The curse of female "success"

Success is rarely as wonderful as reported:

Debi Thomas, the best African-American figure skater in history, couldn't find her figure skates. She looked around the darkened trailer, perched along a river in a town so broke even the bars have closed, and sighed. The mobile home where she lives with her fiance and his two young boys was cluttered with dishes, stacks of documents, a Christmas tree still standing weeks past the holiday.
"They're around here somewhere," she murmured three times. "I know I have a pair," she continued, before trailing off.

"Because — what did I skate in? — something. They're really tight, though, because your feet grow after you don't wear them for a long time." Her medals — from the World Figure Skating Championships, from the Olympics — were equally elusive: "They're in some bag somewhere."
Uncertainty is not a feeling Debi Thomas has often experienced in her 48 years. She was once so confident that she simultaneously studied at Stanford University and trained for the Olympics, against the advice of her coach. She was once so lauded for her lithe beauty on the ice that Time magazine put her on its cover and ABC's Wide World of Sports named her athlete of the year in 1986. She wasn't just the nation's best figure skater. She was smart — able to win a competition, stay up all night cramming, then ace a test the next morning.

She wanted it all. And for a time, she had it. After Stanford came medical school at Northwestern, then marriage to a handsome lawyer who gave her a son — who in turn became one of the country's best high school football players. Higher and higher she went.

Now, she's here. Thomas, a former orthopedic surgeon who doesn't have health insurance, declared bankruptcy in 2014 and hasn't brought in a steady paycheck in years. She's twice divorced, and her medical license, which she was in danger of losing anyhow, expired around the time she went broke. She hasn't seen her family in years. She instead inveighs against shadowy authorities in the nomenclature of conspiracy theorists — "the powers that be"; "corporate media"; "brainwashing" — and composes opinion pieces for the local newspaper that carry headlines such as "Pain, No Gain" and "Driven to Insanity."

There's a conventional narrative of how Thomas went from where she was to where she is — that of a talented figure undone by internal struggles and left penniless. That was how reality TV told it, when the Oprah Winfrey Network's Fix My Life and Inside Edition did pieces on her.

"She's got all these degrees," fiance Jamie Looney said as he watched television with Thomas inside the trailer. "She's a doctor. She's a surgeon. And she's here. I've got one year of community college. I know why I'm here. I look at her, wondering, 'Why are you not working somewhere else?' "
Such comments upset Thomas. "People are all like, 'Get a job,' " she said. "And I'm like, 'You people are fools.' I'm trying to change the world."

A woman's primary purpose is to be a helpmeet to her husband and the mother of children. Unfortunately, neither of those qualities are praised by the mainstream like "being a SCIENTIST" or "an ENTREPRENEUR" or, best of all a "HUMAN RIGHTS ACTIVIST."

Often a woman will find great success at something non-marriage/non-making-babies related, then crash and burn when they find that success wasn't nearly as satisfying as advertised.

Remember, without women having children, the human race will literally cease to exist. In comparison with that, being the first female ASTRONAUTBALLERINALAWYERINNERCITYHANDBALLTHERAPYORGANIZER means little.

The female humblebrag

ClarkHat comments on a female scientist wanting to make sure that everyone knows she is married and her colleagues find her attractive:

Tuuli Lappalainen @tuuliel
Dear fellow scientists. The next time you’re going to google for info of the husband or wedding of a female colleague, think again.

Welcome to the Oort‏ @ClarkHat
A woman humble-bragging about how people wonder if she's single is female intrasexual competition.

It's the more sophisticated "feminist" version of the 22yo posting on facebook "why do all these guys at the club stare at me?"

So the hilarious thing is that a thread NOMINALLY about feminists and against evolved heterosexual and status oriented behaviors...

Is in fact an EXAMPLE of that very thing: a high status woman letting medium and low status woman know that she has tits AND brains.

What's moderately amusing is the fact that these women seem to think no one understands what they're doing or why they're doing it... despite the fact that so many of them do it at every given opportunity.

