Sunday, May 3, 2015

Half as attractive

Being fat cuts down male interest by at least 50 percent:
I’ve never bought into the lie, popular with some elements of the media, that everything will be better when you’re thin. But, as a single woman trying everything I can to increase my chances of finding The One, I was interested to see how much of an issue size is for single men.

So, to find out if men like fat women, I created two identical online dating profiles of me size 18 and size ten to find out.The rest of the profile details were the same for both. In the ‘photos’ sections, I put up a range of head shots and body shots of classic ‘thin’ me and classic ‘fat’ me.

THE RESULTS

Over the course of five days, 'fat' Yvette received 18 messages, 74 likes and 81 visits. Thin me received more than double the attention – 36 messages, 211 likes and 210 visits.

There was nothing dramatically different in the content of the messages – some men just sent a ‘hi’, some wrote essays, some tried one-liners and others just opted for old-fashioned compliments. And there was little difference in the physical attractiveness of the men messaging – they were a range of ages, shapes and sizes.

But it can’t be denied that, if the guys of OKCupid are anything to go by, single men prefer thinner women twice as much.
I say "at least" 50 percent because Yvette wasn't actually thin, she was merely less fat. Based on the fairly low number of messages "Thin Yvette" received, I would estimate that if she had actually been a thin and attractive woman, going up to a size 18 would have cut male interest in her by 95 percent.

43 comments:

Doug Cranmer said...

Size 10 is thin? Right there. The delusions of women.

Unknown said...

Yes, the true number would be far more than 50%. Another thing that skews the numbers is that a certain number of guys on online dating sites simply send message to ALL the women. They figure it's easy, so why not? Then there are the men just looking for easy sex who are more likely to message the less attractive women because they figure they'll be desperate, low-hanging fruit. That won't be obvious from their pictures, but I bet if she started meeting these men, she'd find that all the men she finds attractive are in the group that only messaged the thinner version.

As an aside, consider the fact that a fat woman got more messages in five days than a typical man probably gets in a year. Someone tell me again how women have it so hard in the dating market these days.

Noah B. said...

If that seems shallow, try varying parameters related to income a man's internet dating profile and you'll probably see similar results.

David said...

I like how they think men should just find land-whales attractive. Women could not possibly have it any easier to be attractive. They literally have to do nothing to make it happen. Grow your hair? Happens automatically. Stay thin? Don't eat like a hippo. And that's pretty much it, but that's too much apparently for the last two useless generations.

Polynices said...

How sad. She'd actually be cute if she lost weight (some fat women would still be ugly at any size).

Yohami said...

"Over the course of five days, 'fat' Yvette received 18 messages, 74 likes and 81 visits."

MEN ARE FUCKING THIRSTY. How she gets even one like is beyond me.

Matt said...

@polynices true but its better to be a butterface than a total zero.

Dexter said...

@Yohami,

Blacks, Middle Easterners, desperate dorks, fat men... plenty of bottom-feeders will date a white fatty.

Dark Herald said...

I first noticed this trend around 2000.

Up until then, fat girls always wore voluminous, billowy clothing. Mu-mu type stuff, you know what I mean.

Then in 2000, they suddenly started wearing skin tight clothing. They indulged in that weird little early 00s fashion of wearing thongs visibly above waist line. Skin tight lycra shirts that magnified every gelatinous rippling lump, seemed to suddenly be a favorite. Bare jiggling, muffin top, midriffs with exposed navels became de rigour.

And this seemingly happened over night.

My first thought was that they had suddenly gotten to lazy to care how they looked. But that wouldn't explain why they were following hot girl fashions.

Finally the truth came to me. The Special Little Snowflake Syndrome. These fat girls had suddenly decided that they had a right to be found attractive.

Retrenched said...

The epidemic of obesity is also largely to blame for the sexual starvation of beta males. Fewer bangably attractive women = fewer satisfied men. Not to mention the effect that widespread obesity has on the egos of women who aren't obese -- an otherwise average looking woman who's in shape can strut around like she's a 9 when she'd be a 6 in a saner, less corpulent world.

