How do you go about cultivating assertiveness with women? I attract a woman, date her a few times and at some point it always comes down to either I make some sort of move (kiss her etc) or it's done. I always feel like I need to ask permission to do so...you know how that ends. I DESPISE this and want to fix it... I just have no idea how.Let me explain by means of an analogy here. You're in a similar position to the guy who asks how to do a flip off the diving board who is afraid to jump off it. The problem is that no amount of coaching in proper diving technique is going to conquer the fear. The only way to conquer the fear is to be brave, which means doing what frightens you in the full knowledge that you're afraid. Until you have jumped off the board so many times that you become accustomed to it, your fear will prevent you from being able to pull off the flip.
Assertiveness comes naturally to some men, but not to most. So, it's usually a learned behavior, which is good news because it means that you can learn it. The first thing to do is to recognize your fear. When you start to tighten up and your heart begins to beat faster, that's a sign that you've triggered your fear. That's good, that's what you want. That's the point at which you have to simply jump off the board, trusting that the water will be there and that it won't hurt too much.
The great thing is that regardless of how it turns out, good or bad, it's almost never going to be anywhere nearly as bad as you feared. The monster in our imagination is almost always bigger than the real thing. So, test yourself. Each time you start tightening up and the fear begins to swell, do exactly the opposite of what will relieve the pressure. Every time you do this and successfully fight through the fear and act, you will reduce the amount of fear that will appear the next time. It will never disappear entirely, but it will become manageable and easily overcome.
And on a more specific note, never ask permission of a woman who doesn't have a material claim on you. She hasn't merited that right nor can you legitimately lay that responsibility on her. With women, it is almost always more effective to ask forgiveness than permission. And most of the time, since men are supposed to be the pursuers, she's waiting for you to make your move anyhow.
78 comments:
DD
The British SAS have an excellent motto that I've co-opted for my own life.
Who Dares Wins
Quit worrying about rejection, jam your tongue down her throat, cup her breast with one hand, and grab some ass with the other.
If she's not into it, move on to the next one.
"I attract a woman, date her a few times and at some point it always comes down to either I make some sort of move (kiss her etc) or it's done."
Your timing is off. It shouldn't be taking you a few dates to kiss. You should be making that move on your first date...at the very least when you drop her off at the end of your date. Earlier when you learn how to position the situation. One might position themselves for the first kiss in a multitude of ways. Distance and timing is always the key. Contact can be your clue. Whether it be physical or with the eyes.
This should be your personal mantra: I relax and enjoy life. I know whatever I need to know is revealed to me in the perfect time and space sequence.
Learn it...and live it.
"doing what frightens you in the full knowledge that you're afraid."
Aint that the truth.
You dont have to go all in at once. Do little things that scare you a little, until they do no more, and then bring it up a notch or several notches. Look for the calm in the middle of the storm - look for a place of comfort in the movement while you're at it.
"never ask permission of a woman"
That one you can bring the way all up. Never ask permission, period.
When you first meet her, she will spend the next 60 to 180 seconds, if that long, determining whether or not:
1) She wants you to kiss her
2) She might want you to kiss her
3) She absolutely does not want you to kiss her
You've already been prequalified for the loan. You've decided you can afford it. Limited time offer. Whatever you decide to do, do it on the first date, don't rack up interest rates and late charges by doormatting through a "few" dates.
Screw it up, get slapped and move on to the next one. Fail and fail spectacularly if you must, but don't fail by traipsing the poor girl through nice hell.
In fact, start your next first date with the kiss. At best, it will save you time and money. At worst, it will save you money.
If she went with you on a date she either wants you to fuck her (not necessarily that same date) or she's playing with you / not worth the time.
Kissing is for granted. She's expecting it.
Quit worrying about rejection, jam your tongue down her throat, cup her breast with one hand, and grab some ass with the other.
