A lot of these questions change if you ask them from the female perspective. A girl is not going to see “guys” as a gender, she’s going to filter “guys she likes”, “guys she really really doesn't like” and the majority of “invisible guys”.This is an important lesson. Every man is familiar with the experience of a woman asking him a question and then rapidly losing interest as soon as he answers it. When that happens, there are two possible explanations. Either you are answering in more detail than she would like - and I am regularly guilty of this - or you are answering the wrong question.
The guys she likes capture her attention and make her curious, she wants to get them – the subtext question is “how do I get them”. The guys she doesn’t like, the question is “how do I get rid of them”. The rest of the guys, she doesn’t care.
As long as they are nice and do her favors.
The question of “what do men would like me to know” is followed by “and that I can use in my favor.” So this quiz should be renamed to “how to gain understanding in the manipulation of men” and hence that’s how I'm calling my post.
But, girls, first things first, men are people, too. We’re not just cattle to be classifie… nevermind.
* * *
What guys think is important, their perspective on life.
Most men are concerned about how to be a good man / the best man they can be / trump other men. Being a winner / being successful is tied to…. wait what? you’re bored already? that’s because I'm actually talking about men, see, you didnt ask the real question:
What do guys [I LIKE] think is important [ ABOUT ME AND RELATIONSHIPS WITH ME], their perspective on life [ AND IS IT COMPATIBLE WITH MINE?]
The solution is quite simple. Provide minimal answers. Don't explain. If the question is a yes or no answer, answer only yes or no. Make her pry the answer out of you. If she's interested, she will. If she actually has another question in mind, she'll be forced to ask it.
27 comments:
Yep. This is a hard habit to develop, because we've been taught over and over that women want lots of communication, that they want men to open up to them and share their feelings, blah blah blah. So it's easy to turn into a chatterbox when a woman shows an interest -- even more so than around guys, where it's just natural to keep your mouth shut unless you think you have something worthwhile to say.
But it works: when a woman asks a question, it's hard to go wrong with Roissy's "It's complicated," a plain yes or no, or even just a wry smile and silence.
I tell women to make me a sammich and if they don't I delete them. I'm not all that concerned with what they think or what they ask. I tell them all I have in my head is a low hum to drown out most women and some men, too.
Yes, you have to build intrigue and mystery. If you have value, they will dig for their answer because you already interested them, and you just revealed that your opinions and information are not free either, that you're aware that they have value and you don't just freely dump them into the world upon request.
This has been a valuable thing for me to internalize and put into practice, especially at work.
Feed the gerbil.
Am I alone in having noticed some women ask seemingly 'deep' questions where they don't want an answer at all, but just want to feel pleased with themselves for having 'considered' the question?
Thanks for the feature. The best question / response is the last, when the she asks what do men think about sex.
The best question / response is the last, when the she asks what do men think about sex.
Agreed. Good stuff man
The problem I have seen is women don't often ask a question to be answered at all. They are asking if you will surrender something, a bit of your will, or a bit of your manly allowance, to them. By agreeing with something asinine. The best answer, always, in that situation is... "No, and piss off", in some form or other. Then ask a favor. It works like a charm for me. I even usually get my request.
As for literal questions? Sometimes they would like to know, serusly! If it's above them just tell them where a resource is, like a book or even a blog if you know one, to get them up to some sort of speed. That at least gets you off the hook until she does her part, if the subject is beyond her at the point she comes to you. If she doesn't do the homework, you have that as a shield for teh stupid. If she still isn't up to speed, or didn't get some of the finer points, then either give her more homework, or offer a bit of tuning then decide about a conversation.
I'm never exactly sure what is being suggested here, so I fired both barrels. ymmv
Yeah, but don't be too much of a jerk with her. She'll learn from you regarding her areas that you might want to learn. And women play dirtier already. So... slap a little salt on that. At least if you would like it to be a longterm/lifetime relationship. Otherwise just enjoy the burn, until it's your turn. Yum!
My spousal unit does seem to get more questions than I. I tend to teach the kids how we can answer that question ourselves and in turn employ that same technique to other questions or aspects in our lives. Why the use of logic can help us and those around us.
Which is why they ask Mom more stuff than me.
Spousal Unit is more concerned with getting them the right answer and less concerned with teaching them to find the right answer. Which is, I suppose, the result of the theory you put forth.
Not earth shattering. Just further support, I guess.
Han,
If you'll recall, it was Dr. Jeremy's AMOGging her blog that set off the jihad. Women can't abide excellence that she does not possess, from Eve on. Let it go - she's lost, as is all she had created. A cautionary example.
I was talking with my wife earlier tonight, and she mentioned that she'd gotten into a bit of a tiff. Another woman had posted something rather implausible: a claim that 80% of people hadn't picked up a book to read in the last year. My wife asked for sources, and the poster took it as a personal attack. (What? You don't believe me? Why not? It's not like I would post something that wasn't true or verified, right?) Then started backpedaling to a much less ambitious claim. (Ok, 20% of people with no more than high school education have not picked up a book in the last year.) Finally, a guy posted original sources that showed that the person who did the initial survey had repudiated it, and there were other methodological errors that put the huge claim into question. And thus was the fire quelled.