Unknown said...

Another difference between her profiles is that she lied on the size-10 profile by saying she was "thin" when she should have said "average" or "a few extra pounds," but she was honest on the size-18 one with "overweight." So a guy looking at the "thin" profile gets the impression that she thinks she's hotter than she is, which is a red flag. Also, if a man filtered for only "thin" profiles, her size-10 picture came up next to a bunch of actual thin girls, which would make her look even fatter by comparison.

It's sad how even the caption writers play along with the idea that her self-image concerns at size 10 were inexplicable. She thought she was fat because she was getting fat. No, she wasn't obese yet, but you can see the flab starting around the edges in all the usual places, and that usually gets worse (as it did in her case), not better. She could see that in the mirror too, and she knew she was fatter than she was when she was younger, so she felt fat. Of course she did!

Unknown said...

I mean, if a man's hairline retreats an inch and he starts getting thin on top, is it ridiculous if he starts worrying about baldness and feels a bit self-conscious? Does he have to lose every hair before he's allowed to think of himself as bald? If he starts wearing hats, is that a sad commentary on society's unrealistic body image expectations for men, or is it just him dealing with the facts of life?

Megamerc said...

From the article, emphasis mine: The most important element to me is that no matter my size, I’m now twice as confident in my body than I was as a size ten.
When I was thinner I was more self-conscious, less confident around men and much more uptight.
A date with me now would be way more fun than it would have been then.
If I went back to a size ten I’d mourn the loss of my boobs more than celebrate my flatter stomach.
The best philosophy is to please yourself. Hopefully then you will attract someone who likes the version of yourself you’ve chosen as much as you do.


And this is why women are not good judges of what makes a woman attractive to men.

Also, at size 18 she is twice as confident than at size 10. Apparently confidence is now directly related to size. Confidence = X*Size
So... confidence isn't related to your body size if you're thinner... but it is related to your body size if you're fat.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

"...18.messages, 74 likes and 81 visits."

WTF?! That's the problem right there.

We need more fat-shaming--not less.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

I'm convinced that, just like small men in the gym who bulk up to ridiculous proprtions to oompete with the taller, bigger guys, a lot of women let themselves get fat because they think it intimidates men.

You can almost see this mindset at work in the fat warpigs strutting about as if they're proud of being so disgustingly overweight.

Unknown said...

When I was thinner I was more self-conscious, less confident around men and much more uptight.

Translation: "When I was just a little pudgy, I still had hope. I still got enough attention from men that I wanted to look as good as possible. Now men ignore me, so I've given up. I'm much more relaxed this way." It's like the difference between the guy with a little bit of a gut who still sucks it in when a hot chick walks by, and the 400-pound guy who just lets it all hang out.

What a bunch of crap. If she could walk into the store tomorrow and buy a pill that would make her wake up a size 2 the next day, she'd knock people over to get to it. So would 99% of the fat women who claim to be happy with their bodies. To be fair, she probably has tried to lose weight, and all the mainstream advice from Dr. Oz and others just made her fatter; but that's no excuse for lying and claiming you're happy that way.

Dexter said...

just like small men in the gym who bulk up to ridiculous proprtions to oompete with the taller, bigger guys, a lot of women let themselves get fat because they think it intimidates men.

The small guys are at least trying to make themselves more attractive to women and to compensate for their natural disadvantages.

The fat chicks are making themselves deliberately unattractive. They've pretty much given up. They're like omega males; just as "omegas are either totally indifferent to women or hate them with a borderline homicidal fury", fat women hate men with a borderline homicidal fury.

Unknown said...

"...18.messages, 74 likes and 81 visits."

WTF?! That's the problem right there.


