their time to ‘unwind.’"

Like Chris Rock said...

"You ever notice how no man comes home straight from work? No man comes home straight from work. A man get off work, he got to go somewhere. He got to drink something, he got to smoke something...he got to watch the game, he got to hang with his boys...he got to take a drive. He got to do something that will mentally prepare him...for all the talking he gonna hear when he get home."

Trust said...

" I have a few things to say to all these 30 year old gamers, especially if they are married with children. (Like my husband, and I’ve shared these thoughts with him a few times ) “GROW UP.”"
_________

That's what I think of married women who have read or watched all things twilight, got excited about 50 shades of pathetic, or watches soap operas wishing her man was more like the fictional male characters.

Pepper said...

Here is an example of useful female solipsism:

Isn't it in the wife's best interest to help her husband re-charge his batteries? Isn't a contented husband a good husband?

stg58/Animal Mother said...

Josh is right about women being jealous of video games and the attention we lavish upon them.

Women get upset when they sashay into a room full of men that are usually pursuing them and all she gets is a half grunt. She got even more indignant when she asked to play, and then became little more than fodder for our kill counts.

Getting the "Killtacular" ain't easy.

Anonymous said...

"She pulls her punches because she's afraid women won't listen to the flat-out truth. And she's probably right. I hope I never care that much whether my readership will stick around, personally, but I guess I understand on an emotional and financial level."

That sounds familiar.....

deti

Anonymous said...

"Husbands are not called to “unwind” they are called to be ministers and servants to their wives and children. The ride home from work is their time to ‘unwind.’"

Well, no, dear wife; you do not get to decide how and where I should unwind.

I especially liked the scare quotes around the word "unwind". Really gets to the root of the matter.

deti

A said...

This post definitely resonates with me. My wife likes to spend her free time watching tv. I have never really seen her do anything else with her free time other than surf facebook, and the things she dreams about doing in her free time is to sit on a patio drinking wine. I have very limited interest in any of those things, and I spend my free time learning, reading, playing games, working out, or writing.

Needless to say, my wife and I have had several arguments when she wants to watch tv with me and I want to do something else. She wants me to spend time with her, which means watching tv, and I don't always want to watch tv, even if it means I'm not going to end up spending time with you. It can be frustrating, especially when you live in a tiny apartment where you can't get away from the noise of the tv (with a cpu you can put on headphones). I just wish my wife had something, anything, she could do around the place other than fb/tv.

Kyle In Japan said...

I find it remarkable that video games get so much hate when they require far more engagement, thinking, and effort than watching TV, wasting time watching cat videos on Youtube, or watching a Lifetime Original Movie.

Anonymous said...

kyle:

yeah. Video games get the bad rap because it is something that teenage boys like doing. For many, the video game pastime is something those teen boys retain as they age into their 20s and 30s. The video game pastime also tends to be something many of these boys get good at. For many of them, it's just about the only thing they were ever accepted into.

deti

Miserman said...

I think that women hate video games because it's something that men are interested that isn't them.

It is assumed that everything a man does he does with his wife in mind. From work to home to church he does what he does because of his wife. However, the 5% of his time spent playing video games is time that his mind is not on her.

Oh, the humanity (sarcasm).

The Next to Last Samurai said...

215 hours? That's incredible. I'm 53, female, and it's rare that I can find 215 minutes of worthwhile programming per month. I wonder what in the world these ladies are finding to watch?

Brad Andrews said...

I am not so sure she softpeddles things merely for the money. She had a reasonable statement of "try playing with him" in the base posted, but then quickly backpeddled when the echo chamber went into "video games are an evil addiction."

No allowance after the base post in most of the comments for legitimate video game playing. I agree that TV is often women's vice of choice. And it may not always be "bad" shows. It could be Food Network shows, but it still can waste a lot of time.

Brad Andrews said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cail Corishev said...

Video games get the bad rap because it is something that teenage boys like doing.

Ah, that answers my question earlier of why video games are hated more than other male-centric hobbies like fishing or motorcycles. Those are seen as men's hobbies, while video games are supposedly for boys, so the offense is doubled: he's doing his own thing, and being boyish at the same time.

pdwalker said...

My buddy's wife HATES him playing video games in the house. She made him take the TV and the console into the garage. No frigging way would I put up with that. I paid for this house, I'm damn well going to play games in it whenever I want to.