Woman's POV, so take it for whatever it's worth ... This is too sleazy. Unless, of course, the woman is a pig and you only want to pump and dump.
If you're dating a woman who isn't a pig, and see her as a long-term prospect, then a bold, but non-sleazy move is called for. If I'm attracted to the man I'm dating, I definitely want him to touch me and confidently go in for a kiss (without asking for permission). But full-on tongue with tush- and boob-grabbing as the opening move? Gross.
"It is better to ask for forgiveness than permission"
Old Jesuit saying
Drop the entire attitude and thought that has you requiring yourself to ask permission.
"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear."
Man's POV, so take it for whatever... I totally agree w/Stickwick. Regardless of how assertive I like to be (anywhere within the range of medium to a lot assertive, depending on my interests), that sort of flailing doesn't sound any fun at all to me, especially for the first physical encounter. It just seems desperate and gropey and out of control. It's a first date, not a wedding night - and even on a wedding night, if you've done things right, you'll be grabbing all those things just to keep her under some semblance of control...
Stickwick- Why so judgmental on your female sisters? Just because you may have never had a man knock your socks off with his sexual boldness doesn't make other women pigs if they've succumbed to it.Women are every bit as sexual creatures as men are. Spare me any nonsense that women don't enjoy being rubbed, grabbed, and caressed on the breasts, ass, and just about everywhere else on their bodies. And it's funny how you're splitting hairs in that post. You want a man to be bold and forward, but only according to your own standard of what is considered proper sexual etiquette. For the millionth time, men should NEVER listen to anything a woman has to say regarding relationships.
Go for it DD!There is no down side. Her interest in you will be qualified by her reaction instantly. Even if she is a chaste woman she may remove your hands from her jugglies and ass, but she won't disengage the kiss. Then you can continue to make the investment in her without wasting your time & money. And if she does pull away and slaps you or gives you a "How dare you" speech. Who cares. Move on to the next prospect. But I'll bet good money she'll not forget your boldness. You walk away a winner either way. Unless of course your moves aren't executed in a confident, non-awkward, manner. Frame is everything. Good luck!
Hear ye, Hear ye
Would the honorable Sir Daniel please make report to the olde jousting tent to prepare and defend thy ladies honor. Thy steed of white is awaiting thy mount.
Get real man!
You think the difference between a scenario in which a man confidently kisses and strategically touches a woman and one in which he goes full-on Humpy-the-Dog on her is splitting hairs?
Of course women are very sexual, and I definitely enjoy all of those things you mentioned and more -- but not on a first date. As Daniel said, it comes across as desperate and gropey.
If a woman responds positively to a man grabbing her privates and jamming his tongue down her throat on the first date, she's a PIG. But a lot of men are looking for that these days.
To "attack a straw man" is to create the illusion of having refuted a proposition by replacing it with a superficially similar yet unequivalent proposition (the "straw man"), and refuting it, without ever having actually refuted the original position.
Your Humpy-the-Dog line falls into this category perfectly.
And it's also amusing how predictable women are. Some white-knighter shows up and does his best Ray Romano to suck up to your response and immediately you've canonized his ridiculously stupid statement.
I should qualify that, since the question wasn't about what to do on the first date, but how to implement the first move. Grabbing privates and performing a tonsillectomy as the initial move is unlikely to get a favorable response. Women are sexual, yes, but unlike men whose engines are always revving, women's engines need to be primed and warmed up first. What you're suggesting is the equivalent of flooring the pedal before the engine is ready to go.
I must agree with the lady here. My first thoughts upon reading this was that this cat is either rolling with mainly drunk chicks, sluts or prostitutes. The move he is referencing is very selective and not universal by any means. And with the guy in question already dealing with timing and confidence issues...this move for him personally has disaster written all over it. Cannot recommend. Refer back to the post below it.
AnonymousApr 27, 2012 06:40 AM
Semi-retired Sigma's here with a high N count btw...' for stick.