Yeah, just let it sink in: a woman who looks like that got approaches from over 3 men per day. And that's not counting the likes, which I guess are guys who were interested but didn't go to the trouble to send a message (or maybe you have to pay to do that, I dunno). But it seems likely that this woman could have sex with a different man every night of the week if she wants to -- and probably with men of at least equal SMV. Amazing.

liberranter said...

.

You can almost see this mindset at work in the fat warpigs strutting about as if they're proud of being so disgustingly overweight.

Yes. The attitude is what is so unbelievable, the belligerent, bitchy, nasty aura of "yeah, motherf*****, I'm fat! You'd better love it and be glad I'm even looking your way, you pathetic loser!" And in their amazingly potent suit of narcissistic solipsism, they can't figure out why men walk out into oncoming traffic to get to the opposite side of the street juzt to avoid them.

I'm showing my age by bringing this up, but I remember in my younger years, when far fewer fat women walked (or rather, waddled) among us that such women were usually ALWAYS demure, meek, self-conscious and pleasant to be around. They knew they were on no man's A List, but realized that if they wanted any positive male attention at all, they had to earn it .

cecilhenry said...

Is this what passes for 'science' and 'research' with women??

To wonder if being fat is important for attracting men?? The level of narcissism, disinterest in men and rank blindness is staggering.

This has been known readily and obviously for 10000 years. But she still wants to check if she can't get an answer she would prefer.

Laughable contemptible is what this woman is.

Bob Loblaw said...

I'm convinced that, just like small men in the gym who bulk up to ridiculous proprtions to oompete with the taller, bigger guys, a lot of women let themselves get fat because they think it intimidates men.

I don't understand this. Men look through fat chicks like they don't even exist. That's not a sign of someone who's intimidated.

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

The attitude is what is so unbelievable, the belligerent, bitchy, nasty aura of "yeah, motherf*****, I'm fat! You'd better love it and be glad I'm even looking your way, you pathetic loser!"

When you find out they're still getting approaches from men every day, you start to understand why. Yeah, those aren't the best quality men, but think what it would be like if you had women, even low SMV women, propositioning you every single day. Think you might strut a bit? Heck, I get a bounce in my step from one girl flirting with me.

I don't think any woman gets fat on purpose, though (except a few rare mental cases). She starts to plump up, probably somewhere in her 20s. At first it's manageable; she lives on Diet Coke for a couple weeks and burns it off with stress. But it gradually gets harder, even though she watches what she eats far more than she did in her teens when it didn't seem to matter. She diets and yo-yos and one day she's 50+ overweight in her mind, which means pushing 100+ in reality. Now it seems insurmountable, so she stakes her flag on, "I meant to do that!" with a hefty side helping of denial. And if men are still approaching her, she might even believe it.

Anonymous said...

The previous post about the extinction of marriage as the default in society should be laid squarely at the feet of this obesity epidemic among women, plus the entitled attitude that comes along with it.

If you want marriage to survive in your society, you have to make it attractive to Deltas. Why? Alphas, Betas, and Sigmas will always have a relatively easy time, and Gammas and Omegas a difficult time. It's the Deltas, the average men, who are the schwerpunkt of the society.

Way back when, when the plain janes did try to look after their appearance, stay as thin and attractive as possible, and treat men well, most men happily got married. (In Ukraine, this is still so; the women are actually not any more attractive intrinsically than American women, but they dress stylishly and don't balloon out, at least not until they hit 35-40 or so.) But as the Deltas' natural wife material gets fatter and bitchier, marriage rates go lower and lower.

Another question: why don't the Deltas simply ignore the fat bitches and hit on the hot women? My theory: you can't underestimate the psychologial beating that most Deltas nowadays have. They dismiss the hotties as "out of their league". Or if they do try to get with them, their nerves give out, they turn Gamma on them, and turn them off.

Anonymous said...

I don't understand this. Men look through fat chicks like they don't even exist. That's not a sign of someone who's intimidated.