"No, and piss off"
One friend of mine has an incredibly efficient method, but it works better in Finnish. "no, I won't." would be "en." He says "e?".
There is so much subtext in that one syllable. First of all, it says implicitly that the question is not worth going through the entire two letters, they'll need to make do with one.
But the intonation also poses it as a question. Basically it says "ok, I'll play. Obviously I won't do it, so I assume the question is rhetorical. So, I'm saying my part now, and expect you to now make your REAL point next." Note that the tone is not hostile, it sounds like a genuine question.
I know what you are thinking: There cannot be that much subtext in one vowel. Yes there is. Women are incredible with subtext.
Obviously this only works face to face, not in text. An actual question mark would be too explicit. They have to wonder if it indeed was a question, or just a bit quirky way to say "no". This pretty much flusters 99% of people asking him to do something, because they just don't know what to say next.
My husband has abandon me and the kids for the the past 8months now, and refuse to come back because he was hold on by a woman whom he just met, for that, my self and the kids has been suffering and it has been heel of a struggle, but I decide to do all means to make sure that my family come together as it use to, then I went online there I saw so many good talk about this spell caster whose email is onimalovespell@gmail.com so I had to contact him and explain my problem to him and in just 3days as he has promised, my husband came home and his behavior was back to the man i got married to. I cant thank the spell caster enough for what he did for me, i am so grateful and i will never stop to publish his name on the internet for the good work he has done for me,once again his email is onimalovespell@gmail.com
I gave this link to a girl and she seemed interested but didnt finish it in front of me. Is this a positive sign or negative sign for game in general?
if you have to ask...
Greetings to every one that is reading this testimony.My husband breakup with me 2 months ago after (8) years of marriage just because he met another woman in his working place and he left me and the kid to suffer. one day when i was reading through the web for help, i saw a post on how this spell caster Dr Kasee on this email worldwidesupremetemple@gmail.com ,on how he have help a woman to get back her husband and i gave him a reply and explain my problems to him to his email and he cast a love spell for me which i use to get my husband back from the wicked woman who took him away from me and after 3 days my husband come back to me.I believed him and today i am glad to let you all know that this spell caster have the power to bring lovers back. because i am now happy with my husband. Thanks for Dr. Kasee. His email: worldwidesupremetemple@gmail.com
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Hi My name is "BEKAR JOE" I was married for 15years with lilian my wife and 2kids and we lived happily until things started getting ugly and we had fights and arguments almost every time... it got worse at a point that she filed for divorce... I tried my best to make her change her mind & stay with me.she moved out of the house and still went ahead to file for divorce... I pleaded and tried everything but still nothing worked. The breakthrough came when someone introduced me to this wonderful, great spell caster who eventually helped me out... I have never been a fan of things like this but just decided to try reluctantly cause I was desperate and left with no choice... He did special prayers and used roots and herbs... Within 7 days she called me and was sorry for all the emotional trauma she had cost me, she moved back to the house and we continue to live happily. what a wonderful miracle dr. trust did for me and my family. I have introduced him to a lot of couples with problems across the world and they have had good news... I strongly believe someone out there need's his help... via (Ultimatespellcast@yahoo.com or ultimatespellcast@gmail.com) Don't give up just yet, the different between "Ordinary" & "Extra-Ordinary" is the "Extra" so make extra effort to save your marriage/relationship if it's truly worth it.call him +2348156885231 his website http://reuniteexback.webs.com
Hello Everyone,
I am Mrs Theresa Wallcott Owen, from mexico. My life became devastated when my husband sent me packing, after 17 years that we have been together. I was lost and helpless after trying so many ways to make my husband take me back. One day at work, i was absent minded not knowing that my boss was calling me, so he sat and asked me what its was all about i told him and he smiled and said that it was not a problem. I never understand what he meant by it wasn't a problem getting my husband back, he said he used a spell to get his wife back when she left him for another man and now they are together till date and at first i was shocked hearing such thing from my boss. He gave me an email address of the spell caster who helped him get his wife back, i never believed this would work but i had no choice that to get in contact with the spell caster which i did, and he requested for my information and that of my husband along with our marriage pic. He also told me that i was going to pay the sum of $170 to enable him cast the spell and i sent him the money, but after three days, my mom called my that my husband came pleading that he wants me back, i never believed it because it was just like a dream and i had to rush down to my mothers place and to my greatest surprise, my husband was kneeling before me pleading for forgiveness that he wants me and the kid back home, then i gave Dr. Okirika a called regarding sudden change of my husband and he made it clear to me that my husband will love me till the end of the world, that he will never leave my sight. Now me and my husband is back together again and has started doing pleasant things he hasn't done before, he makes me happy and do what he is suppose to do as a man without nagging. Please if you need help of any kind, kindly contact Dr. Okirika for help and you can reach him via email: okirikaspiritualhindustemple@gmail.com
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