The consequences of trading up

Two pro-West women, Lauren Southern and Brittany Pettibone, address the consequences of applied hypergamy.

Hypergamy renders women barren

Overeducation is a form of self-sterilization:

A dearth of marriagable men has left an “oversupply” of educated women taking desperate steps to preserve their fertility, experts say.

The first global study into egg freezing found that shortages of eligible men were the prime reason why women had attempted to take matters into their own hands.

Experts said “terrifying” demographic shifts had created a “deficit” of educated men and a growing problem of “leftover” professional women, with female graduates vastly outnumbering males in in many countries.

The study led by Yale University, involved interviews with 150 women undergoing egg freezing at eight clinics.

Researchers found that in more than 90 per cent of cases, the women were attempting to buy extra time because they could not find a partner to settle down with, amid a “dearth of educated men”.

Sure, they should simply settle for less-educated men. But they won't. Because hypergamy.

Hypergamy is a bitch

Women who put their careers first seldom understand what they are doing to their relationship prospects:

How different her world is today. Kylie, 48, has just asked her struggling actor fiancé Joshua Sasse — who’s nearly 20 years her junior — to leave their (er, her) multi-million-pound West London home amid reports he has been cheating on her with a Spanish actress.

Kylie and Sasse have split amid reports he has been cheating on her with a Spanish actress. The idea of a tear-stained Kylie after the split is heartbreaking. For there has never been a greater proponent of love than her.

She has searched for decades to find Mr Right. And after doomed relationships with Donovan, the late INXS singer Michael Hutchence, model Andres Velencoso and French actor Olivier Martinez, she finally believed she’d found him.  Only last Tuesday, she was on ITV’s This Morning professing her love for Sasse, saying she’d change her surname to his when they married.

Kylie Minogue is a very successful actress and pop singer. She used to be very attractive too. Let's review the list of public romances mentioned in the article.

1. Actor
2. Rock star
3. Model
4. Actor
5. Actor

Can she REALLY affect surprise that she hasn't found a man stable enough to marry her? This isn't that hard. One would feel a similar lack of sympathy for a man who couldn't figure out why the none of the various strippers, prostitutes, and porn stars with whom he'd been involved had turned out to be Mrs. Right.

The failure of girl power

A successful business woman belatedly learns that she doesn't like being the breadwinner:

My husband has a life that many people who are "rule-followers," like me, would envy. When I first met him, it was undeniably a passionate love affair. I'd never dated anyone or known anyone like him before. He took risks, lived all over the world, had many passions and has been a loyal friend. He's seven years older than I am, and we met at work, where his power and seniority at the office was insanely attractive to me. The year we got married, he wanted to take a risk and go back to graduate school to find his dream job. I trusted his judgment, and between his savings, my new job, and some sacrifices, we comfortably lived while he went through two years of graduate school. My husband now has his dream job. I'm proud of everything he's accomplished and what we were able to do together to make it happen.

Over the past four years, my career has skyrocketed in ways I never could have dreamed of. I've broken through the hypothetical glass ceiling in a male-dominated industry. I am a huge believer in women in the workplace and always will be. If they become the breadwinners in marriage, more power to them.

Now herein lies my problem — I became the breadwinner in an extreme way. I committed to supporting us for two years, but we're going on four now, and it will likely be five. Our income divide is so extreme that I pay for 90 percent of our living expenses. What I've found is I can't live this girl-power lifestyle that I believe in.

I'm very close to a breaking point, and I never stop thinking about leaving my husband. And no matter what other reasons I come up with, it always leads back to money, power and sexual attraction

Feminism is pure fiction. Any attempt to live one's life by its tenets are utterly doomed to failure. At this point, if you're still a feminist, you're just stupid.

Intellectual shock and awe

Jolie tweeted this:

Half done @voxday's book.He's my intellectual crush. Men should emulate him,then women wouldn't feel t/ need 2 engage in intellectual debate

Smart women are every bit as hypergamous as every other woman. But having written a book doesn't make one any smarter, all it does is materially demonstrate to its readers the quality of one's intellectual capabilities - with the caveat that natural writing talent often makes an author look smarter than he is - and allow them to be accepted at face value.