@Eric
Men don't check out fat chicks (except maybe if they're so ghastly they look like a freak show), but I've always noticed that even the most morbidly obese monstrosities are still fully able to find a man who will marry them. For the longest time, I never understood how they do it, but I now suspect that they simply go online and let some loser pick them up.

Dexter said...

"I now suspect that they simply go online and let some loser pick them up."

Could be postmarital. Sometimes putting on the wedding ring is like pulling the lanyard on the inflatable lift raft...

More than once I've seen the girlfriend and I can tell it is her destiny to be fat -- and she achieves this destiny once she has landed the husband and squeezed out a couple of urchins.

Anonymous said...

Could be postmarital. Sometimes putting on the wedding ring is like pulling the lanyard on the inflatable lift raft...

No... I'm talking about morbidly obese unmarried girls managing to easily get husbands.

I haven't really noticed girls bloating drastically after marriage too much. Sure, going from thin to overweight does happen fairly often, but at least among the women I've seen, if she's morbidly obese, she was that way (or, at least, mildly obese) before she landed her sucker.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

I was at a public shopping district yesterday afternoon and I calculated that about 2/3 of the women I saw were overweight and/or deformed or disfigured in some way. I saw several women with almost perfectly spherical body shapes. There were a large number of fat female teens. The abundance of womanly curves I recall from my youth has diminished, it seems.

Anonymous said...

Early church teaching was that gluttony was a deadly sin.

Modern church teaching (in some churches) is that unrestrained appetites will lead to coveting, lust, and eventually sexual sin.

This is a rather glaring area in most of our lives, and one that should be addressed head on. I got a handle on fornication mostly through getting a handle on my eating.

Once I was able to ignore a donut and not stop at every drive-thru I saw, it got easier to ignore a text message from a plate and not stop at every slatternly woman's house I drove past.

A woman with uncontrolled eating probably has other uncontrolled appetites as well. Stay far away.

Thirsty guys who are willing to give gluttonous women attention are ruining it for everyone else. They should be treated as if invisible. And normal women really, really hate obese women. You should hear them talk sometime in their "inner circle".

ThirdMonkey said...

Churchian Deltas are catching on that the "good" thin girls will plump up once they get hitched. My church has an abundance of good looking guys married to pretty girls-turned-landwhales. One of our pastors is in his early thirties, ,10%bf, and can do 20+ strict pull-ups. His wife is a chubbo. A few days ago, she posted a pic on Facebook of them when they first married. My wife's response was, "Whoa, she was hawt. Poor guy, now he's stuck with a manatee." My wife is completely repulsed by this woman, and others like her, for the shame they have brought to their husbands.

Women get fat because they can get away with it. A thin girl on the path to fatdom can be easily put back on course with some playful pinching and negging. And you don't even have to do it very often, just enough to get her to lay off the sweets for a week or two.

Anonymous said...

@ThirdMonkey
Well, as JCclimber wrote on the previous thread:

You have to take solipsism into account.
You just drop a few comments about OTHER people's divorces.


...Or, in this case, make casual remarks about fat chicks or how other girls are too fat every chance you get.

Those guys with landwhales probably consider it un-Churchian to dump on fat chicks... so their wives let themselves turn into lardos.

Anchorman said...

It's the same story.

It is, in fact, un-Christian to dump your wife if she gets fat. There's no two doubts about it.

And it would be un-Christian to deny your wife sex after she balloons.

We've touched on this numerous times. Men stop being the guys that originally attracted their wives (present company included) and can go churchian. Women stop being the women who attracted their husbands, often times by gaining weight, but mainly by becoming bitchy and controlling.

Feminism destroyed society's soft controls within marriage and now marriage is a mess. Trying to re-establish it makes you an outlier and subject to intense harassment.

We were told we would be hated by this world. So, bask in the hate and have fewer regrets by making every effort to establish and maintain headship.

And good luck, because that world out there is ready to rip you marriage apart at the first chance it gets.

Unknown said...

I got a handle on fornication mostly through getting a handle on my eating.

