Saturday, January 24, 2015

Portrait of a Gamma (Paladin-class)

Notice that this guy has no children, no wife, and no life, and lives alone with a cat, but he's a Paladin in his own mind: He is a true Social Justice Warrior and he is "stepping straight the fuck up"!
If these fedora vaping MRAs and game-stooges want a fight, I’ll give them one. Hell, I’ll let them take the first swing if it ever gets into the Real World (which is as unlikely as them landing the first hit). What are they gonna do, call me a Social Justice Warrior? That’s only an insult in their heads. A White Knight? I’ve got news for them: I’m a goddam Paladin to these motherfuckers, and I’ve got Smite Evils to go around. I see a Dudebro bullying a woman, a POC, or a GLBT, trying to use terror to get them to be quiet or quit gaming, I am stepping straight the fuck up.

And if any of you Dudebros are reading this, if you think I’m doing this in the hopes of getting rewardsex, stop projecting your deprivations onto me. I’m in your face because you refuse to be a decent human being. Full fucking stop. I’m engaging because it’s the right thing to do, because trying to be the strong silent example gets overwhelmed and obscured by your shit, and because I want my two darling nieces to not livein  fear of jackasses like you.
Sure you will, Internet Paladin with your "Okinawan KarateDo" and your two-year quest to "get down to 22% body fat". Sure you will. The poor guy has no idea how unattractive his white-knightly supplication is to women.


Markku said...

Maybe if he practices a bit more, he can bust a move like this.

Mr.MantraMan said...

I'm sure the glorious POC think he is wonderful, should probably poll them to see what they think of yet another white SJW ass clown pretending to white knight for them.

Unknown said...

"Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted.

Matthew 23:12

Rek. said...

That guy, delusional freak much. He has his own interpretation of reality which is not in accordance with its factuality.

Last night, about 2AM. Was coming back from drinks downtown. Good thing about me, women like me, as in "he is a chill, cool and fun guy". Plus I probably look high value enough, so women will cut the crap and give me the red pill version of events. Well that's how I like to believe things are.

I am talking with these 2 (group of three) girls. "Do you like guys hitting on you?" Answer: Something along the lines of I don't like to be harassed (self-preceived) by low value males, but I like high SMV guys chatting me up.

So if Paladin wants to protect women, I got a tip for him: "don't talk to them, because you are creeping them out, you are harassing them and they really don't like that".

Dark Herald said...

I love this guy's constant references to Okinawa Karate Do. It lets you know exactly what kind of Kung Fu Beast he really is. This is from a time when Cracked didn't suck:

But with all the mysticism and intrigue of martial arts, it's sometimes hard to tell if the Karate Master you're speaking with is a passionate hobbyist or a delusional douchebag. The easiest way to tell is how much he explains his fighting style before you've asked. If a guy tells you he takes krav maga and he's done talking about it, he's a normal person who enjoys krav maga. If he tells you he trains in krav maga and immediately describes the situations where he could use it like the Israeli commandos who invented it because they needed a fighting style that worked, you should feel safe using a punch to get him to shut up.

I have nothing against people sharing their interests, and every martial art has its own theories on how combat works. In aikido, you use your opponent's energy against him. In wing chun, you attack and defend at the same time. In taekwondo, you have a place to leave your kids for an hour
(*Ain't that the fucking truth*). The point is, if your martial art is so magical and complicated that you feel the need to explain it, you've probably only tried it out in your imagination. And if you study your own unique fighting art that takes bits and pieces of what's effective from other styles, oh buddy. Oh, you poor thing.

Seanbaby could be such a good writer if he would just get over his daddy issues and take the Red Pill.

Captain Internet Paladin is one real world fight away from an ego shattering event. Consequently he'll avoid it like the fucking plague by trying to hide behind his black belt. It starts with, "I better warn you.." Quickly escalates to, "given all my training, it's my job to back down..." Ending tragically with, "when you think about it, I won that fight."

bearspaw said...

Have Mobile- Will travel. Facebook Paladin San Francisco

Kallmunz said...

Vox are you sure you want to take this guy on? He wrote this back in August and look at ALL the comments he's generated

Paul, Dammit! said...

Well, that was good for a giggle, initially, at least.
On reflection, it made me a little sad, though. I mean, there's our dumpy man-permed Hero, an adult man in a $3 t-shirt in a public bathroom, and he just cares SO HARD for the gays and the helpless brown skinned proles who are waiting for their chinless white messiah. He just knows it, but can't find the opportunity to show them that some of their goyim betters really do care about the weak and defenseless GLBBQs, damsels and those afflicted by melatonin-related-failure-to-thrive.
And yet our proudly racist, bigoted, effeminate man-permed Hero is 'engaging' by writing tough and showing off the biceps of an 60-year old obese woman. Any question as to why no one is despised more than a White Knight?

Dark Herald said...

It's guy's sensei that makes me really laugh. The guy behind the Internet Paladin. The man that's building him up so he can totally get in face of the evil dudebros!

I can picture him perfectly.

