More than anything I wish my dad knew game. I wish he were open to it. In the last few weeks I have been the reluctant observer to several family situations that could have been avoided had he known game.
It seems so simple at times. I have only a rudimentary understanding of game and yet after applying it with a small degree of regularity I am far more confident than I ever have been. I used to have a mild panic attack if anyone even spoke to me, now I engage in pleasant conversation with complete strangers. To be honest game is not entirely responsible for this state, I have had therapy for years now, but nothing I have learned from therapy or from game has really been in conflict. Both have been about facing fear, and facing it over and over until I overcome it. If I do not I have only myself to blame. I am the only person responsible for my happiness.
As I have learned to manage my emotions, fears, insecurities, and negativity I find that people can tell. When people know you are stable they will look to you for support. I have no claim to being an alpha, but even a slight move in that direction has changed how the people around me respond. Several have commented on the difference they see. They say I am more social, calmer, cooler, and my favorite: zen-like. Significantly, certain family members have decided to lean on me heavily, and in every case the problems these people are facing would either be reduced or eliminated entirely if my dad knew game.
I watch my brothers flounder about trying to maintain stable relationships and know that if my father knew game they would not have these troubles. I watch them struggle to move their lives forward and know that if my dad was reliably alpha they could turn to him for encouragement. I have had to listen to my sisters wondering if he loves them, something I doubt they question with me. They are constantly seeking my company even though (and possibly because) I tease and neg them relentlessly. I listen to my mother complain about her marriage and wonder why she is confiding in me. I listen to all these people and know that if my father had even a rudimentary understanding of game these people would have someone to turn to. As it is I am a poor substitute.
If anything my family's struggles have convinced me that game is not optional. If I would be a man and raise a family, game is an absolute requirement. I have heard some people talk about breaking the cycle of abuse when it comes to their family. As I see it, learning game is breaking the cycle of weakness. Every man should know it. It can be used with everyone, and if used properly it will not only change you for the better it will change the lives of the people around you. Maintaining frame, passing shit-tests, negging, these are not trivial techniques to just get girls into bed. They are means of demonstrating strength, calm, protection, and competence. When you demonstrate value as a man you are demonstrating something that everyone values, something that is rare. You cannot lose by learning game. There is no reason not to.
14 comments:
Kudos for your progress, bro.
Ok now youve done it, im going to buy some game books now that ive told myself i cant afford yet.
Great perspective, RM. I totally agree.
The analogy I use is that of a brick wall. Your family needs to know that you are strong, protective, established, and that you will not panic or be moved by circumstances. You need to be a brick wall for them.
Having said that, you also need to be kind, generous and involved in their lives. All of us respond VERY well to a strong leader who shows us consideration.
That's my 2 cents.
i think he is confusing Game with being a man. sounds like the concept of game has led him to finding his balls.
with this war on men going on, many men are not stepping up. could have something to do with this assault to feminize us. as a consequence, many boys growing up do not know what right looks like.
rick
"i think he is confusing Game with being a man. sounds like the concept of game has led him to finding his balls."
Thats what the real Game is about
Fo sho.
Rick
A man who lets his family go to shit and his wife walk all over him is a man who doesn't understand the purpose of a civilized society, what's necessary to exist in on, or why it's largely an illusion. He's betrayed himself.
Don't ever shy away from conflict. War is found in every corner of life. To fear war is to fear life.
Good work.
I just noticing the men in our family and the dynamics of the alpha/beta/ tendencies in relation to whom they have as wives. To a large degree, its all Game.
I not only used game to get my fiancee, but it's slowly taming her. (She's from a somewhat primitive culture).
The only problem is she won't leave me alone. Locking her out of my study only makes her ... ardenter.
Oh, what I meant to say is:
RM, I'm also quite introspective, and I've found it to be a mixed blessing as well. You might try deliberately turning off your brain in social situations. No internal monologue.
I do not believe that negging has half the importance that maintaining relationships does, and the inflation of such minute parts of game has been what irritates me. Much of game is about having confidence and strength (or pretending to, if you're a PUA), but some who take it to the extreme make legalistic pedestals of more minor, individual pieces of advice from it. Negging and teasing are just playful parts of a relationship, but not its backbone; don't overdo it.
"The analogy I use is that of a brick wall. Your family needs to know that you are strong, protective, established, and that you will not panic or be moved by circumstances. You need to be a brick wall for them.
Having said that, you also need to be kind, generous and involved in their lives. All of us respond VERY well to a strong leader who shows us consideration"
NAILED IT. You got it in one too, Rick; this is why I feel that calling the aspects of being a man "having game" is problematic; it makes it sound like it's all about posturizing. And in the SMP, many women have fallen for that posturizing even when there's nothing more there.
Good luck maniac. Heh heh.
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