Feh,

You should tell your buddy to walk right up to his wife and ask for his balls back

Oh wait, I guess that is the heart of the problem.

Trust said...

"Video games get the bad rap because it is something that teenage boys like doing."
________

One could ssay Twilight gets a bad rap because it is something teenage girls like doing.

Ladies, who are you? Pot or kettle?

mmaier2112 said...

Any woman that bitches about XBox over TV is a bitchy moron.

There's nothing to discuss. TV SUCKS! There is nothing worth watching on, network or cable.

Folks think I am nuts because I do not have cable or even a HD antenna hooked up to my TV.

Why?

Cuz TV sucks, that's why.

I watch football and baseball outside my house as a social activity. That's it.

Someone, please... enlighten me. Exactly what am I missing?

Amateurs singing on "The Voice"? "Home improvement shows"? Rednecks catching pests? Guidos porking Guidos? Skanks selling themselves on ABC with roses?

Nope. No thanks. Piss off. You can have it all.

Video games give me drama, heroism, conflict and resolution. Better written and more fun than anything on TV (not hard).

God PLEASE give me another woman that loves me enough to play videogames on Friday night instead of going out and wasting money.

I'd rather practice ballroom dancing 2 hours a night than endure television. At least that's foreplay and exercise.

Josh said...

Ladies, who are you? Pot or kettle?

Dat's sexiss!

Josh said...

Dude...the redneck critter shows are awesome...

thewomanandthedragon said...

But much of his free time is spent playing these games, often at a buddy’s house. And his new wife is sick of it.

Someone call Alex and Stephen Kendrick. This *might* just be the story line for a sequel to Fireproof or Courageous.

ar10308 said...

"Someone call Alex and Stephen Kendrick. This *might* just be the story line for a sequel to Fireproof or Courageous."

We'll call it "Respawn".

Toby Temple said...

Ah! The drama from playing video games.

There are those who would address this by teaching their gfs/wives how to play the game.

What do you guys think about this solution?

Badger said...

"Wow. It's not often you get to see the beast in broad daylight like that. Remember, guys: your ride home from work is your only respite. I guess the lesson is to work as far from home as possible. "

It is, indeed, amazing to see when the other side lets the veil and cloak slip and you see their true colors. I realized early in my Manosphere days that when push came to shove, so many of even the ardent equalist feminist crowd would slip back into a "men should marry and be fathers and mow the lawn and paint the shed! The family (i.e. the feminine imperative) needs it, that's what men are FOR!"

It is disgusting to see wives frame their husbands as beasts of burden - not as people whose interests they care about per se as a result of the love they have built, but as mercenary resources to be plundered for maximal benefit.

Ian,

"The real issue isn't even that he's wasting time on video games. It's that he's doing stuff with his male friends, and she has no idea and no control over that time. One classic step on the road to Betacization is the inevitable removal of the husband from his circle of male friends, as they are "bad" influences. He needs to establish his right to do this now, while he still can, or she's only going to go after it harder. "

I would bet that many, MANY husbands hit this betatization pathway when the first kid arrives...after a period of total exhaustion from childbirth drama and the stresses of a young baby, the return to recreation can be stopped with a simple martyrdom exercise: "how dare you go out to see your friends when I'm stuck here taking care of YOUR child!"

I wrote about something like this a long time ago, regarding a woman who had decided she had replaced her husband with her son as the most important male in her life:

http://badgerhut.wordpress.com/2011/03/26/marriage-is-part-of-parenting/

Rollo Tomassi said...

From Compatibility:
https://rationalmale.wordpress.com/2011/12/15/compatibility/

You see, whenever a Man engages in any leisure activity, passion, hobby, etc. that doesn’t directly benefit his wife / GF it’s always perceived as a waste of time. If she cannot realize a tangible result that benefits her – or by way of her, the potential “family” or the “relationship” – your effort is pointless and frivolous in contrast to engaging her, entertaining her or relating with her. Again we see the hypergamous feminine imperative of girl-world. If it’s not directly benefiting women, it’s not benefiting humanity in general.

That said, you can stretch this association quite a bit. If you enjoy playing basketball after work with friends or hitting the gym, there is a benefit to her – your improved health, better looks, less fat, etc. so the “hobby” is more tolerable. There is a kind of hierarchy of leisure activities, hobbies, passions, etc. that women rank based on how it relates to themselves and the social perceptions that are associated with it. You could even make the case that playing X-Box helps you decompress after a hard day at work, but this is less tolerable than something that has tangible benefits or at least the association of benefits for a woman. You have to learn how to mediate this in an LTR.