First he's got a ponytail. If you are a sensei in Okinawa Karate Do, you totally have a ponytail. A Harry Reams 1970s pornstache, that's required. And a biker gut. He's the one warning our hero, not to go below 22% body fat. "That's too much man. That's not healthy at all. You know Roman Gladiators were actually built like me. It's true! And there is reason for that.

L. Beau said...

Beware, evil-doers! Not only do you have to worry about Batman, now there's CAT-MAN!

Happy Housewife said...

What a dumpy little man. Not only do I feel more protected, but I'm sure you "dudebros" are quivering at your keyboards.

Anonymous said...

Bow to your sensei!

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

It has to be a joke...!

Stg58/Animal Mother said...

You think anyone wants a roundhouse kick while I've got these biceps?

Dark Herald said...

Pay attention Students!:

"Yes Sensei!"

"Today I will teach you how to estimate an opponent's weight just by looking at him."

Tommy Hass said...

Not sure what is worst. His preposterous, bog standard SJW tendency to swear in an effort to prove his toughness? His bog standard attempt to make "fedora" into an insult against "MRAs" (when it's really an insult against Dawkins type atheists)? Or his ridiculous claim that Gamerghazis want to get SJWs to stop playing games?

What a despicable sack of cowdung.

Anonymous said...

Hard to tell these freaks apart, but seems like a gay uncle, a bottom boy playing butch

Anonymous said...

Has anyone ever noticed the tendency of these fools to use the term 'decent human being' a lot. It is the height of arrogance to think that only people following your social political movement rise to the status of 'human being'.

Anonymous said...

Paladin is a dead on example of the Rob Lowe Direct TV "Dude Bro" ad. Don't be that guy.

Salt said...

Look at that gut in his horrid selfie. "dudebro-paladin" should be ashamed.

Doctor Mayhem said...

I bet this paladin's fighting style is something like this...

Anonymous said...

Like Nate at VD, feel the need to quote Clutch.

By the way the name's Marcus; if you'd like you can call me sensei.

Tommy Hass said...

I've got you all beat.

Honorable mention: Lol.

Dark Herald said...

@Tommy. I think your guy's pony tail isn't real. Nope, not real. that's an extension. That's unearned Martial Arts excellence and I won't stand for it!

Now Grand Imperial Lord High Master of Death Mark Shuey shows you how it's really done.

Behold the grace and power of the Cane Kata. See how he manages not to have a heart attack between the precise steps of this dance of death!

I think this guy should be Captain Internet Paladin's next teacher once family court catches up with his current teacher.

SQT said...

As a woman I just look at this and think aw, poor guy.... So earnest, so clueless and so sad.

L. Beau said...

Even the guy's vocabulary has an odor of loserdom. Paladin, really? To about 4% of the U.S. population, "Paladin" means a gunfighter from 1950's T.V. Another 3-5%, largely but not entirely non-corresponding to the first group, recognize the word "paladin" as having something to do with the World of Warcraft / Dungeons & Dragons sphere of middle-school-boy-l337-enthusiasm. But the other 91% just say, "huh?"

One suspects that the percentage of Americans who recognize the pre-1957 uses of the term "paladin" is too small to be measured.

Nice work, bearspaw, but surely you meant, "Have Gut / Will Travel."

Kallmunz said...

For some reason I went and checked out the pictures he posted on Twitter, there are a lot. It is really sad, the poor guy has one picture of him with his little niece, but as far as human contact goes, that's about it. There are tons of pictures of his cats, lots of selfies, but nothing of any friends. The poor fellow called Vox a "racist, sexist....., and he uses the term "DudeBro," so he obviously is a sycophant for some mediocre midwit. As you go through the pictures, it is easy to tell he is very lonely, you can see why he is a "White Paladin," in his own mind it gives him something to fight for and defend. He posts quite a bit on Twitter, given the complete disinterest in his blog, Twitter is probably the only contact he has with people in the outside world. To me the saddest picture was him holding up a Diet Coke can which had "share with your BFF" printed on it, he posted "Any takers?" But not even this "friends" on Twitter would have a pretend drink with him. I have no doubt he lives in a lonely hell. If he would bow down before throne, receive the Spirit and proper teaching his whole life could be transformed but his mind is deceived and he suffers greatly because of it. Originally the thought crossed my mind to send him a link of this discussion we are having so that he could see the mocking, now I couldn't possibly. Seriously, pray for him.

Matamoros said...

Read about a U.S. Karate master who went to study under a Taiwan Kung Fu master. The master asked him what his martial art was and he said karate. The master replied, "Ah, Karate. Good for fighting old women and children."

Bob Loblaw said...

Ending tragically with, "when you think about it, I won that fight."

"Did you see how the skin on that guy's fist was all busted up?"

Bob said...

"Did you see how the skin on that guy's fist was all busted up?"

Punching bag won

Bob Loblaw said...

To about 4% of the U.S. population, "Paladin" means a gunfighter from 1950's T.V. Another 3-5%, largely but not entirely non-corresponding to the first group, recognize the word "paladin" as having something to do with the World of Warcraft / Dungeons & Dragons sphere of middle-school-boy-l337-enthusiasm. But the other 91% just say, "huh?"