I agree with Stickwick.
TLM, if I were to hazard a guess, I believe that the quality of women you date actually do not mind being groped while waiting in line at Burger King.
The type of women Stickwick is referring to as pigs would not offer a challenge to the lamest of heterosexual men, thus game would not be necessary. "Conquering" such is akin the Nazi takeover of Austria. "Come on in, the door's open!"
Boost your ego by riding the "town bicycle" if you wish. A good woman, a woman worth keeping, is not one who would put up with that treatment first date. And I can promise you with all that is in me, as the father of two daughters, if you or your kind were to try that shit with my girls, I would bury you in the woods.
I doubt the women that complained of Bill Clinton's groping were the only ones he did it to.
If what you do causes a giggle, playful hand slap, and a "you're so bad." You're on the right track. If it causes her to say "how dare you," you weren't going to have success with her anyway.
Then again, my last first date was over 17 years ago. He passed the 30 second qualification period handily. His assertiveness sent me soaring, no Mr. nice guy, just a very well conveyed message, "I want you."
When is the proper date to go full tongue and boob grabbing at Burger King with your daughters? If first date is too offensive maybe the second? by third I´ll be thinking they are after my money.
I regret getting this off-track with the first-date meme. The topic is making the initial move.
But I stand by my initial comment. One can differentiate between the boldness of simply making a confident first move and the boldness of going from zero to launching oneself at a woman like a horny octopus. It's not even a question of what's moral or proper, but what is most likely to be successful.
If I remember correctly, Stickwick's husband is ex-Special Forces. I would not think the Ray Romano profile would fit him.
And nice try Yohami. As if my daughters would give you the time of day, and you surely wouldn't have the balls to come to my house and ask permission to date them.
There are only two variables for what's acceptable as the first move:
1) how horny is she
2) who else is looking
A standard testing-waters kiss is probably best, but it has nothing to do with what's "acceptable" nor what's moral. Go back to how horny is she and who else is looking for cues on acceptability.
They can give me time of the night if they are busy during the day. You're right about not asking permission though.
Thanks for the responses. I should point out that I don't actually ASK for permission, I just feel like I should before proceeding. So I do nothing. We all know how that works.
I will get this beat. It's really frustrating to know what you have to do but have yourself rebel against you.
DD
rule number one of the game, ignore what women say they want.
Daniel, if you don't think playing with a nice set of tits or a nice ass is fun, you're probably a fag. Now go buy some italian loafers and let the real men talk.
Different strokes for different folks. There probably are women for whom tongue/grab would be a successful first move. I would bet for most women, it would not be a successful move.
With my husband, we didn't even have a first date before the initial move. After meeting him through a mutual friend and spending an afternoon together, he suddenly put his arm around my waist, pulled me to him, and gave me a long, slow kiss. It startled me, left me feeling a bit woozy, but definitely piqued my interested in him. Tongue/grab would have been too sleazy and desperate as the initial move, and would have been off-putting. But his confident embrace and kiss were definitely not unwelcome.
One of the reasons I come here is that I can freely admit to 99% of the things the game-o-sphere writers say about women without having to deal with the incredulity and scorn one usually gets for saying or asking about these things. It's a huge relief. They are all correct that politeness and niceness are not effective with women. My only point was that certain initial moves are more likely to be successful than others, calibrated of course to the type of woman you're gaming.
every chick likes having her ass and tits grabbed
" And nice try Yohami. As if my daughters would give you the time of day, and you surely wouldn't have the balls to come to my house and ask permission to date them."
OH NOES WE HAVE AN INTERNET TOUGH GUY
fucking gamma white knights...
Here's one way to settle this. Find a post by Roissy in which he suggests TLM's move as a general first-move strategy. We're talkin' going from zero contact to tongue-down-the-throat and hands-on-the-boobs-and-tush. If anyone can produce such a post, I'll retract my statement and declare Daniel the recipient of the first annual Ray Romano Commemorative Loafer for General White-Knightedness in the Line of Duty.