Feh said...

Remember, guys: your ride home from work is your only respite. I guess the lesson is to work as far from home as possible.

Or, just stay at work. This can be framed as advancing your career for her benefit, rather than avoiding drudgery at home. I don't know how many times I've seen guys with new babies at home work longer hours... no doubt inspired by their desire to strive for the benefit of the new offspring, heh heh.

Needless to say, my wife and I have had several arguments when she wants to watch tv with me and I want to do something else. She wants me to spend time with her, which means watching tv, and I don't always want to watch tv, even if it means I'm not going to end up spending time with you.

Yeah, I had a boardgaming buddy whose wife made him watch TV with her (which bored the hell out of him) as the price he had to pay in order to play boardgames with me on the weekends.

As for the "she should play video games too" thing, I guarantee you that would be a joyless experience. She would hate it, and in doing so, would ensure that you didn't enjoy yourself either.

Athor Pel said...

"taterearl said...

Women don't want men to relax or be happy...because they really have no idea how to do those things."



This right here. I've met very few women that knew how to relax. They are wound tighter than they have a right to be.
They just can't let it go.

Wendy said...

As for the "she should play video games too" thing, I guarantee you that would be a joyless experience. She would hate it, and in doing so, would ensure that you didn't enjoy yourself either.

On the whole, women prefer different kinds of video games than men. Part of it is finding the right kind of game.

Athor Pel said...

I have theory. Women tend to like entertainment that they find easy to place themselves inside of. The closer to her reality it is the better she likes it.

Some examples,
If the story takes place on earth, in a cottage, on a scenic lane, then their imaginations are capable of placing themselves within that setting. They've seen something like that with their own eyes. It's real to her and therefore relevant.

If the story takes place on spaceships or other planets with alien ecosystems then they have never seen those things with their own eyes and therefore cannot imagine themselves in those places. Those types of settings hold no interest for them because of their failure of imagination. It's not real to her so it has no relevance.

It doesn't matter that both stories are equally fictitious. What matters is her ability or desire to place herself within the story's setting. I think this is one of those ubiquitous contradictions we find so often, the average woman engages the world through her, non-tangible, emotions, but yet tends to enjoy stories that most closely resemble her current or desired but possibly attainable material reality. Said another way, women are materialists that live in a world of emotion.

Even those girls that tolerate spaceships and alien environments in their entertainment appreciate the stories for different reasons than a guy would. They become much more involved in the relationships between the characters than a guy would. In fact this is the only hook a guy has for getting a girlfriend or wife interested in the fiction or games he might enjoy.

And those girls that have genuine tastes in entertainment that mirror what a guy would like, they have male patterned brains and are the exceptions among the girly girls.


Just to be plain about it,
Yes, I said a woman's dislike for certain types of the more outlandish fiction is a failure of imagination on her part.

Feh said...

On the whole, women prefer different kinds of video games than men. Part of it is finding the right kind of game.

Well yeah but I feel the same way about playing her chick game as she feels about playing my shoot-em-up. If I play her lame game for the sake of togetherness, then I still need to be left alone to play my shooter.

Anonymous said...

I couldn't resist ...

----------
I get so frustrated that this issue is so frequently dumped on the ‘husbands’ as an issue we should just learn to deal with, tolerate, and even ‘join in’ with. PA-LEESE!!!! According to recent studies the average “tv watcher” is now a 30 year old female. I have a few things to say to all these 30 year old gamers, especially if they are married with children. (Like my wife, and I’ve shared these thoughts with her a few times ) “GROW UP.” “The teenage years are gone, your glory days are over! You are missing out on the best years of your life all for the love of a fake drama, with fake characters. You’re teaching your kids that there is nothing more important that escaping your life and being entertained, all in the name of ‘relaxing’ or ‘unwinding.’ Wives are not called to “unwind” they are called to be ministers and servants to their husbands and children. The time in the shower is their time to ‘unwind.’ Otherwise you get to join your husband in taking care of the home and children as a minister servant.
---------

- Hortensio

DrTorch said...

Didn't strike me as the worst piece ever written.

Sheila did tell women to learn to be interesting, which is a big plus. She even suggested on thing was to start playing the games with their husbands. That's better than many women would approach the situation.