But that doesn't mean one has to write a book to demonstrate one's intelligence. Formulating correct syllogisms on various subjects ahead of time, refusing to engage in arguments on subjects that one does not know, and never presenting a case without a relevant example are all techniques that will tend to demonstrate one's intelligence and thereby reduce the smart woman's need to challenge one's intellect and prove it superior to hers.

The really good-looking man doesn't need to constantly prove that he is handsome. The truly intelligent man shouldn't feel any need to do the same.

He'll make one unlucky woman very unhappy

A precious Alpha snowflake snowflakes, alphally, on Gab:

I'm into smart women, most would call me an alpha male. I doubt I am a 'black swan' & I do not see any 'logical necessity' at all.

He's obviously not very smart himself. Let's work out the logic:

1. Women prefer smarter men, because hypergamy
2. Alpha snowflake prefers smarter women, because snowflake

Now, who is going to be happy when Alpha Snowflake finds himself in a relationship with a woman who is smarter than he is?

Of course, there is a solution. All Alpha Snowflake has to do is find a more intelligent woman who isn't hypergamous....

Men prefer smart women

In theory. In practice, not so much:

As the tides of history and gender change, it would be easy to assume that men — recently unseated as the dominant intellects and degree-havers in the U.S. — would adapt to a world where women are not only their equals, but often their intellectual superiors. After all, there's nothing like dating someone who makes you a little sharper. But more and more research reveals that though the thought of a smart woman is appealing to men, a real, live smart woman standing in front of them is actually a turnoff.

It never ceases to amaze me that women find it so impossible to understand that men do not share their preferences with regards to the opposite sex. Women prefer to marry up in terms of intelligence, as they do with pretty much everything else from height and weight to income. So, it should be obvious that either a) men prefer to marry down, or b) every man who permits a woman to achieve her goal of marrying up is actually too stupid to realize he is marrying down, in which case perhaps she isn't marrying up after all.

It's not bad that men prefer to marry down in terms of intelligence. If they didn't, then women who achieved their preference of marrying up would be reliably marrying into a structurally unhappy marriage.

The French, at least, understand this. Let women be beautiful. Let men be brilliant. Vive la différence.

The Attraction Irony

The hallmark of a broken society: many women will now respond better to male infidelity than to male fidelity.

Most men in this part of the world won’t so much as verbally disagree with his female or even raise his voice at her. Men like this are fearful of the proverbial shit storm they’re sure will ensue if they upset the applecart. For this reason they live in a perpetual state of discontentment caused by this fear.

A man in a relationship where he’s afraid to check his woman for any reason will lose the single most important element in in keeping her loyal: respect. A woman cannot love a man she does not respect. It can’t be done. And if a man doesn’t have any backbone, his woman can’t respect him let alone love him.

According to women, two of the worst things a man can do to a woman within the context of a sexual relationship is physical abuse, and infidelity. But knowing what we know about women tells us that that these two ‘crimes’ keep them around a hell of a lot longer than the opposites.

It does make sense, in a sick sort of way. The man who cheats obviously commands interest from other women, whereas even the most desirable man can be dismissed as unable to attract interest from other women if he is resolutely faithful.

From a strictly hypergamous perspective, the unfaithful man is more sexually attractive than the faithful man, by definition. Traditional women are taught to control their hypergamous urges, just as traditional men are taught to control their promiscuous urges, but then, increasingly few men and women have been taught to deny themselves anything these days.

Divorce by YouTube

From a reader:

I had no idea who/what MirandaSings was until yesterday. Essentially an obnoxious/awkward female character performed by a woman named Colleen. She married a guy named Josh and their entire relationship has been part of their youtube fame by putting it out there.

The interesting part was looking at their respective announcement videos about getting a divorce.

With Josh you can see the confused and hurt beta male.

With Colleen you can see a woman putting on a show but just under the surface you can see she's either already got a trade-up on line or is prepared to hook one.

Anyways, the body language in the videos says more than I could.