NC Dad
As the song says;
I'm a freak
I like the girls with the boom
I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom
I'm crazy.
Allow me to amaze thee.
They say I'm ugly but it just don't faze me.
I'm still gettin' in the girls' pants
and I even got my own dance....
You sound like a bigger fag than the 1st white knight that rushed to Stickwick's honor. Contrary to what you might believe, any woman, regardless of pedigree, social position, etc, will fully put out for any man that can put her tingles into overdrive. Yes, even on the first date!. Why is it you manginas completely discredit a woman's ability to give in to her sinful nature and place their virtue above the natural order of things? And spare me the internet tough guy routine. The very nature of your post screams beta.
So in the scenario above, wouldn't the guy have a modicum of thought that her number might be on the high side should she not object? But then some guys value chastity more than others.
Yeesh, it's not like Stickwick is saying he should ask permission. Even a kiss like the iconic photo of the sailor kissing the woman to celebrate the end of WW2 is mild compared to grabbing boob and ass on a first move. Build up a bit. One body part at a time.
DD - go ahead and kiss her. If she's just being nice or playing around (like angling for free dinners or just filling her time), the sooner you know the better. Then you can just move on rather than be strung along.
Good girls dont make up at Burger King´s line. That's so gross.
Macdonalds bathrooms though...
" My only point was that certain initial moves are more likely to be successful than others, calibrated of course to the type of woman you're gaming."
Grabbing her by the hair and dragging her back to the man cave is the preferable choice, but playing with her tits and making out with her is probably more socially acceptable.
nah, man, matinee disney movies...
...every chick likes having her ass and tits grabbed...
But it matters who is doing to grabbing. That's the trick.
DD, SarahsDaughter had a good point. Turn your thought process around and mentally give her a moment to say 'no'. If she doesn't, continue on to the next objective.
These are for third base.
which is why going for it prequalifies you as someone she could be attracted to...because you had the balls to just do it.
and chicks like balls
There you go again Stickwick.
First a strawman, now an appeal to authority.
I enjoy much of Roissy's writing. Some of it is pure gold.But in many ways, he's only validating what most men successful with women already knew. You're pulling a white knight of your own by putting Roissy on a pedestal. For all his talk though, it's the same guy who tucked tail and ran when some ugly attention starved single-mom, calling herself LadyRaine, exposed his true identity. Rather beta, I must say.
Now if you'd appealed to Prince, I may concede, but it's safe to say that that little shit would approve of my recommendation. And he's gotten more quality tail than 3/4 of the men in this country put together!
good point
what about sonic in front of a little kids soccer team?
Unsurprisingly, you misunderstood my comment.
This guy stalls out over "permission to kiss!" You think telling him to maul some lady is going to be a) executed properly by him and b) found arousing by her? That's just stupid.
The point is that the man controls the kiss. He does the double-grope-tongue thing on the first kiss? He's not in control.
If you are any good at kissing, she's going to be on you and then you can take her where you want to go.
Sorry if I confused your stunted hypothalamus about the wedding night term. It wasn't talking about a real wedding. I was talking about point b) (either five minutes, five days, five weeks or five months) following the spot where DD is stalling out.
Double-grope kiss is ridiculously bad advice for this situation. Sure, its slightly better than waiting for permission, but there's not much difference between kneading her and needing her, and the point is that the man should want to maintain the position of power (her needing/kneading him, not the other way around.)
Realism should never be confused for white knighting.
How would you ever know Sir Daniel.
Your posts come off as someone who would never have the balls to be so bold with the ladies. And if you must attempt to insult me, please get your anatomy & physiology right. If you don't know which part of brain determines cognitive understanding, then I highly doubt you know what parts are used to stimulate a woman's sex drive.