She also was emphatic about not being a nagging shrew.

I'm not big into video games, so maybe it's easier to be indifferent about them. Regardless of one's hobby

Eph 5:15-17 Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise,making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

Michael Maier said...

I've said it before, but there's not much sexier than your woman dropping two Hunters in the blink of an eye on "The Silent Cartographer" in Halo: CE on original XBox.

Which she did BEFORE I could order her around and set up a distraction for her to do the shooting. She just ran in and did it somehow.

Michael Maier said...

taterearl said...

"Women don't want men to relax or be happy...because they really have no idea how to do those things."

Probably far truer than not.

Anonymous said...

Women are stupid, immature, selfish pigs! If it weren't for sex no man would spend any time with them at all. The funny part is, women instincively know their only value to men is their bodies. They know men really don't care what they think or what they feel. They don't care about their "souls" (if they have one, right?!). Maybe that has something to do with the so-called "fitness testing" and trying to make sure they get something from the bargain. They can't make men care about more than sex...but they can try to get some kind of benefit for themselves: children, security and fidelity (so they don't have to grow old aone)

Mina said...

Why don't women have hobbies? Can you really classify TV watching as a hobby?

I have a bunch of hobbies most of them don't even involve spending money or going anywhere far.

And none of them involve looking at a screen. Well ok, one of them does - but only during troubleshooting, running diagnostics and booting.

Ioweenie said...

Men have testosterone; they're driven to perfect, conquer, & play very hard. Women have estrogen/progesterone; we're driven to nest, nurture, & know all are safe. For both men and women, these natural tendencies can lead to the need to maintain control and dominance.

Taking care of children 24/7 is taxing as hell, as is having full financial responsibility for the material provision of a family 24/7 - if you're LUCKY enough to have division of labor. Either way, it's just plain work/effort as we are so basically fundamentally different and thanks to the ills that resulted in feminization of society, women expect men to be like them; men don't give it a second thought until they're being bitched at and just chalk it up to bitches being bitches.

My husband has dominated the good TV for 25 years; I began to retreat to another to distract myself when my 16 year had a job that had him driving home late at night. Prior to that, I hadn't watched TV in over 25+ years and I can say, episodic television is a lot better than it used to be. Breaking Bad (A&E) is f-ing awesome, but I love good story-telling.

Ioweenie said...

Anonymous said...
Women are stupid, immature, selfish pigs! If it weren't for sex no man would spend any time with them at all. The funny part is, women instincively know their only value to men is their bodies. They know men really don't care what they think or what they feel. They don't care about their "souls" (if they have one, right?!). Maybe that has something to do with the so-called "fitness testing" and trying to make sure they get something from the bargain. They can't make men care about more than sex...but they can try to get some kind of benefit for themselves: children, security and fidelity (so they don't have to grow old aone)

Well said, whoever you are, except woman don't have a lock on the immaturity, stupid, selfish thing. We each do our share. But, true that a man doesn't give a rip about a woman beyond her provision of sex and care of offspring he hopes are his since he's slaving his ass off for them all - or at least, he should be (when he's not recreating/recharging). If he's not providing, he's a wuss who doesn't have much room to complain, unless she is, then . . . then . . . oh crap. Where does it end?

The Next to Last Samurai said...

Where'd that 215 hour statistic come from? It works out to slightly more or less than 7 hours a day, depending on the length of the month. Even if you like the programming, that seems awfully high. Although many Americans use TV as a sort of audible wallpaper; they have it on a lot but don't pay much attention.

Brad Andrews said...

@Tody

>There are those who would address this by teaching their gfs/wives how to play the game.

I have tried with my wife, but it is a largely futile exercise. She has no desire to do so, but has no trouble watching FoxNews or Food Network for hours....

She has long ago learned to not gripe about me playing games as it will not impact me. I get things done, I just like to play games far more than TV. In fact I rarely turn the one on (with an attached Tivo) right next to my computer.

@DrTorch
> She also was emphatic about not being a nagging shrew.

Only at the beginning. She rapidly distanced herself from that in the comments, noting it was fine to drop the bomb and noting that she was probably "too easy" on the guy in her base post.

I don't recall reading a peep about what the women wanted the guys to do with them instead of video games or even what the guys should be doing instead when the woman was working.

Redbane said...

"..,Have you ever heard a Christian leader decry the amount of time women spend watching television.."