I know nothing of them, but I can't say I'm surprised. Any couple that lives its life in public is at vastly higher risk of separation than one that doesn't. That's one of the many reasons Spacebunny and I keep our private life, and our family, to ourselves.

I'm going to say no

I don't think the author of this piece quite grasps what "the selfish gene" actually is:

If it’s been said once, it’s been said a thousand times, nice guys finish last. But why is it that women choose dominance every time over niceness, dooming notions of sexual equality to dismal failure?

The Selfish Gene” theory could explain the tendency of women not only to marry up, but to completely disregard the bottom 4/5 of men as potential suitors as The Pareto Principle suggests and eyewitness evidence in any club in America will illustrate. Here’s a simple definition of The Selfish Gene:

A lineage is expected to evolve to maximize its inclusive fitness—the number of copies of its genes passed on globally (rather than by a particular individual).

This theory is bad news for men in a sexual market that has shifted to look more like a jungle than a civilization since the advent of “women’s liberation” a.k.a. feminism. The Realtalk translation of that very effete sounding definition of The Selfish Gene works out to: Women want to fuck the winners, and they will fuck over the losers.

Women have evolved to disregard and even harbor contempt for “inferior” DNA. In a cruel world in which survival of the fittest has been the rule from day one over 4 billion years ago when life began to form in the slime, being a nice boy doesn’t cut it. Women, more than men, are beholden to the influences of The Selfish Gene, and though we may lament its effects on our sexual and familial prospects as men there are sound biological reasons women have evolved to be ruthless when it comes to choosing sexual partners.

As much as it pains me to say this, a little reading of Richard Dawkins is in order here. Selfish gene theory will not explain hypergamy because there is no known hypergamous gene or even combination of genes that lead women to behave in this manner.

Indeed, the "quality" theory underlying hypergamy tends to conflict with the idea of the selfish gene.

It's not her fault, blame evolution

Now scientists are excusing female infidelity with science:

What drives women to cheat is a subject that has been long debated over the years. And now scientists are suggesting women have been programmed by evolution to pursue affairs in case they decide to leave their partners.

New research claims this 'mate switching hypothesis' particularly applies to childless women whose loved one can affect their ability to raise offspring. The theory that affairs are women's natural back-up plan challenges the accepted notion that humans are intended to be monogamous. It suggests humans have evolved to constantly be on the lookout for better long-term partners that their current ones.

David Buss, Cari Goetz and their team told the Sunday Times: 'Lifelong monogamy does not characterise the primary mating pattern of humans. 'Breaking up with one partner and re-mating with another - mate switching - may more accurately characterise the common, perhaps the primary, mating strategy of humans. For our ancestors, disease, poor diet and poor medical care meant few lived past 30 - meaning experimenting to find the most suitable partner may have been key to survival.

Scientists claim people would pick partners with the highest chance of survival, but have someone in reserve in case that person died.

That's certainly a novel excuse. "This isn't what it looks like! I'm only trying to prepare for your inevitable death!"

Of course, the reduced attractivness that is concomitant with the aging process tends to get in the way of this partner-replacement theory.

She's ready now

After failing to lock down any of her Alphas, 44-year-old Lisa Snowden has "suddenly" found romance with an old friend:

She's dated some of the world's biggest heartthrobs including George Clooney and CSI's green-eyed Gary Dourdan.

But it looks as though Lisa Snowdon has shunned celebrity boyfriends in favour of some normality, reportedly falling for her friend of 15 years George Smart. A source has told The Sun he was her shoulder to lean on when she split from her ex, with the pair eventually  growing closer.

Imagine that. What's funny is the idea that somewhere out there is a Delta in the throes of unrequited love, thinking that this is a success story that justifies his patient, "wait-her-out" approach.

"It's already been five years, just ten more and she's mine!"

Bow before hypergamy

It doesn't matter what the narrative logic demands. For women, the fairy tale demands that the cute guy gets the girl, not the loser gamma:

Howard Deutch and John Hughes thought they had "Pretty in Pink" all tied up at one point. The director and writer/producer, respectively, shot the ending, finished the final edit and rolled out a version for feedback.