But hey, no sense in kicking sand in your eye. Stickwick already rejected your noble attempt to white knight a few posts above. Another beta fail, how's that working out for ya?
Backwards. You are qualified to pull it, then you do it. This is just as bad advice as "Just be yourself." The point is that if you don't have rank, pulling rank makes you look like a creeper.
If you get away with it, then yes, logically, you were qualified to do it. But someone who hasn't attained that sexual rank shouldn't fake moves like that in hopes that it magically transforms him into a hot guy.
Put it this way - Halomouse has the courage to meet a random 10 and gropes and kisses her. Does his ponytail fall off? Do his abs become rock hard? Does he lose the slurpee? No? Then why the hell would something so cultivated as his socio-sexual rank shift, just because he does something an alpha could do?
Groping towards alpha is exactly what it sounds like, and is not effective advice. In anyone's hands but a master, it is needy. This guy's not there, or he wouldn't be asking advice.
Let's just get him to the kiss, okay? Baby steps.
damned category-error-prone omegas...
now that's a fun date.
I have to agree with the girls on this. The Mrs was lucky enough to capture me early. But we keep PDA's down. Don't want to traumatize the kid's.
It as if the diver said he was afraid to jump in the water, and coach said: "No problem! Just do an extra twist in the air!"
Completely clueless. You don't give a kid a motorcycle because he's having a hard time figuring out the training wheels.
TLM, I have not rejected Daniel's refutation of your advice. I tend to hold Daniel's comments in high regard. I simply offered that I would not only retract my original comment, but concede that Daniel is also wrong, if you or anyone else here could provide evidence to the contrary.
A post by Roissy endorsing such a move would be evidence enough for me, since the vast majority of what he writes is consistent with reality; and unless he's lying, he has had a lot of success with the techniques he proffers. I think you suspect that neither you nor anyone else here will find such an endorsement from one of the premier Game practitioners on the 'net, and this is the reason you have impugned his character instead of building a case for why his techniques are flawed.
Daniel, this is what TLM said:
"Quit worrying about rejection, jam your tongue down her throat, cup her breast with one hand, and grab some ass with the other."
This was your response:
"[...] that sort of flailing doesn't sound any fun at all to me, especially for the first physical encounter. It just seems desperate and gropey and out of control. It's a first date, not a wedding night - and even on a wedding night, if you've done things right, you'll be grabbing all those things just to keep her under some semblance of control..."
In short, you sound like a 15 years old female virgin. If you have the matching body parts, gimme your number.
Stickwick
Prior to my reckoning with the Gospel of Jesus Christ, I would have made these so-called premier Game practitioners look like fumbling school children when it came to acquiring and using women for amoral purposes. These guys offer a great service to young men that have been raised to believe all the crap that feminism & liberalism teach about women, but the techniques are, and always have been, fluid. If you have the charisma, confidence, frame, and balls to do as I recommended to DD, it works. And works well. Been there, done that, got the STDs.
Have a nice weekend, I'm sure you enjoyed flirting with me today.
If you considered that flirting, then it's no wonder your advice to DD was so off-base.
What I sound like to you and what I am conveying are two different things. Maybe there's a language barrier, I don't know. I know what I wrote, since I wrote it, but you are missing the meaning (and you aren't the only one):
A person at DD's point is going to experience failure at double grope and tongue if he's stalling out at "permission to kiss," that's really like encouraging a man afraid of cats to go wrestle a tiger. If he doesn't, all well and good, but the odds are 99% against him that he can actually do that.
Wedding night isn't a literal wedding night (marriage and all that) - but a euphemism for a time after DD has physically initiated her with a kiss [Which is where his fear barrrier is.]
He should focus instead on deciding to kiss her and doing it, and cultivating her so that she is coming to him for physical contact whenever he wants it...but that's getting too far down the line.
What you can get away with and what DD can get away with right now are two different things. For advice, it is best if he overcomes his kissing fear/permission thing with success.