Actually yes.Both the excessive watching of the "Devils Tabernacle" and playing of video games would indicate a certain degree of arrested development and intellectual malaise on the part of all concerned.I find the term "Christian" to be somewhat meaningless these days given the rainbow of opinion and diverse interpretation it now clearly represents.It is no longer a definitive word unless the context of commentary is quite focused.

Herman the German said...

VD wrote: a woman has no more right to demand that you spend the evening in front of the television with her than you have to insist that she play four hours of coop Battlefield 3 with you.

---AMEN, AMEN, AMEN, AMEN, AMEN!!!! Hell, I'll even throw in an "Allah huAckbar"....LOL. Really appreciate this post, Vox. Thank you!

Herman the German said...

Cail C. said re: "Husbands are not called to “unwind” they are called to be ministers and servants to their wives and children. The ride home from work is their time to ‘unwind.’"

Cail: Wow. It's not often you get to see the beast in broad daylight like that. Remember, guys: your ride home from work is your only respite. I guess the lesson is to work as far from home as possible.


---I purposefully took a job 32 miles away, when I was married to MY evil churchian videogame-hating shrew of an Ex wife. Started reading and internalizing in the Androsphere, left that awful feminized church, found non-western, non-feminized CHRISTianity, then wisely allowed her to dig her own hole through draconian ultimatums then eventually called her bluff when she cried "Divorce! I'm just not haaappy!!". Classic divorcee`; totally overestimated her SMV...she's still looking....and I'm swimming in it!! (apologize for the personal solipsism...LOL). Again, excellent comments. Thanks, All.

The One said...

It is true that a man should do something productive and not waste his time playing video games, but that call should be from G-d, not a women.

LP 999/Eliza said...

Sure, why aren't pastors criticizing the emo porn? It is because they actually promote, sell it in their cheap bookshops and worship it. Note the roses on the mothers day.

He is playing video games with his friends? How comforting and normal. Leave him alone, encourage the gaming and make him some snacks.

Trust said...

@LP 999/Eliza said... Sure, why aren't pastors criticizing the emo porn? It is because they actually promote, sell it in their cheap bookshops and worship it. Note the roses on the mothers day.
___________

True.

Years ago, my wife and I went to a church marriage class called "Love and Respect." It was very balanced. Same exact amount of time devoted to the male higher need (respect) as the female (love). In the book by the same name, same exact number of chapters geared to men as to women.

Yet, it is amazing how many women marched their husbands into the class assuming it was about showing love and respect to wives, and shocked to find out the were expected to give an not just get.

In fact, men did not much question the need to love their wives, but there was much head shaking an argument over the notion that a wife should respect her husband. (Note, by the same women who thought respect was wonderful when they thought the class was about respecting them.)

Sometimes, I wonder if feminism is the false religion of Revelation. I say that mostly in jest, but the shoe does seem to fit.


Anonymous said...

The solution to this is pretty simple.
Don't let her get away with it. Call her on it, inform her your going to hang out with your buds.

I still play and she reads with her head on my lap.

Haven't had a complaint since the first time she tried it. My wife's pretty good though. I had a former girlfriend who would't drop the bitch fits, too much work required.

Lokland

PS. Of course, all things in moderation. If you manage to log 215 hours per month, damn. I can;t even find that much time to sleep.

K_C said...

"Years ago, my wife and I went to a church marriage class called "Love and Respect." It was very balanced. Same exact amount of time devoted to the male higher need (respect) as the female (love)...
...In fact, men did not much question the need to love their wives, but there was much head shaking an argument over the notion that a wife should respect her husband. (Note, by the same women who thought respect was wonderful when they thought the class was about respecting them.) "

Yes, my wife and I attended this same seminar at our church. Really, I'd say it was my first taste of the red pill. "What? You mean I shouldn't be ashamed of my sexuality as a man?"
Light bulbs also went off on the whole issue of "respect" and how I respond to it as a man. Now ultimately I think the concept doesn't go far enough, but I give them credit for a *huge* step in the right direction. But, like you said, it's pretty amazing the head scratching and looks ranging from confusion to complete dismissal as my wife and I would relate the lessons to friends. The masculine concept of "respect is earned" is the only thing the feminized peoples could understand. Loving your wife simply *because* she's your wife was easy, respecting your husband simply *because* he's your husband made their heads explode.

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