Most people nowadays would think you're crazy to see a connection there, but traditionally lust and gluttony were closely tied. Both involve surrendering to one's appetites. Pope St. Gregory the Great said, "Unless we first tame the enemy dwelling within us, namely our gluttonous appetite, we have not even stood up to engage in the spiritual combat."

Matt said...

For many, food is the first addictio

Aeoli Pera said...

>I say "at least" 50 percent because Yvette wasn't actually thin, she was merely less fat. Based on the fairly low number of messages "Thin Yvette" received, I would estimate that if she had actually been a thin and attractive woman, going up to a size 18 would have cut male interest in her by 95 percent.

Suggests exponential decay. Should add that as a confounding factor (in the modern analysis) to the female beauty bell curve for BMI held constant roughly in the middle of the 17-22 range.

PhantomZodak said...

despite the fact that there were chubby chasers contacting her, these deluded fat pigs still whine about how haaaard it is for them. they insist that they "deserve" high quality men instead of realizing their place.

luagha said...

Back in college, a woman asked me to teach her how to exercise in the gym and be her workout partner. We did so for a time.
Because I was primarily setting the workout, it had standard exercises like bench presses which she performed to the best of her ability.

Over the course of a few months she became slimmer, more toned.. and because of the comparative emphasis on the bench press (emphasis compared to more usual feminine gym workouts of the time) her breast size went up two cups.

And one day she mentioned, surprised, that two people from her classes with whom she'd never before exchanged a word had both asked her out.

Anonymous said...

i like how she admits to considering the physical attractiveness of the men who are making approaches on her ...

but the men aren't supposed to consider her physical attractiveness.

R Devere said...

How could she even get fat? She drank diet sodas every time she "super-sized her junk food meals, ate "low fat" processed foods for dinner, avoided butter for margarine and had artificial sweetners for her coffee and tea. FAT? That unpossible!

Fat is a state of mind and diet working together. Unfortunately, it takes some knowledge of scienec to understand why and some small matter of discipline to overcome and maintain your weight.

Modern land whales are evidenc ethat far too many women have neither the education nor the discipline to maintain their weight at acceptable, healthy levels. Besides, its always "someone else's fault" they're fat !!!

Marissa said...

No one needs science to know that eating less will help you lose weight, unless you have some kind of metabolic disorder.

Also, love the "really, really modest" under the picture of her in a bikini top.

Unknown said...

It's funny how women ignore the fact that you can keep getting attention from men almost no matter how you look. Sure her attention was 2x as much when she was thinner. But she ignores the fact that she was probably 4x more likely to actually get in a long term relationship when she was thin. And getting in a long term relationship with a man she herself would be PROUD of? Probably 10x more likely when she was thin. The '2x as much attention for a one night stand' is a pretty lame metric.

Feather Blade said...

Up until then, fat girls always wore voluminous, billowy clothing. Mu-mu type stuff, you know what I mean.

Then in 2000, they suddenly started wearing skin tight clothing. ...
These fat girls had suddenly decided that they had a right to be found attractive.


Mmm... not necessarily (or at least, not solely). IIRC about that time was when all the fashion gurus started saying that "fitted clothing makes you look more slender!" ... which it does, but the "fitted" clothing the gurus were talking about were tailored shirts and skirts, and jackets with structure, in stiffer fabrics.

If one either did not understand that, or were not paying attention to the pictures of the clothing associated with the "fitted" designation, it would be easy to tell one's-self that "fitted" means "skin-tight in whatever fabric". The outrage from these girls at not being found attractive would have resulted from, rather than precipitated, the change in clothing.

Unknown said...

What I don't understand is why people are being silenced when they talk about fat women. Here in Asia, it's just a natural way of life. There's no such term as 'fat-shaming' here.

Even celebrities in the US receive so much hatred if they say anything about fat women. Here, we would feel hurt, then do something about our weight. In the US, people are expected to bend over backwards to accommodate the overweight. Why?

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