Minus people who've been in the army, for whom it's self propelled artillery.

ray said...

Another 'brave' little punk who got his ethos from teevee dramas about Pore Wimmins In Danger (guess who's the Hero) and SJW indoctrination in American fem-schools.

If you look like him, you have little recourse but to play WhiteKnight, cause it's the only attention he's gonna get from females.

These Unmen are everywhere in New Amerika. They provoke actual men with womanish, passive-aggressive incitements, and then when you finally turn on them in anger, they dial 9-1-1 and record your 'criminal behavior' on their cellphones.

Quite an example of modern U.S. manhood. And they are Legion.

Brad Andrews said...

I am a fair bit older, relatively out of shape and not a fighter, but I suspect I could take him quite easily if he pushed it. Kind of stupid to boast things you don't appear to be able to fulfill.

I am certainly not quaking in my boots now, what appears to be the intent.

Anonymous said...

To me the saddest picture was him holding up a Diet Coke can which had "share with your BFF" printed on it, he posted "Any takers?"

Ouch. If a guy I worked with posted something like that, I think I'd start mildly keeping an eye on him, watching for signs that he's becoming unbalanced. Not that every lonely person turns into a workplace shooter, of course. But when you're begging random strangers to be your best friend, and you aren't even hiding the desperation behind a joke anymore, that can't be a good sign at all.

Another data point for the "men who post selfies are gay" collection, I guess.

Bill Solomon said...

lol the life of being an asshole can sometimes be lonely. This keeps me going, though.

Stg58/Animal Mother said...

Just going to the gym would help Paladin out a lot.

Stg58/Animal Mother said...

I left a comment on his site. Not approved.

LP2021 Bank of LP Work in Progress said...

Oh gees, this is sad. The cat is a worrisome type is just waiting to throw his life down for some silly girl or cause like RAPEY before he explodes in a rage. Dont know, but maybe he must have the virgin-whore complex of mom is perfect and women are whores but higher than himself but they are all so perfect he must protect them from PUA and MRA's. I am write large anti feminist, pro man, I will not defend myself or fight back or correct a man b/c its a waste of time unless the issue warrants it.

LP2021 Bank of LP Work in Progress said...

Dark Souls offers a so-so paladin set of armor.

Prof. Spudd said...

He uses "dudebro" as much as The Scalzi. I wonder why.

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Gurney Halleck said...

I have lately realized that a lot of overt manginas and vocal online male feminists are involuntarily celibate males who take the "nice guy" act to the absurd conclusion of uber-white knight behavior in the form of being an online warrior of feminism. Some men seek out Red Pill/PUA knowledge/skills to improve their lot in life, others resort to extreme "nice guy" behavior to put a bandaid on their perceived deficiencies as males. This latter group includes prominent Hollywood players like Joss Whedon and Judd Apatow.

pdwalker said...


dunno, but that "i'm not gay" gay vibe he gives off is just as strong, not that there's anything wrong with that.

The Deuce said...

OMG, I've seen that guy around on Twitter. There he comes off as a guy who is ridiculously insecure and trying to hide it under layers of pretentiousness and delusions of grandeur. Has a habit of passive-aggressively tweeting at Mike Cernovich despite having him blocked. I had no idea this loser had a blog. He's even more hilariously deluded when expounding at length!

GB said...

The thing with these guys is they take the label of White Knight as a badge of honor. We should just call them what they are: Tools.

This guy is a tool for women. He does whatever they ask, and would never dream of asking for sex in return. He's the perfect utility male.

We should start calling these guys "DeWalts" or something.

GB said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Back when I was in college in the late eighties, the 'Okinawan KarateDo' people were the martial arts group on campus that didn't spar.

Several years ago, when I was at the martial arts birthday party of my nephew, we all got a lesson in board-breaking and then got to split some pine boards (split the grain the easy way, not against the grain). All of the ten-year-old boys split their board and even a 5-year-old girl who had had to come along with her parents and brother split a smaller one; except for the kid who had a red belt from the 'Okinawan KarateDo' school down the street. He kept hesitating instead of driving through and hurting himself bouncing his hammerfist off the board over and over again while the teacher instructed and coaxed him.

He burst into tears and everyone was embarassed for him. I have never seen a better example of how your mind can hold you back from doing something you are naturally capable of, but there it was. Eventually he succeeded, after switching to his less hurt left hand and trying several times there.

Anchorman said...

We should start calling these guys "DeWalts" or something.


HMS Defiant said...

None of you ever heard a girl scream in the dark outside your place and not one of you pulled a gun and went out to see why? In gun intolerant zones, none of you got a bat and went to investigate screams in your neighborhood?

As the sailing coach at USNA used to say, 'your position has been established.' He reserved that for the hindmost.

Based on the comments, only the most very buff men dare aspire to use a baseball bat to beat the shit out of a rapist or use a gun in the peace-maker style?

Anonymous said...

I guess the reason why the behaviour of the gamma male seems so irrational regarding the attraction of women, is that they have reached critically low self-esteem and therefore have given up on women. Things like social justice agendas, atheist smugness, etc. are just quick fixes to raise their self-esteem.

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