TLM - I assure you, I'm as aware of anatomy as you are unaware of cartoonish projection. I meant the terms I used, and am a little surprised that your vast wisdom and clear vision saw right past it.
If your girl wrestling skills are as good as your linguistical gymnastics, it is no wonder you get pinned so often and declare it victory.
It is neither amoral or immoral for DD to make the object of getting physical with a woman. You are getting pick-up artistry and Game confused. DD wants to get physical with a girl - that's a different thing than wanting to play the field. [Whether he does or not, or whether he is religious or not is immaterial. His request is not a morality question, but a technical one. Your technical advice is atrocious - akin to "Be Yourself."]
what kind of person uses the term "gropey?"
The kind who doesn't get easily confused by clear principles.
So, not you.
This is why game is so alienating to many people. No control, just go for the carnality as soon as possible. Definitely a bad thing for our society as it is allowing this to rule the day. You don't build civilization on barbarians,whatever they want to call themselves.
Is this the intellectual level of this blog? The original site is perfect by comparison.
Name calling and playground games are the best some commenters can do.
The base post had reasonable points in spite of this, though it is too bad that you can't discuss these issues without the equivalent of raciss being thrown out.
There is no category error. You are to chickenshit to make a move because you feel like you need to ask permission. That's because you put women on a pedestal... and that's why you're a gamma.
My first moves vary but the old standard is to pull 'em in for a slow... kiss... ending with a little bite on their lip.
The little bite is key.
It says... "are you sure you're big enough for this ride?" And what turned on chick doesn't like a challenge?
Quit worrying about rejection, jam your tongue down her throat, cup her breast with one hand, and grab some ass with the other.
This is what Roissy calls the sperg approach. It's not going to work on most women and it's definitely not going to be performed in a manner that any woman will appreciate by a man with assertiveness issues.
It's indicative of Gamma overreaction. It's rather like when a man asks about how to deal with a woman being disrespectful... there's always going to be one Gamma who says something like "punch her in the face, then fuck her sister"! Leading with your tongue and grabbing a woman's ass prior to actually kissing her on a date is the sort of mistake a junior high boy would make.
Casual sex with drunk strangers? Sure. But not on a date.
The base post had reasonable points in spite of this, though it is too bad that you can't discuss these issues without the equivalent of raciss being thrown out.
That's raciss. Why do you hate Antarcticans, RBA? Why?
TLM didnt say that tongue down was the FIRST move. The reaction against that explict scene is pretty funny.
I cant think of a single woman I´ve been with that didnt include tongue, breast and ass early on. Not the first interaction - but something to go at as soon as I could, and with no shame whatsoever.
"not o a date"
cough.
Vox
Stick with history, economics, apologetics, and the other stuff you do so well. I wouldn't have expected you to fallen for the same idiotic linear interpretation that these other gallant knights were so easily tripped up on.
And you guys all talk about how awesome Roissy (JIM W) is and put him on a pedestal. The real original Roissy in DC was quite different than his blog persona. He totally pussed out in the face of exposure and his constant posts on how great anal sex was were just plain gay. That's nothing but latent fag talk. Your hero worship of him is quite beta, gamma, omega, or whatever other category you can muster up.
And my points with how DD could find success were spot on. Boldness wins the day, always. Of course for those of you that don't have it, your immediate reaction is to suggest that what I'm saying is boorish frontal assault. That was not what I meant. I now bid farewell Sir Ted.
Josh and TLM are game-hating feminists trolling the blog.
????
I would accept that, but I have seen far too much similar thought around the game-verse. Though perhaps that is why it is easy to parody.
DD,
don't know if this would help, but one instance from my past that I recall clearly....
I was with my college buddy at a lingerie modeling show. I took an aisle seat so I could see better, had a couple drinks, and waiting for it to begin.
The first couple models were doing whatever they do at the front, and the third one came down the aisle. She stopped, waiting for her turn, right next to me.