Much to their surprise, audiences actually really disliked the film's ending, to put it mildly.

“The ending didn’t work in the test screening … That shocked everyone because the architecture of the story was that love endures and overcomes everything,” Deutch told The Huffington Post about the original ending, where Phil "Duckie" Dale (Jon Cryer) and Andie Walsh (Molly Ringwald) end up together.

“The girls in the test screening didn’t go for that. They didn’t care about the politics; they wanted her to get the cute boy. And that was it. So we had to reshoot the ending," Deutch said.

Forget love. Girls want cute. The mistake that Hughes made - to the extent it can be called a mistake given how successful the movie was - is that if Duckie was going to get Andie, he needed to up his socio-sexual status.

Delta Man: Supply and demand

There have been some articles floating around lately about Tinder and the hookup culture it has fostered. This article is interesting as it Rihanna claims she’s holding out for a better man.

I have some bad news for her, the current demand for men with Game is outstripping the supply so to the victors will continue to go even more spoils. If you live in a city there are really only three requirements for consistently hooking up on Tinder. 1) Don’t be ugly 2) Be in great physical shape (show off the abs in the pics you send back) 3) Have some Game. If you don’t chase the hotties but rather focus on average women on Tinder you only need to be average in #2 and good at #3.

Rihanna is also 27 so she’s probably seeing The Wall approaching and the hottest guys are now looking at the 19-24 year olds and not her. Welcome to weaponized hypergamy hell Rihanna. The article in question also has this laughable line, “Repeatedly we’ve been hearing about the demise of millennial relationships being caused by thoughtless or lazy young men.” If only the high ranking men would settle down with me and not play the field! This closing line is also a hoot, "So, ladies, don’t waste your time having casual sex with beta males in hopes that your Prince Charming will show up." The women hooking up generally aren't having sex with low ranking men, but high ranking men because it's exactly the type of man they hope to land long term. The idea that one can "hold out" for an Alpha is delusional, as the Alphas are the ones with notches all down their bed posts by definition. 

The fact is that there are little to no incentives for a modern man (outside of religion) who does well with hookups to settle down unless he wants to create a more stable environment to raise children. Even then, marriage is optional. There is an endless supply of young women who believe that hookups in their early 20s are empowering, fun, and don’t think of the long term consequences. If a woman sleeps with two or three dozen men between 18 and 27 and then suddenly wants to settle down, how does she deal with that sexual history when a man asks? If a man at 30 has slept with a dozen women (or many more) in the last year alone, why would he suddenly stop with her? 

Since I'm not a heartless man I can say in reading the article that there are hints at a deep loneliness and a realization by the author that she may be on the way to a life of being single, cats, and there's a certain tragedy to this. The Western world is literally stacked against a woman who is approaching 30, ridden the Alpha carousel for years, and suddenly wants to settle down with even an average man. Average men are retreating out of the field to games and porn, have already gotten married, or looking to up their game to hookup with women. I don't like seeing people suffer, and there's a lot of suffering going around in relationships today.

As I’ve said before, your actions in hookups and dating aren’t neutral and will have long term consequences. If you are a woman reading this and are hooking up with men realize that your pool of potential husbands you’d actually like to marry shrinks with each encounter as the longer you wait the smaller the pool of eligible bachelors becomes. Men who are hooking up a lot have a different issue, which is the ability to always find another woman means long term commitment for you will be difficult even when it’s what you are desiring.  

Delta Man: She would rather be alone

Right now, across the Western world there are millions of very lonely women who will die alone and childless. There are millions of single moms who will at least have their children, but never even get another date as they get fat and grow bitter.

There are countless Gammas who will wonder why they can’t get a date this weekend, but the above women won’t even give them the time of day. Many of these Gammas would marry a single mom if given the chance so it’s not about that.

What does this mean? That millions of women would rather die alone, have their cats starve a few weeks later, and their bodies found by a landlord or a friend than spend one romantic moment with a low ranking man.