Without thinking, I ran my hand slowly up between her legs, all the way, to discover no panties. Her skirt hid this from everyone else. After a few seconds, my nice guy training overcame the deeply buried alpha that had surfaced thanks to the 2 drinks. I withdrew, and then I finally looked up at her again. Maybe her pausing next to me was no accident, but when she saw that I wasn't cringing or anything, she gave me a big smile and headed up to do her stuff for the crowd.
My very gamma friend was astounded that I didn't get slapped or thrown out (this was a pretty high-falutin' event). Actually, I was surprised myself.
My point is that boldness, if your confidence and frame are good, can get you much further than your upbringing and programming are telling you. Let's face it, if she's sticking around on the date past the first few minutes, she's interested. Kiss her already. WHAT. DO. YOU. HAVE. TO. LOSE?
You're an idiot. Josh is a regular commenter both here and at VP. We've known him for years over at VP and I've met him in person several times.
" "punch her in the face, then fuck her sister"! "
Then BURN HER FUCKING VILLAGE TO THE GROUND AND RAPE HER DOG WHILE IT IS STILL ON FIRE!
RAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!
VoxApr 27, 2012 03:55 PM
"Quit worrying about rejection, jam your tongue down her throat, cup her breast with one hand, and grab some ass with the other."
This is what Roissy calls the sperg approach. It's not going to work on most women and it's definitely not going to be performed in a manner that any woman will appreciate by a man with assertiveness issues.
Leading with your tongue and grabbing a woman's ass prior to actually kissing her on a date is the sort of mistake a junior high boy would make.
Casual sex with drunk strangers? Sure. But not on a date.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Vox I said virtually the identical thing you did here yesterday morning in the TLM-Stickwick debate and you deleted my post. I guess there really is only room for one Sigma on your blog, lol. Too funny.
"Without thinking, I ran my hand slowly up between her legs, all the way, to discover no panties. Her skirt hid this from everyone else. After a few seconds, my nice guy training overcame the deeply buried alpha that had surfaced thanks to the 2 drinks."
Never confuse liquor courage (as we used to say back in my doorman days) with being alpha. Recently a police officer in my neck of the woods was I believe charged with a sexual assault and fired from his job for doing the same thing. You offer very bad advice...or at least a piss poor example of being bold.
"My first moves vary but the old standard is to pull 'em in for a slow... kiss... ending with a little bite on their lip."
Damn, Ima startin to think that all serious playas have the same moves...and the same virtual thoughts for that matter.
My comment should have said I could accept that, not that I necessarily believed it. I find the attitudes being expressed to be too common so that it really doesn't matter. The attitudes are held by many.
I once kissed a woman's neck without thinking. She liked it. She asked me if I would tell my wife if we had sex. Stupidly, I said yes I would. I was on an honesty kick. I didn't get any from her.
"You offer very bad advice...or at least a piss poor example of being bold."
I think the real point is: Be as bold as you think you can get away with. If you don't have the confidence to get away with it, you won't.
In the Navy, I knew an officer that went straight for the crotch grab, before he even introduced himself. He got rejected a lot, but never any real backlash, on to the next target. Any chick that wasn't immediately put off by it was a guaranteed lay. 99% of guys don't have the confidence to get away with that, even many PUAs would have a hard time with that method. Someone that doesn't have the confidence to kiss a chick can't fake their way through a tit/ass or crotch grab. I know Daniel's getting a lot of heat on this thread, but he's right: Baby steps.
Domo arigato Mr. Fagoto
Yeah that's right Kyle, you nailed it.
DD,
I'm in the same boat as you are so I don't have alot of advice for you other then you should not listen to Josh or TLM. Success would not be worth being anything like either of the two. They are not posting to help you, they are posting for their own egos. They could easily offer their opinions without being nasty to the other people posting but they seem to enjoy deriding people who disagree with them. Not people to emulate.
-Siah
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